The Start
by Always In My Memory
Summary: A story about Nessie and Jake's life together and all the trials they face in the start. When we stopped spinning I looked up at him smiling. He lifted one of his hands off my back and brushed it across my cheek. "Renesmee," he whispered.
1. Chapter 1 Snowy Day

**Chapter 1. Snowy Day Nessie's POV**

This mourning I woke up to find snow falling outside. It looked beautiful. There was already about an inch or so on the ground, the snow covered the trees, and with the sun raising in between the mountains the scene took your breath away. This is a moment I would like to spend with Jacob I thought to myself and then sighed.

Jake, he had been in my life from the very day I was born and there is no way I could imagine my life without him, it would be incomplete. Over the years my feelings towards him have changed ever so slightly. Here lately though my feeling have changed drastically. I now notice things about him I have never noticed before. The way his muscles flex when he is doing something that would cause I strain, his abs when we go swimming, his perfect smile set against his dark; tan skin, and then there is the way he makes me feel inside. He makes me feel alive, safe, perfect, and secure wonderful, loved, and meaningful. He would do anything I asked of him with a smile on his face. I love his careless banter and how he always brings a smile to my face. I love it when he is sweet and thoughtful. I love everything about him.

I will not tell him any of this though. I will not tell him how I feel because I am afraid he will just write me off as some kid. Technically I am just 6 but it's not like I look or feel like a 6 year old. I look fully matured and that is the reason I can go to school now. School... It's Thursday so I have school. Crap. I got up to go pick out my clothes for the day when there is a knock at the door. "Come in," I yell. It's my mom.

"Hey sweetie, we are all down stairs and your dad heard you thinking about school clothes and he thought I should come tell you it's cancelled for today and tomorrow. The snow is worse closer to town." Damn. I thought dad would have heard everything I just thought about Jake...You would think I would know how to control my thoughts. "Nessie!" my dad cautioned and I groaned. I was not allowed to cuss verbally or even in my own head! It was crazy! My mom continued, "Anyway I don't know what you are doing to annoy your father but we are having a snowball fight later and tomorrow we are going to Alaska to visit Tanya and the family do you want to come?"

"No," I answered, "I think I need a little TLC."

"Alright then," she responded, "Esme is making you breakfast it should be ready in about 5 minutes."

"Alright, thanks mom."

"You're welcome sweet heart."

With that she left me alone in my room. I went to my closet and picked out a pair of black skinny jeans, durable ugg boots, and a flannel shirt. I went to the bathroom and pulled my hair up into a sloppy pony tail, the sexy kind with a couple fly aways. I didn't bother with make up because I was just with my family and I've been without make up in front of them a thousand times. I went down stairs to eat my breakfast.

Esme had made me sunny side eggs, bacon, a biscuit, and poured me a glass of chocolate milk. I don't bother with the regular milk because who likes that? I noticed there was another plate sitting next to me and I asked my grandmother, "Who's the other plate for?"

She laughed her trilling laugh and said, "Who's it always for?" I laughed too.

"I just figured with the snow he wouldn't come over today."

With what I had just said she gave another laugh, "Renesmee sweetie I worry about you sometimes," she laughs again and continues, "he only lives one mile away and he is a wolf he has his ways of getting here plus according to Alice we won't have a foot here until at least 10:30," and with that she gracefully left the room to join the others.

I ate in silence by myself for a while. Then I heard my lullaby from when I was a baby playing on the piano. My dad had composed it the day after the Volturi left. He was rejoiceful and completely happy, proud, and content in his life and that is what the music reflected. Happiness. I ate my last bite as he played the last note. As a got up to go wash my plate and silverware Jake came in the door.

"Hey Ness," he greeted me.

"Hey Jake," I replied, "I would have waited and ate with you but I was starving and didn't know when you'd get here so..." I trailed off.

"Don't worry a thing about it; it's not a big deal I promise. You ate so what?"

I laughed as I always did in his presence and started on the dishes. As I did this I glanced up at him and watched him as he ate. He was wearing a black muscle shirt that clung to his body and showed off every single one of his perfect abs. He caught me staring at him and I felt the blood rush to my cheeks. Damn human genes I thought and I heard and ever so subtle Ness come from my dad in the other room.

"Enjoying the view?" Jake asked chuckling.

"Sorry, you know me I get lost in thought and don't know what I'm doing."

He laughed, "You think I don't know that you've been scrubbing the same fork for like 2 minutes!"

"It has not been 2 minutes!" I teased.

"Oh yes it has! I promise you!"

"Well if you have a problem with me making sure everybody has clean utensils then you can just clean your own dishes," I said.

"Me, you, and the occasional visitor are the only ones who use the utensils anyway."

"Well excuse me for trying to make things easier on Esme," I said and walked out of the room.

As I walked out of the room I saw the shocked look on Jake's face. I understood the look we had just been goofing off then I snapped on him. The reason is I find it hard to fake my feelings for him now to act like I'm not attracted to him in the way that I am. To just be his friend. I walked into the living room where my family was having a debate on how they wanted to get to the Denali's home.

"I want to run there. It's winter and the bears are mid hibernation right now that is the BEST time to hunt them!" Uncle Emmett whined.

"Emmett that will take too long. Flying would be much quicker," my father said.

"Oh well that's lame," Uncle Em complained, "Plus it's snowing wont the airport be closed or something."

"I don't see the airports being closed," Aunty Alice stated.

"Why don't we compromise," Grandpa Carlisle suggested, "we could fly to Seattle and then drive the rest of the way and stop to hunt some grizzly."

"Works for me," my dad said smiling.

"Fine," Uncle Em grubbed and everybody laughed.

Unless he got his way Uncle Emmett always sulked. He was just like an irritable grizzly I thought to myself. Out of the corner of my eye I saw my dad with his famous crocked grin planted on his face nod ever so slightly and I laughed. As I laughed Jake walked in and said, "What's so funny?"

"Oh, nothing," I said smiling, "did you have fun doing the dishes?"

"Loads," he said his voice rich with sarcassam, "it was just dandy." My dad started to chuckle and I smirked.

"Well Renesmee," my father said, "since we don't have school today it is the perfect time to practice the piano."

I smiled. My dad had been teaching me the piano for a long time. I'm not as good as him, but he has an upper advantage he has been playing for hundreds of years. I am however better than the average human. I can sing too. I love to sing. I feel alive when I sing. My parents are the only ones who have heard me though because I won't allow the rest of my family to listen. I'm sure they hear because they _are _vampires but I like to think they haven't heard me. I walked in to our music room and sat at my piano and just started to play whatever came to mind. Some songs my dad would play with me on his piano but most he just liked to listen with a smile on his face.

I had probably been playing for two hours and then I began to sing. I loved songs from about half a decade back. Actually I love any music I just have my favorites. I loved "BlahBlahBlah" by Ke$ha but daddy won't let me sing it so I settled for "When I look at you" by Miley Cyrus. I'm not a huge Miley fan but I love that song. I began to play and sing.

_Everybody needs inspiration,_

_Everybody needs a soul._

_A beautiful melody,_

_When the nights are long._

_Cause there is no guarantee,_

_That this life is easy._

_And when my world is falling apart._

_When there's no light to break up the dark,_

_That's when I, I, I look at you._

_When the waves are flooding the shore,_

_and I can't find my way home anymore._

_That's when I, I, I look at you._

_When I look at you,_

_I see forgiveness,_

_I see the truth._

_You love me for who I am,_

_Like the stars hold the moon,_

_Right there where they belong._

_and I know I'm not alone._

As I was singing I heard the door open but I wasn't going to stop. I was invested in the song. I could feel it. I could feel my fingers drifting along the keys and I could feel the music as I sang. It was one of the best feelings and I wasn't going to stop.

_Yeah when my world is falling apart,_

_When there's no light to break up the dark,_

_That's when I, I, I look at you._

_When the waves are flooding the shore,_

_and I can't find my way home anymore,_

_That's when I, I, I look at you._

For the next part I poured my whole heart and soul into it finish with a bang.

_You, appear just like a dream to me._

_Just like kaleidoscope colors,_

_That cover me,_

_All I need,_

_Every breath that I breathe,_

_Don't you know you're beautiful!_

_Yeah_

_When the waves are flooding the shore,_

_and I can't find my way home anymore,_

_That's when I, I, I look at you._

_I look at you, Yeah, Woah._

_You, appear just like a dream to me. _

I played the last notes of the song and let them hang there. Then I looked up to see Jake standing there. His eyes where wide and bemused. He looked shocked. I thought for sure he had heard me sing "I'm walking on Sunshine" before guess not.

"Ness, that was absolutely amazing!" he whispered, "I've never heard anything like it before!"

"Thanks," I blushed, _and that's the reason why I only sing in front of my front of my dad _I added mentally and daddy laughed.

"Well anyway," Jake went on unaware of the other conversation, "we are ready for the snowball fight," he said smiling.

Me and my dad got up to go outside where we assumed the rest of my family would be waiting for us. When we got outside however nobody was there. I turned to my dad and thought, "_Where is everybody?"_

He didn't respond instead he reached out quickly and threw a snowball at me he was the only one I saw but I felt 8 other snowballs hit me. I turned to face my family with a shocked expression on my face and they just started cracking up laughing. "Oh it's on," I yelled. I went straight for Emmett who was on the snow covered ground doubled over in laughter. Once I hit him the full snowball fight was on!


	2. Chapter 2 That Evening

**Chapter 2: That Evening Nessie's POV**

We broke off into teams. Uncle Emmett, Grandpa Carlisle, Aunty Alice, Dad, and myself against Aunt Rose, Grandma Esme, Uncle Jazz, Jake, and momma. While we were dividing up into teams Emmett was hilarious! He said there was no way he was going up against Alice and my dad because he would not be on a losing team.

He was right of course. We played until there was no snow left in our large yard and my team won. We all knew we would but in the end it didn't really matter to anyone but Emmett. I noticed my dad was aiming a lot of shots at Jake and I wondered why. I should have asked him before he left I thought.

I was by myself my family had already left for Alaska. Jake was still here but he was upstairs taking a shower. He offered to take me out to eat and to see a movie and I said yes willingly.

I need to shower and to change out of my wet snowy clothes and headed upstairs. I undressed and went to my conecting bathroom to shower. Once I was out of the shower I realized I had forgotten my phone downstairs.

I figured Jake wouldn't be down there so I wrapped a towel around myself and went to grab my phone. I found it in between the cushions and looked up to see Jake standing in the doorway. He was standing there apple in hand and a towel wrapped around his torso.

"Oh," I said standing up.

"I...Um...Came to grab a snack I didn't know you would be down here," he stammered.

"Phone," I said showing it to him to kind of explain myself. Was it just me or was there an obvious attraction between us. Ugh. It's probably just me.

"Ah, I see. Well I'll be ready in about 5 minutes it doesn't take me that long when will you be ready?"

"Well that depends," I stated, "where exactly are we going to be going to eat?"

"Well I was going to let you decide between Southern Flavor and Ta He Mecca."

It's a good thing I asked I thought. I would wear a completely different outfit to each place. Gosh men don't they get that? I was in the mood for chicken so I wanted some Southern Flavor.

"Southern Flavor," I replied.

"Southern Flavor it is," he smiled. Damn it. Why did he have to be so hot! Geese.

I bolted upstairs to get ready. Once I was there I realized I hadn't told him how long I would be so I quickly yelled out, "About 10 minutes," and continued getting ready. When you ate at Southern Flavor you kind of dressed like you where from the south. I love the south and that is where I want to live but thanks to the sparkly skin of vampires I can't. As I thought of my dream of living in the south I picked out what I would wear.

I found a red cotton strapless dress, brown belt, and some cowboy boots to match. The cute kind not actual cowboy boots. I puffed my bangs and put on some make up. I put on some simple pieces of jewelry and I was ready to go. When I went down stairs I saw Jake waiting for me. He was wearing a black V-neck jacket and dark colored jeans. He looked amazing I thought.

When he saw me he got up and said, "You look stunning! Are you ready to go?"

"Thanks, you don't look half bad yourself, and yea I'm ready," half bad I thought. That was the understatement of the year! As I thought that I thanked my lucky stairs my dad wasn't around for this and then thought. Wait are we going on a date?

The car ride was pretty quite but not in the weird way. It was peaceful. That is until I turned on the radio and started belting the tunes. When I turned on the radio it was halfway through Miley Cyrus "I can't be tamed." Why is it always her songs I thought to myself but sang it anyway.

_Well I'm not a trick you play_

_I'm wired the different way_

_I'm not a mistake_

_I'm not a fake_

_It's set in my DNA_

_Don't change me_

_Don't change me_

_Don't change me_

_Don't change me_

_(I can't be tamed)_

_I wanna fly_

_I wanna drive_

_I wanna go_

_I wanna be a part of something I don't know_

_And if you try to hold me back I might explode_

_Baby, by now you should know_

_I can't be tamed_

_I can't be saved_

_I can't be blamed_

_I can't can't_

_I can't can't be tamed_

_I can't be changed_

_I can't be tamed_

_I can't be can't I can't be tamed_

"Can we please turn it on to something decent," he pleaded, "and Ness your dad would **kill** you if he saw you dancing like that!"

He had a point there, "Jake I'm not _really_ dancing, dancing and he's not here and you will not think about this!"

"Sure, Sure," he said.

I started to do through the stations and finally settled on the old Blue Foundation song "Eyes on Fire." Even though it was really old I still loved the song. Music now just isn't like it used to be that's why in clubs and stuff they play older songs that people still love regardless of when they were recorded.

"Hey Jake," I asked in my whiney You-Know-I'm-About-To-Ask-You-For-Something voice.

"Yesss," he answered in his I'm-So-Not-Gonna-Like-This-Voice.

"Can we please, please, pleaseee go clubbing tonight! Please my parents aren't here and it's only me and you! I have to live a little sometimes! Please I promise I'll keep my dad of your back! Please," I begged bringing out the puppy dog eyes.

"Fine," he grumbled, "you do need to get out and live a little. Your freaking puppy dog look pushed me over the edge." Yes I thought! I knew they would work. "You better keep your dad off my back and you better love me forever," he joked.

"I promise to keep you safe from my dad and to love you forever," as I spoke those words I realized how true those words were.

He smiled, "Okay, then. Do you want to skip the movie and go straight to clubbing after dinner?"

"Hell Yes," I answered and he laughed. He didn't mind me cussing like my dad he knew I was a teen at heart.

We had just arrived at the restaurant. He got out of the car and came to open my door for me. He helped me out of the car, not that I needed the help, and held my hand as we walked to the door. We've always held hands, it's nothing new but it somehow felt different now like it held a different meaning for both of us. We went inside and a pretty brunette took us to our both in the back while we waited for our waiter I finally caved and asked the question that has been bothering me for a while.

"Is this a date," I blurted out and blushed instantly.

He smiled and said, "It is if you want it to be," and I smiled at the thought.

"Sure, why not," I smiled and I was rewarded with his answering smile.

While we ate we made small talk. We had many fun and flirty debates. While we were deep in conversation neither of us had noticed how much we had leaned forward until our waiter came back and cleared his throat. We both straightened up and acted like nothing happened. Now I know there is something between us I just don't know what. Now we are in the car.

An old Blackeyed Peas c.d. is blasting from the stereo with both of us singing along. We are so happy together but how do I know if he feels the same? We _are_ on a date I thought. I didn't have much time to really go into deep thought on the whole **us **situation because we had just arrived at the club.

Like he had before he got out and came over to my side and held my hand as he helped me out and we walked in. The very end of "Show off that Body you got" was playing and I groaned.

"What's wrong?" Jake asked.

"I love that song."

"It's okay," he said, "I got this," and with that he walked away. He went over to the D.J. and came back over to me. "Let's dance," he said.

He took me out to the dance floor and he told me he had requested to songs for me one was Usher's "Yeah" and the other was "Cyclone." I was ecstatic! Those where some of the best dance songs. That's when "Yeah" started to play and I was lost in the music.

_[Usher:]_

_A Town's Down!_

_[Lil' Jon:]_

_Yeah, Ok! Lil' Jon!_

_[Usher:]_

_Yeah, Yeah Yeah, Yeah yeah, Yeaah_

_Yeah, Yeah yeah, Yeah yeah, Yeaah_

_[Usher (Verse 1):]_

_I'm in the club with my homies, tryna get a lil V-I, keep it down on the low key, cause you know how it feels._

_I said shorty she was checkin up on me, from the game she was spittin my ear you'd think that she knew me._

_So we decided to chill_

_Conversation got heavy, she had me feelin like she's ready to blow!_

_(Watch Out!, Watch Out!)_

_She saying come get me, come get me,_

_So I got up and followed her to the floor, she said baby lets go,_

_When I told her I said_

_[Usher (Chorus):]_

_Yeah (yeah) Shorty got down to come and get me_

_Yeah (yeah) I got so caught up I forgot she told me_

_Yeah (yeah) Cause if my girl new it'd be best to hold me_

_Yeah (yeah) Next thing I knew she was all up on me screaming:_

_Yeah, Yeah yeah, Yeah yeah, Yeaah_

_Yeah, Yeah yeah, Yeah yeah, Yeaah_

_[Usher (Verse 2):]_

_She's all up in my head now, got me thinking that it might good idea to take her with me,_

_Cause she's ready to leave._

_Now I gotta keep it real now, cause on a one-to-ten she's a certified twenty, and that just aint me._

_Cause I do know if I take that chance just where is it gonna lead,_

_But what I do know is the way she dance makes shorty alright with me._

_The way she getting low!_

_I'm like yeah, just work that out for me._

_She asked for one more dance and I'm_

_Like yeah, how the hell am I supposed to leave?_

_And I said_

_[Chorus]_

_[Lil' Jon:]_

_Luda!_

_[Ludacris (Verse 3):]_

_Watch out!_

_My outfit's ridiculous, In the club lookin' so conspicuous._

_And Rowl! These women al on the prowl, if you hold the head steady I'm a milk the cow._

_Forget about the game I'm a spit the truth, I won't stop till I get em in they birthday suits._

_So gimmie the rhythm and it'll be off with they clothes, then bend over to the front and touch your toes._

_I left the jag and I took the roles, if they aint cutting then I put em on foot patrol._

_How you like me now, when my pinky's valued over three hundred thousand,_

_Lets drank you the one to please, Ludacris fill cups like double d's._

_Me and Ush once more and we leave em dead, we want a lady in the street but a freak in the bed to say_

_[Chorus]_

_[Ludacris (Bridge):]_

_Take that and rewind it back, Lil' Jon got the beat make ya booty go (clap)_

_Take that and rewind it back, Usher got the voice make ya booty go (clap)_

_Take that and rewind it back, Ludacris got the flow make ya booty go (clap)_

_Take that and rewind it back, Lil' Jon got the beat make ya booty go (clap)_

_Usher Yeah _

Let's just say I was dancing in a way that was making Jake go crazy and I wasn't at my full capacity because I was in a dress. That's when I remembered Alice always had backup clothes for various reasons in the back of every car. I grabbed Jake's keys and told him I'd be back in a second. I went out grabbed the clothes and went to the bathroom.

I changed into a sparkly no back low-cut top halter, some white booty shorts, and settled on a pair of hot pink converse. I brought my old clothes back to the car and returned to Jake when he saw me his jaw dropped. Sweet success I thought to myself.

"Ness your dad would kill you," he stuttered.

My reply was pulling him to the dance floor and whispering, "Don't think about it in his year." I left him there and went to the D.J. to request "He Said, She Said" by Ashley Tisdale. I was bummed about missing "Cyclone" to change but I knew me _and_ Jake could dance to this one. Once I got back to Jake the song began to play.

_Ahhh_

_Boy walkin' the spot he so fresh and (uh huh)_

_He got what he needs impressin' (uh huh)_

_Just look at the way that he dressin' (uh huh)_

_Ain't no question chicks like oh _... Jake danced for that section and a circle was already beginning to form around us. We both loved it. Then it was my turn.

_Girl walk in the spot she stop traffic (uh huh)_

_She blowin' your mind with her asset (uh uh)_

_So Jessica Alba fantastic_

_Instant classic boys like oh _Then we danced together.

_Baby I can see us movin' like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us touchin' like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us kissin' like that (like that)_

_We don't need no more than the he said, she said_

_Baby I can see us movin' like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us touchen' like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us kissen like that (like that)_

_We don't need another he said, she said_

_He said girl you winning_

_She said boy where you been at (where you been)_

_Stop talkin' lets get with it_

_Just like that they_

_He said your amazing_

_She said then why you waiting_

_No more deliberating_

_Wat'cha doin' lets get moving_

_Just like that they_

_Uh_

_Boy acting as if there's no pressure_

_He'd do anything to get with her_

_He say anything to convince her_

_Money spent to diamonds send her_

_Girl playing it cool but she's wit it_

_She loving the fact she's gifted_

_Everything that he do she gets lifted_

_Feels so wicked loving like oh_

_Baby I can see us movin' like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us touchen' like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us kissin' like that (like that)_

_We don't need no more that he said, she said_

_Baby I can see us movin like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us touchin' like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us kissin' like that (like that)_

_He said girl you winning_

_She said boy where you been at (where you been)_

_Stop talkin' lets get with it_

_Just like that they_

_He said your amazing_

_She said then why you waiting_

_No more deliberating_

_Wat'cha doin' lets get to movin'_

_Just like that they_

_One night with you_

_Boy just one night with you_

_All the things we can do_

_Everyday I think of_

_one night with you_

_No one else but us two_

_All our dreams would come true_

_If we just get together! (yeah yeah yeah)_

_Baby I can see us movin' like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us touchen' like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us kissin' like that (like that)_

_We don't need no more that he said, she said_

_Baby I can see us movin' like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us touchin' like that (like that)_

_Baby I can see us kissin' like that (like that)_

_We don't need no more that he said, she said_

_Uh What You Waiting for_

_He said girl you winning_

_She said boy where you been at (where you been)_

_Stop talkin' lets get with it_

_Just like that they_

_He said your amazing_

_She said then why you waiting_

_No more deliberating_

_Wat'cha doin' lets get to movin'_

_Just like that they_

_Give it to me baby! _I gave in...I taughnted him even more at the end I was driving him crazy!

_You're gonna like it (uh)_

_You're gonna want it (uh)_

_You're gonna like it (uh)_

_We don't need no more that he said she said_

_You're gonna like it (yeah)_

_You're gonna want it (you're gonna want it)_

_You're gonna like it (yeah yeah)_

_We don't need no more that he said she said _

I ended leaning into him. My hands on his chest his hands on my bare back the contact made my skin tingle. "Renesmee," he whispered and a caved and gave in. I kissed him and he responded the moment my lips touched his. It was amazing are lips moving together like that. I heard the crowd cheering and pulled away both of us where wide eyed. "Let's go," I whispered and he nodded and we left.


	3. Chapter 3 Confessions

**Chapter 3: Confessions- Nessie's POV**

After we left Jake didn't take me home like I thought he would. Instead we went to a park. It was a nice park about 20 miles or so from home. I could walk there easily if I wanted to. Once we were there Jake took me to a pair of swings that over looked a little stream. I smiled and then I heard him sigh.

"Renesmee, your parents told me that when the time was right I could tell you the whole story. Well all of what I was a part of, without asking them permission first. I'm sure you have no idea what I'm talking about but please just listen it will all make since in the end." I nodded and he continued.

"I'm sure your parents will fill you in on what I don't know later but please, please remember that the reason we kept these things from you is so you could make your own choices. Also if we told you one thing we would have to tell you the other. That is why you are going to find out now. I know it sounds confusing but it will make since soon I promise." I was shocked my family had kept things from me. How bad could they be to have kept them from me for this long?

Jake continued, "A long time ago when your mom was human some things happened. It was your mom's 18th birthday and Alice through her a party. As your mom was opening one of her gifts she got a paper cut. I guess Jasper was thirsty or something because he tried to attack your mom. Your dad had to protect her and she ended up getting a huge gash in her arm and needing stitches. Carlisle was the only one who could stay in the room with her and even your dad had to leave."

"Your dad went off feeling all guilty. He thought Bella would have a better life with him out of the picture so he left." My eyes got huge. My dad actually left my mom? Jake seeing my reaction went on. "He did it to protect her. He thought she could actually lead a normal life. I know; I know it was a stupid move but it happened. Can I go on now?" I just nodded at a loss for words.

"Anyway your mom was really messed up when he left. She didn't really eat; she didn't have friends anymore because she had stopped talking to them. She had nightmares. She would wake up screaming Ness. It was bad. For months she wouldn't talk to anyone not even Charlie."

"I don't know some of this stuff so you'll have to ask your mom why she came to me but for whatever reason she did." Jake was looking straight forward and so was I so he couldn't see the tears that where coming down my face. How could my dad have done that to my mom? How could he be so stupid? Jake went on, "I fixed up a pair of motorbikes for her for whatever reason she wanted to ride them. I didn't just fix the bikes though I started to heal her too. She wasn't in as much pain when she was with me and I could make her smile when no one else could. She used to say I was her own personal sun. That things weren't that bad when she was with me."

"I ended up falling in love with her." That hurt, that hurt really bad. The tears feel harder. "I hated your dad too. I didn't know how he could be so stupid and just walk away from your mom. When he came back, after your mom went to rescue him from the Volturi I couldn't believe she just took him back like that. I knew she was in love with me too, she just didn't know it." How much longer could I cry this hard and in silence?

He went on to my dismay, "I'll try to start wrapping things up and make a long story short. Me and your dad we were kind of fighting over your mom. Eventually I got her to kiss me and that's when she realized she was in love with me too." I had heard enough I stood up to leave and that's when Jake finally looked at me.

"Awh Ness," he said trying to embrace me but I side stepped and wouldn't let him touch me.

"I've heard enough," I said and started to walk away as the tears fell even harder.

"But not everything," he whispered looking a little hurt but right now I could care less.

"Tell to me another time Jacob," I yelled and started walking for the woods. As I walked I said, "You better not even think of following me home or coming to my house later! Don't call me or the rest of my family if you haven't heard from me by 3 tomorrow then you can come over but until then you better leave me alone damn it," I yelled.

Then I was off. I ran as fast as I possibly could. It was times like these I wished I was a full vampire. The running helped kind of numb me though. As soon as I got home however I was a mess.

I walked into the living room and a completely broke down. I was in pain a lot of pain I couldn't believe Jake had loved my mom. That my dad and Jake would fight over her! I was shaking violently letting the tremors roll through me. How many more tears could I produce? How much longer could I cry? I didn't even know the whole story. Gosh, I was a mess! That's when I heard the noise outside.

I jumped up from my position on the floor and looked outside. I was mortified! I saw a big wolf standing outside. I ran outside with a tear stained face. Was he here to hurt me even more? Did he want to explain himself? I suddenly realized I just didn't care. I told him to not call or come here. I told him that for a reason I needed to be alone didn't he get that?Jake walked into the woods in his wolf from and came back out in human form with some sweatpants on.

"Ness please listen to me," he begged but I wasn't having any of it.

"Jake I told you not to come here! I'm hurt I'm sure you can see that but I need to be alone," I screeched.

"Renesmee sweetie, please listen to be," he said in a soft voice.

"Not now, just not now okay. I promise I'll talk to you later. Please leave," I whispered.

This time he actually listened to me. He walked away as he was walking away he said, "I'll be here at twelve o'clock."

As soon as he was gone I ran straight for my room and started pulling off my clothes. I changed into some sturdy shorts, tank top, and tennis shoes. I through my hair up into a ponytail and started throwing clothes into a suitcase. I packed a back pack with about $10,000 cash, my IPod, phone, and any chargers I would need and I bolted down the stairs.

I found a pen and paper and wrote a letter my family would find.

_Dear Mom and Dad,_

_I really need to figure some things out right now and I would rather appreciate it if you didn't look for me. I'm a big girl and can make my own discussion and you know I won't hesitate to call if I am in trouble and need you. I'll text you everyday to let you know I'm okay. You can call if you would like but the chances of me answering are slim so I wouldn't even bother. Don't try to talk me into coming back home because I will come back when I'm ready. I'm honestly having an emotional breaking down right now and I'm not going to be going through it in front of my mind reading father and emotion feeling Uncle. So please just leave me be. If I need anything I will call or get a hold of you in some way I promise. I just can't be here right now. It hurts too much and I'm the only one in the house. I'll be perfectly safe where I am going I promise. I'll give you a warning before I come back but PLEASE I beg of you let me be. I'll be back sooner that way. I love you all so, so much and please know I'm not doing this to hurt you. I'm doing this because it is what I need to do. _

_I'll see you later,_

_Xoxo Renesmee xoxo_

_P.S. PLEASE don't be mad. Don't be mad at me, yourself, Jake, or anybody. Xoxo_

After I wrote that tear stained letter I cried even harder as I left for the airport. I got in my truck and left. Jake was coming tomorrow at twelve probably earlier but I would all ready be long gone. I left my home behind me and cried harder because I didn't know when I would be back, but I knew I had to leave.

I had to leave it all behind me to save my sanity. On the car ride to the airport I was debating on going to see the Amazon Coven or if I should go see Nahuel and his aunt. I decided on the Amazon coven I hadn't seen Zafrina for 3 years when she came to visit. I would visit her. I always had fun with her and I was amazed by them. They had stopped hunting humans long ago and where now proud vegetarians. If I still feel like visiting Nahuel I thought, I'll just visit him before I come back.

I went into the airport, but the first ticket to leave and boarded in 1st class. It was going to be a long tear filled night. How many tears can one person produce I thought to myself and was thankful that only a hand full of others where in first class with me. If I were them I would gladly go sit in coach because they are going to hear me cry all night.

As I thought this we started going down the runway. I buckled up and sat back. We lifted off the ground and I was officially leaving home for who knows how long.


	4. Chapter 4 What have I done?

**Chapter 4: What have I done? Jacob's POV**

I was in the wood now after leaving at Nessie's request. I shouldn't have gone in the first place. I knew she need time but I had to tell her that none of that mattered that I loved her. There was no way I was waiting until twelve like I had told her. I couldn't. I would be there at dawn when she would wake up.

I would be there waiting at the doorstep to explain and take her in my arms. She was ready to be my girlfriend. I knew that now. I mean she was the one who kissed me and I kissed her back eagerly. We had been dancing before the kiss.

The way she moved her body was amazing and that outfit! I was going absolutely crazy! I had wanted her and wanted her bad. Then we kissed and it felt like magic. Like nothing I had ever experienced before. It was incredible, but when the crowd began to cheer she pulled away and I knew I had to tell her.

Three years after she was born Bella and Edward had a talk with me. They told me that whenever Nessie made the first move I could tell her there story and how I imprinted on her. They said they would go back later and go over the details but it was my job to give it to her first. Bella said, "If it really is the right time then she'll listen to you and if she stops listening you know she'll come around because she would miss you too much. Just try to tell her as quickly and painlessly as possible."

So it was either not the right time or I dragged it out to long. I probably should have started with my imprinting. Gosh she is back at her house in pain and she is all alone crying. I couldn't get the image of her balled up holding her chest to keep herself together. It reminded me so much of Bella and what she looked like when Edward left her and she was falling apart. I didn't leave I thought and then suddenly realized I had. Sure she told me to, but was that really the right thing to do?

It had been about an hour since I left the Cullen's mansion/ house. I should go back. I'm going back even if she doesn't want me there she needs me there. I will not leave her like Edward left Bella. Sure he had good intentions but he was wrong. I was listening to Renesmee but that was wrong so I started running back.

I ran as fast as my legs would take me. I was about thirty minutes away. Why did I leave? She needs me. What is wrong with me? Surely she wouldn't do anything stupid I thought and then it hit me. She would do something stupid, maybe not intentionally but she was Bella's daughter. She _would _do something stupid. My legs ran faster than I ever thought possible. I had to make sure she was okay.

I was just getting to the edge of the forest near the Cullen's and I stopped to listen for a heartbeat. I didn't hear one. Why didn't I hear one? Where the hell was she? I shifted and ran up to the house. I yelled her name several times with no reply. Oh, this is not good I thought as I opened the door to her house.

I walked in and didn't see anything out of the ordinary so I went up to her room. The clothes she had been wearing where just thrown on the ground along with other garments. That was out of the ordinary she usually kept her room perfect. I looked in her closet to see that a chunk of her summer clothes where missing I had seen her closet enough times to know that. Why would her summer clothes be gone? I decided to go look in the kitchen.

I walked in and didn't see anything out of the ordinary. As I was leaving a piece of paper on the counter caught my eye. I went over to the table and picked it up. It was a letter from Renesmee to her parents. There were tear stains all over it. It read:

_Dear Mom and Dad,_

_I really need to figure some things out right now and I would rather appreciate it if you didn't look for me. I'm a big girl and can make my own discussion and you know I won't hesitate to call if I am in trouble and need you. I'll text you everyday to let you know I'm okay. You can call if you would like but the chances of me answering are slim so I wouldn't even bother. Don't try to talk me into coming back home because I will come back when I'm ready. I'm honestly having an emotional breaking down right now and I'm not going to be going through it in front of my mind reading father and emotion feeling Uncle. So please just leave me be. If I need anything I will call or get a hold of you in some way I promise. I just can't be here right now. It hurts too much and I'm the only one in the house. I'll be perfectly safe where I am going I promise. I'll give you a warning before I come back but PLEASE I beg of you let me be. I'll be back sooner that way. I love you all so, so much and please know I'm not doing this to hurt you. I'm doing this because it is what I need to do. _

_I'll see you later,_

_Xoxo Renesmee xoxo_

I was shaking. Where was she? Where had she gone? I didn't bother going looking for her I knew she would already be long gone. "Shit," I murmured. I was going to have to call Edward and Bella. How was I supposed to tell them their only daughter had run away from home and it was my entire fault. That I left when she told me to leave only so she could leave without being stopped. Edward was so going to kill me and I don't blame him.

I picked up the phone and first tried Nessie it went to her voice mail, "_Jake I told you not to come until three tomorrow and you still said twelve. You no doubt are at my house now which is why you called. I'm going to get rid of my voice mail after you call Jake. I need my space. Please understand that. I'm hurt. I'm going to get away for a while and I promise this is not your fault. I'll be back soon just remember that, well, Jacob I love you. I... I mean... Jacob I'm in love with you and when we kissed I think you felt the same way. Oh, Jake before I go I just thought I should tell you that was a great first kiss but this has been a crappy night. I love you I think. Bye."_

The phone clicked off there and asked if I wanted to leave a message, so I did, "_Renesmee Carlie Cullen, I hope you know that I _do _love you. I don't know if you will listen to this message or not so that's the only important thing I'll say. I'll tell you this much, you will be getting a lot of calls from me every day and I hope that you listen to the messages. I will give you a week though and even through that week now that every second I will be thinking of you. Nessie you don't know the whole story and I'll let you know in the next voicemail I leave you. I'm about to call your parents. I hope your dad doesn't kill me but I wouldn't blame him if he did. Bye Ness, I love you."_

I hung up the phone and let a few tears run down my check. What have I done? It was time I had to call Edward and Bella. They needed to know their daughter wasn't at home though I may not tell them that now. I picked up my phone and called Bella's cell.

She picked up on the first ring, "Hey Jake," she said cheerily and I could hear the car in the background along with classical music. WTF is she listening to I thought.

"Hey Bells," I said in a sad mono tone, "I think you need to turn around and come home. Maybe just you and Edward I don't know but if I were you I would come home."

I heard Edward tell Bella to give him the phone and it was he who was talking now, "Why do we need to come home," he growled.

"Gosh Edward. I really don't want to tell you this over the phone. But...Well..."

"Spit it out now!"

"Okay, Ness kind of ran away from home I guess you could say."

I heard the breaks slam and the tires squeal as Edward turned around. I also hear Bella yell, "She did what?" Bella had the phone again and Edward was driving faster than before the other Cullens had to be wondering what was up but Bella started yelling at me, "What do you mean she ran away? How could she run away? Why would she run away? What happened Jake? Tell me! Tell Me now Jake! Now!"

She had begun to sob and I felt like a horrible person, "I'm so sorry Bells. She had kissed me..." I couldn't finish because I heard Edward growl and Bella was screaming again. "She what," she yelled.

"Bella would you please let me finish," I screamed back and she was silent. "We had been dancing and she kissed me. I promise she made the first move. She was even the one who wanted to dance. You and Edward had told me that when she was ready and made the first move I could tell her everything."

"I got to the part of the story where you realized you where in love with me too. She didn't hear about the imprinting or how it was her from the very beginning. She ran away to your house tears running down her face. She told me not to try to talk to her until at least three tomorrow. I didn't listen to her though. Maybe if I would have she wouldn't have run away."

"I went to yalls house I looked in the windows and saw her. Bella she reminded me of you when Edward left. She was balled up clutching her sides trying to hold herself together. She came out to yell at me and told me to leave so I did, but I still came back."

"I came back just a few minutes ago to find her summer clothes gone out of her closet, her room a mess, and a note for you two. I tried calling her but it went to voice mail. I told her I would give her space and not call her for a week. I'm sorry Bella! I'm sorry Edward! I'm so, so sorry," I finished starting to sob.

"Jacob," Bella sighed, "it's in no way your fault. Even Edward says it's not your fault. We will be back in a couple hours okay, so get some sleep and we should be there when you wake up," and with that she hung up and the line went dead.

I was drained emotionally more than physically and decided that sleep would do me good. I went upstairs and got myself a pillow and blanket because I was crashing here tonight. I lay down and thought about Nessie as slipped into the sweetness that is sleep. Even as I slept though I dreamt of her. Of holding her in my arms and being there for her, and even in sleep I thought what have I done?


	5. Chapter 5 Myself, the Amazon Coven,

**Chapter 5. Myself, the Amazon Coven, Good News, and Bad News Nessie's POV **

I was in the Amazon with Kachiri, Zafrina, and Senna. They were thrilled when I showed up. Of course there were questions like, "What are you doing here?" "Does your family know?" "You look upset. Will you tell us what's wrong?"

How was I supposed to tell them that I ran away from home because of a werewolf that I was in love with? Who I found out used to be in love with my mom. How many times had I seen my mom hugging him and giving him kisses on the cheek? My dad seemed fine about it. Maybe he doesn't feel the same way now because he knew he lost so he's just taking the second runner up. Bella's daughter.

I was almost ready to go home. I felt like I could face everybody now without breaking down crying, yelling, and hurting everyone I loved and I just couldn't do that so I ran. Telling them to leave me alone.

Jake had left me a voicemail but I had yet to listen to it. I was shocked. It has been a week and that first call from Jake was the only phone call I had received. Maybe my family was actually listening to me and giving me space. I texted them every morning telling them I was okay and every night. I got the same response every time. The txt from my dad would read, "_I'm glad to hear that. Come home when you are ready._" Every time I got the same response. I sighed and got up to hunting with the three sisters.

For the past week we have talked, laughed and joked, and all around had some good old fashion girl time. It was just what I needed which is why I came here. Once I told them I couldn't answer all their questions they left the "why" questions alone. I was thinking about telling Zafrina my entire situation since I was closest to her but didn't know if she would have the answers or advice I so desperately needed.

I had left my phone at home I never bring it with me when I go hunting. At home I usually eat human food. I prefer animal blood but I do like human food a lot more than I did when I was younger. Lucky for me I've never had a draw to human blood so I don't have to worry about that. I had just killed a jaguar and was completely full. The others were still hunting but I decided to go back to their house. "Going back," I called and hoped they heard me but I was pretty certain they did.

Once I arrived at their house I decided to take a bath in the river. It was cold and the flow was strong but somehow felt good which I didn't really understand. I finished washing off and changed in the woods.

I had been wearing tank tops the whole time I was down here. Now though it was so incredibly hot, even for me I just put on a sports bra, booty shorts, and pulled my hair up. I didn't care at this point if I was dressed like a slut. It's not like it mattered here and it is soooo hot! I wish I had packed a bikini!

As I was arriving back at the "house" I realized that my favorite sisters still weren't back so I decided to text my dad and tell him I was still okay. In the morning I would text him and tell him I was coming home soon. I still didn't have an exact day planned but it would be soon. I walked over to the coach and grabbed my phone. My message light was beeping.

I had a new message from Jake but decided to listen to the old one first. I heard Jake's husky voice come on and he said, ""_Renesmee Carlie Cullen, I hope you know that I _do _love you. I don't know if you will listen to this message or not so that's the only important thing I'll say. I'll tell you this much, you will be getting a lot of calls from me every day and I hope that you listen to the messages. I will give you a week though and even through that week know that every second I will be thinking of you. Nessie you don't know the whole story and I'll let you know in the next voicemail I leave you. I'm about to call your parents. I hope your dad doesn't kill me but I wouldn't blame him if he did. Bye Ness, I love you." _

Tears where streaming down my face. So I knew that he did love me. He was giving me the time and space I needed. Why hadn't I listened to the voicemail sooner? I was such an idiot! He had sounded so sincere, but then I thought I'm still the second runner up and more tears fell down my checks. I decided to go ahead and listen to the second voicemail

Jake's voice filled the room as he said, "_Renesmee just in case you didn't listen to my other voicemail I love you. I love you so much. Yes at one point I did love your mom, but it wasn't really your mom I loved. I imprinted on you Nessie."_

_"Imprinting is a wolf thing. It's when you see your soul mate and nothing else in the world matters. It doesn't matter how old you are because all that matters is protecting you when you need to be protected and loving you in whatever way you need loved in that stage of your life."_

_"When you where young I loved you like a big brother loves his little sister. As you got older I started to become your best friend. Then as you began to mature like you are matured now that is when I completely fell in love with you. When I wanted to kiss you and hold you as close to me as possible and never let you go."_

_"You know Sam and Emily? Well Sam imprinted on Emily, just like Jared and Kim, and Quil and Claire. Claire is like eight now I think but Quil is like her big brother. One day, when it is right they will be something more."_

_"It was hard for your parents to accept. They had just had you and I was like "I imprinted on your daughter."Your mom completely freaked. Do you remember when you were like 3 days old and your mom tried to attack me well that was why."_

_"Renesmee I USED to love your mom and I still love her in a friend way, but don't you get it. It was you it was you from the very beginning. As you grew inside your mother our bond was growing stronger and it was hard to stay away. Once you were born and downstairs I didn't really feel the bond to be with your mom any more so I went downstairs."_

_"That is when I saw you. It was you I loved the whole time and I have NEVER known anyone who is better than you are because you are perfect. I love you so much it hurts that you are away from me. I don't know where you are and I haven't talked to you for a week, so please, please come home. I love you Nessie."_

Tears where streaming down my checks still. These where happy tears though. Jake loved me and it was me he loved all along. I wasn't second best I was _the_ best. I smiled. I opened my phone up to tell me dad that I would be on a plane in the morning but I had another voicemail.

I had gotten this I had got this one while I was listening to Jake's. It was from my dad. Why did he suddenly decide to call me? I decided to listen to it.

Now it was my dad's velvet voice that flooded the room, "_Renesmee you need to come home your mother needs you."_ His voice was pained and I could hear my mom tearlessly sobbing in the background. My dad was probably holding her trying to soothe her. "What's wrong?" I wanted to scream! Why was my mom so upset? My dad's voice continued.

_"Charlie well, he had a stroke. Your mom is very upset. She is blaming herself but I don't know why. He didn't pass away but is very weak and he is close. We are flying to Forks tonight your mom wants to spend as much time with him as possible and you should too. I'm sure he would like to see his granddaughter. We will be waiting in Forks."_

_"Ness we gave you time and we are hoping that if you are listening to this voicemail you have listened to Jake's and understand. He will be there too and even though it's under bad circumstances it would be a good chance for you to meet Billy."_

_"Renesmee you really need to come see Charlie. Plus we all really miss you. Alright I have to go I hope to see you in Forks. Bye sweetie, I love you."_

Tears where streaming down my face but they where no longer tears of joy. They were now tears of pain and sorrow. I wasn't leaving tomorrow mourning I was leaving now. I had to see Charlie who I haven't seen for 3 years and I was all grown up now.

Could I do it though? Could I look at him while he was so weak and not cry in his presences. Then I remembered something. My dad said Jake would be waiting too. I found comfort in that. He would be there to help me through this and my dad would be there to help my mom. We would get through this and I would get to spend some time with Charlie before he passed away.

At just the thought of that the tears feel harder and I knew I had to leave. I packed my bag and changed into the clothes of a normal human being and wrote a quick not for my Amazon sisters.

_I know you expected to find me here but I need to go back now. Charlie, my mother's father, has suffered stroke and I need to go see him. Thanks so much for letting me stay and visit with you it means a lot! I'll talk to you all soon! I love you guys!_

_~Nessie~_

After I left that note I started heading to the airport. I wasn't going back home but I was going to Forks. The place where I was born. The place where my parents, Charlie, and Jake where waiting for me.


	6. Chapter 6 Support

**Chapter 6. Support Nessie's POV**

I had been on many plane rides before, but this was the hardest one ever I think. If it wasn't then it was tied with my last one. It took 3 connecting flights to finally get to the Seattle airport. During the flights I kind of had a pattern going.

Think about Charlie and I would cry. Think about Jake and I would smile. Think about poor mom and I would cry. Think about being back in Forks brought another smile to my face. The other people on my flights probably thought I was by-polar with my mood swings but I really didn't care. All I cared about was getting to Forks.

I wanted to see and spend time with my grandfather. He was sick and I'm sure he needed help. He was strong though I knew that much. He may even make a full recovery with the help of Carlisle. I still didn't know any details. I only had the voicemails and I had made no attempt to contact them because I knew I had to be there in person.

I wanted to hold my mother so we could cry together. I wanted Jake to hold me in his embrace and whisper to me that everything would be okay. I wanted to hold my mother's hand as I went into the room where Charlie would be. After I was with Charlie for a while I would go and talk to my dad. I wanted to know why he left mom. I still don't know the whole story but I knew enough.

Right now though I was speeding down the road in the fastest car the rental place had. The guy who rented it to me so ripped me off but I didn't really care. I had run in and said I needed the fastest car they had and that I needed it now. They said it would at least be an hour, but that's when I told them money was not an object. Oh well it was well worth it and we have plenty to go around.

I was nearing the Forks city limit and I slowed the car. I decided to go to the old cottage to get some of my mom's old clothes. I was still in a tank and shorts so I looked way out of place.

When I finally arrived at the cottage I realized it didn't look the same that somehow it looked smaller. Well no duh, I thought, the last time I was here I was a kid, like a little kid. I didn't bother going through the house I went straight back to the window in my parents closet, opened it and slipped in. I went and found some of her jeans, a T-shirt, some shoes, and a hoodie.

If Alice saw me right now I'd be dead I thought to myself. Why didn't my mom have a better fashion since? I was so glad I was unlike her in that department. I didn't exactly enjoy wearing the outfit but I decided that I was so distraught that I didn't care.

I slipped back out the window and ran back to my car. Why couldn't there be a drive way to the cottage? Why was the only one miles long and it ran to the main house? I sighed. I had just arrived back at my rental and hopped in.

I drove through the thick undergrowth that was now the driveway. Finally after too long I was back on the road. I drove as fast as the car would let me and pulled into the hospitable parking lot a while later.

I jumped out of my car and ran inside and couldn't figure out for the life of me why I was running. I didn't understand but I did it anyway. As I was running towards the entrance I saw my dad's old Volvo and smiled slightly. They were here.

I went in the main entrance and was heading for the counter to find out where Charlie's room was when I heard my mother's voice.

"Nessie, Nessie come here," she yelled and I ran over to her and started to cry into her shoulder. She was sobbing too but no tears where coming.

I then heard my dad's voice, "Ness?" he said and then I went over to give him a tear-filled hug. After I was done hugging my father I hugged both my parents and said, "I'm so sorry for leaving. It was stupid. But... But..." I trailed off but dad finished for me.

"You had to," he stated and I nodded. Mom grabbed my chin and made me look at her. She said, "I'll let you slide this time, but don't you ever do that to me again," she said hugging me. When she let go my dad said, "Remember in public we aren't your parents. We are going to talk to Carlisle, Jacob is on the 4th floor waiting for you," he said and with that I was gone.

I ran to the elevator and got yelled at by a nurse and I thought, "Do I look like I care what you think?" I hit the number 4 on the elevator wall and waited. When the doors opened I saw another desk. There was an older lady working there and I actually _walked_ up to the desk.

"Hi. Um... Where is Charlie Swan's room?" I said. She told me the room number and the way and I started walking that way. Why was I so calm all of a sudden?

That is when I rounded a corner and saw Jake pacing at the end of the hall. "Jake!" I yelled and started running towards him. He looked up and a huge grin spread across his face. I was still running towards him and when I finally got to him I jumped up and wrapped my legs around his waist and started to kiss him.

He put his hands on my back as I placed mine on his face. The kiss was passionate and we both kept on deepening it. Our tongue where intertwined and I'm sure we had just looked like something out of a cheesy movie but I didn't care. We were still kissing but now I was on my own two feet against a wall. How did that happen I thought only to realize that once again I didn't care. That's when I heard someone clear their throat and I pulled away.

I looked up to see Carlisle there chuckling. "Don't I get a hug?" he asked.

"Of course you do," I answered hugging him tightly.

"We all missed you ya know," he said winking.

"Yea I know," I said leaning into Jake, "I'm so sorry I left like that. Just leaving a note but I had to ya know?"

"Yea I do," he responded.

"Good," I said smiling. He started to turn to go into I assumed Charlie's room. "Oh Carlisle," I said, "Kachiri, Zafrina, and Senna say 'Hello' and they wanted to let you know that they have 100% been sticking to their vegetarian lifestyle."

"So that's where you ran off to. Figures," he said.

"You didn't know?" I asked curious.

"I didn't," he replied, "I'm sure your father and Alice did but they where respecting your wishes. I smiled. "Well, I'm going to go take a look at Charlie," he said sadly. That's when I remembered why I was here.

I turned around and buried my face in Jacob's chest. He held me tight and close and murmured comforting things in my ear. I was so glad Jake was here and we could put this past week behind us. Eventually my crying began to lessen and I started to regain control over myself and my emotions.

When I finally looked back up I saw that my mom had more or less been doing what I had. She was seated in my dad's lap and crying into his neck. I don't think I've ever seen my dad look so helpless. He was trying comfort and consol mom as much as possible but she was still blaming herself. I didn't understand why. Strokes happen all the time and no one is responsible for them.

Carlisle came out then. Both my parents stood up and came over to Jake and me as we waited to hear what he had to say. "Charlie," he said, "wants to go home. I think it would help him to go home. I'll release him tomorrow. My dad looked at me and said, "Ness why don't you and Jake go grocery shopping and then spend the night at Charlie's to get things ready for him. We won't tell him and you can surprise him."

I just nodded. Jake and I walked to his car. I didn't want to ride in that rental. We rode to the store in silence but I found comfort just knowing he was there. We held hands and he rubbed his thumb in small, comforting circles over my skin. When we arrived at the grocery store I let Jake lead the way. He had grown up here and I never went out in public when I lived here.

I clung close to his side resting my head against his arm. He got a cart and pushed it while I got random ingredients. As I was walking a boy I didn't know goes, "Bella?" and walks over to wrap me in a hug. Why is Jake in the other isle I thought to myself. I started to push away and all of the sudden the boy let go. I looked over my shoulder and saw Jake rounding the corner some chips in his hand.

"I see you aren't with Cullen any more how long did that marriage last any way?" the boy said to me.

"What," I said confused.

"This is Renesmee not Bella. Renesmee is Bella's cousin. Her mom's twin sister daughter that is why they look similar. Bella and Edward are still married and they have a beautiful daughter Vanessa. Edward is a doctor just like his father so they are doing well," Jake said wrapping his arm around my waist. Then Jake turned to me, "That is Mike Newton one of Bella's old friends."

"Oh," I said.

"It was nice seeing you Jake," Mike said and Jake snorted, "Tell Bella I said hello."

"What about Edward," Jake asked.

"Oh. Yea. Him too I guess. Bye."

"Wait a minute. What's been going on in your life?" Jake asked smiling.

"Uh... Um..." Mike stuttered.

"Oh come on! It can't be that bad Newton tell us!"

"Um... Well I married Jessica we are getting a divorce so I had to move back in with my parents."

Jake looked like he was trying to hold back a laugh. Why? I thought. This poor guy's life sucked it sounded like. Jake pressed for more enough though, "Oh why are you getting a divorce?"

"Well... Jess wants kids and... Well... Uh... I... Um... Can't give that to her and I can't exactly hold a good job either and she is like a kick ass layer and she doesn't want to be with me anymore."

Poor guy I thought but Jake went on, "What about Angela and Ben. Bella lost their e-mail."

"They are doing well. Angela is a stay at home mom and been is writing a book but until it is published he works as a shrink. Makes good money. He is real good at it too! Or... Well... That's what I hear anyway. They twin girls and a new baby boy. Here," Mike said reaching into his back pocket pulling out his wallet. "I've had everyone's e-mail in here forever but I don't need them anymore. So give this to Bella for me."

He gave Jake a piece of paper with names, e-mail addresses, and phone numbers on it.

"Sure, sure," Jake said, "I'll give it to her. It was _real_ nice seeing you!" Jake said.

Once Mike was gone I hit Jake in the stomach. "You where _so_ mean to him," I said.

Jake laughed and said, "If you knew him you would get it."

We bought all the groceries and got in the car to go to Charlie's house. It hadn't changed since I was a little girl. Every single thing was the same except there being a few more pictures. Various ones of me even some pretty recent ones. They where pictures from where we live now taken' about a month ago.

One was a family picture of everybody. It was a goofy one. Alice was standing on Jasper's shoulders and he looked surprised, Emmett was holding Rosalie in his arms and she was posing for the camera, Carlisle was kissing Esme on the cheek and she was smiling, mom and dad where pretending to dance, and Jake was holding me upside down while I was laughing.

The others where a little more simple. There was a family one of me, mom, and dad. We were on the front porch steps sitting and smiling. You would never know they where my parents you would think we where siblings. The other was of me and Jake he was kissing me on the forehead and I was acting totally grossed out. At the time when the picture was taken' though I was wishing he would kiss me for real.

All the others where older. Different ones of me and my mom when we were younger and some from when she was human. My favorites of myself where pictures where I modeled for Alice in clothes. I really had a knack for it and I loved being in front of the camera.

I went into the kitchen and got things out to cock dinner for me and Jake. Jake helped me cock for a while a smile on his face the whole time. "What is it," I asked finally giving in as we ate.

"What," he looked up from his plate innocently.

"Why are you smiling like that?"

"Oh... Um... Well... I was just thinking it's almost, kind of like we are... ya know, married I guess? I don't know just forget it," he said.

I smiled, "Do you know how much I love you?"

"Well I know how much I love you."

"And how much is that?"

"More than anyone would ever think possible. More than any person who led an amazing wonderful life could think possible. Even if they had been happily married for years. It wouldn't, couldn't possibly add up to the happiness I feel every time I am around you. I love you more than I can even explain to you. If I could share my love with every person in the world I would still have so much love left that no normal person would know what to do with it."

My mouth had fallen open. I had always felt loved my whole life, but yet in this moment I felt more loved than I ever had. So much love for him and from him filled my heart. I got up from my seat and went to sit in his lap and I kissed him, and kissed him, and kissed him, and kissed him some more.

Eventually we pulled away gasping. I put my head on his shoulder. "I love you," I whispered. Jake kissed my forehead and whispered, "And I obviously love you." It was ten by now and I was tired and jetlagged so I got up to go get ready. I put on some of my mom's old P.J.s and went back down stairs to get Jake.

He was standing in the doorway to the living room. At the sound of my approach he turned around and he had a sad, painful looking expression on his face. "Jake what happened," I asked going over to hug him. He tried to block my view but I saw the living room anyway and gasped. Jake crushed me to his chest and was the support I needed.

The living room was a mess! It was obviously where Charlie had had his stroke. The coach pillows where all messed up and the coffee table pushed out. The rug was messed up and pictures that where on the table had fallen over.

I pushed away from Jake but took his hand we had to fix everything up. We entered the room and tears where streaming down my face. I fixed the coach, the rug, and put the coffee table into its proper place with Jake. Jake let go of my hand to go get something to put the glass from the picture frames in. When he was gone I picked up the pictures. One was of him and mom when she was about 6 years old. I cried harder. Another one was of my mom, dad, and Charlie on their wedding day. I cried harder. And the last one was of me and him when I was a baby.

I turned and sobbed into the couch I didn't know why I was crying so much. Charlie was going to be fine I thought to myself. It is just some pictures with some broken glass. Then I figured it out it represented how broken Charlie was. When we left Forks Sue left too. She went with Leah to Paris for a while. Leaving Charlie alone.

Sure he had Billy, work, friends, fishing, but in all honesty Sue probably broke his heart when she left. They were both slowly falling in love. I continued to sob into the couch but was suddenly lifted. Jake was taking me upstairs to my mom's old room. He set me down on the bed and was turning to leave.

"Where are you going?" I asked through the tears.

"Downstairs to sleep on the couch."

"No," I whispered, "I need you here with me. Stay please. Plus you shouldn't have to sleep on the couch."

"Are you sure?" he asked and I just nodded.

Jake came and slid under the covers with me. I laid my head on his chest still crying and weak. He wrapped his arm around me and held me tight. He told me the things I need to hear to make me strong again even though I still needed him I was able to control myself and drift into a soft sleep.


	7. Chapter 7 Perfect Not so much

**Chapter 7: Perfect... Not so much Nessie's POV**

I woke up to Jake rubbing my back in an effort to wake me up. Once I was fully awake but still laying on his chest he whispered, "You should probably call your parents." I got up and went to my mom's old closet. She had nothing to wear! Ugh! I found some jeans and went to Charlie's room. I was planning on getting one of his flannel shirts and tying it in the front but I saw that Charlie's bed wasn't made.

When I had changed and made Charlie's bed I went down stairs to call my parents. I wasn't sure if my dad would exactly approve of my outfit but I knew Alice would be proud of me for making the best of what I had. With Charlie's shirt tied up and the buttons not buttoned at all really well it showed my whole stomach showed and there was also some cleavage. I did look good in it though if I do say so myself.

My stomach was perfectly toned and flat. My boobs where large I guess, but they weren't over kill. A C cup but I was still growing. My butt was perfectly round and perky and it looked amazing in skinny jeans and tight dresses. Hell my back was even amazing and I had never had a blemish on my body and I didn't expect to get one any time soon.

It was 10:00 A.M. I must really have been jetlagged. Either that or I was just really emotionally drained. It was time to call my parents. I dialed my dad's cell and waited.

"Hey baby," my mom answered.

"Mom," I asked.

"Yeah it's me. My phone is dead so I have your dad's on me. You calling to ask when we'll be home I guess."

"Yup. Is Alice there? Did she tell you?"

"No Alice here. She should be at the house in about 5 minutes though. She is going to surprise Charlie too because Charlie loves Alice. My guess is that he still likes her more than your dad." I chuckled. Everybody loves Alice.

"Okay so when will you be here," I asked. As I asked Jake came behind me wrapping his arms around my waist and kissing my cheek. I smiled as he did this and I think my mom heard it in my voice because she laughed before she answered.

"Around 12. Have Charlie some lunch okay he'll need it. Something healthy."

My throat was heavy as I asked my next question, "Mom, is he going to be okay?"

"Yes," she breathed, "Carlisle said he will make a full recovery." I could hear the smile in her voice and I sighed in relief, then Jake held his hand out for the phone.

"Um... Mom. I think Jake wants to talk to you," I said and handed the phone to him.

"Hey Bells," Jake said, "Let me talk to Edward okay?"

It was a couple seconds before I heard my dad's voice on the other line.

"Guess who me and Ness saw yesterday," Jake exclaimed.

"Who," I heard my dad ask.

"Mike Newton! He was hugging Ness while I wasn't in sight. Well I came back and he looked scared to death. Guy thought she was Bella and said guess it didn't last with Cullen after all or something like that. Well anyway I made a cover story for her and all too happily told him Bells was still happily married, had a kid and you had a wonderful job as a doctor!"

I could hear my dad laughing on the other end. "That's not the best part though. He had got married to Jessica Stanley. Yea she is leaving him and she is some big hot shot lawyer! It was so funny plus Angela and Ben are doing great I could just see his self esteem drop like 10 points talking to me! It was so funny," Jake said starting to laugh at the memory.

I thought it was so mean! This poor guy! Apparently dad didn't like him either because he was historically laughing on the other end. I could just picture him doubled over in laughter. All the sudden my mom was on the line.

"Jacob Black you are horrible," my mom said but it sound like she was having a hard time not laughing too. "Both of you are," she said away from the phone and then added, "Renesmee, I'm sure you can hear me I'm about to hang up Alice should be there soon. Love you." With that the line went dead and I heard a knock at the door.

"Come in Alice," I yelled over my shoulder and then I hit Jake on the shoulder.

"What was that for," he asked innocently.

"For being so mean," I said then Alice walked in.

"That is to funny Jake. Even though I knew the direction his life was headed and she laughed with him.

"Not you too," I moaned.

"Sorry sweetie, but you didn't know him."

"That's what I said," Jake yelled and then all of the sudden I was in Alice's arms.

She was giving me a huge hug, when she pulled away she scolded me like a little child. That's when I remembered what I had done. "Don't you ever, EVER do that to me ever again do you hear me? It took me forever to figure out where you where! Do you know how hard it is to search for things to disappear? I wasn't going to actually go after you but I needed to know you where in a safe place," she yelled.

"I'm sorry Alice! I really am I had to. I really am sorry though," I pleaded.

"I know you are," she said, "and I'm proud of you for working with what you have. Your mom would have never thought to wear Charlie's shirt like that. I'm proud of you," she finished talking and kissed me on the forehead.

"Thanks," I laughed, "Mom had like no old clothes to wear that where cute... Yesterday I had to wear jeans and a t-shirt! Ugh!"

"NO," she exclaimed.

"YES," I said.

"I'm so sorry," she yelled.

"It's okay because at the time I was really upset so I didn't notice _as_ much."

We gossiped and talked and eventually Jake left the room to go watch TV. Alice helped me start Charlie's lunch around 11:30. We were making grilled chicken and salad for him. We were also making some baked potatoes and would ask Carlisle if he could eat those, but Jake and I would.

"Five minutes," Alice announced as we where fixing up the last few things for Charlie.

"Where should we wait," I asked.

"Um... Well since you have the food set out for Charlie I think you should wait at the table with your food. I can open the door. Oh...," Alice said surprised. "How did I miss that," she asked herself.

"What happened Alice," I asked her shaking her shoulder.

She sighed, "You need to set out another plate. Billy is coming."

"My dad," Jake asked.

"Yes your dad and Sue won't be here until about five and she'll eat before so you should be good on food."

"Alice you scared me," I said.

"Oh sorry, it happens," she laughed and then there was the sound of tires hitting the drive way. "Its show time," Alice added and left to go get the door.

I quickly made another plate of food then sat down across from Jake. Grandpa Charlie could have the head of the table and Billy could just roll up anywhere he wanted. I heard the door open then Charlie say, "Alice sweetheart I didn't know you where here. Bella, Edward, and Carlisle just keep surprising me. I've missed you!"

"Awh, I've missed you too Charlie," Alice sang, "And us Cullen's are just full of surprises. Who knows there could be more to come," she laughed and I could hear everyone else including myself and Jake laughing with her.

"What's so funny," Charlie asked as he rounded the corner. "Oh," he breathed looking shocked. "Hey Jacob. Renesmee that can't be you is it? You're so grown up!"

"It's me," I said getting up to go hug him. He hugged me back with more force than I expected. He was happy to see me.

"I just can't believe it! I remember when you where just a little baby girl. So cute, and well now," he turned to mom and dad, "Bet you guys have to keep a bat at the front door to keep the guys away."

Daddy chuckled, "Actually," he started but I finished, "I kind of have a boyfriend."

"That your dad approves of," Charlie questioned.

"I think he approves of me," Jake said wrapping his arm around my waist and I laid my head on his chest for affect, "don't you Edward," Jake continued.

"I guess," My dad said, "My only problem with you is how you smell," my dad joked and everyone laughed except Charlie.

"Really Edward? I mean... Huh?"

"Really Charlie," my dad said, "I trust him, he's like my brother. Don't get me wrong, I mean I have my moments where I dislike him because he does date my daughter, but really all in all he's a good man Charlie," my dad spoke sincerely.

"Wow. Well that's, ugh something. A surprise really. Wow. Well you know I like you Jake," my grandfather said winking and both my parents and Jake laughed. I didn't get it.

Just then Billy Black rolled in. "Why are we all just standing here? I smell food let's eat," he said laughing. Then he saw Jake, "Come here and give your old dad a hug."

I had fun at Charlie's. It was midnight and we were on the road driving back home we had left about thirty minutes ago. Sue had showed up around five like Alice had said. As much as I wanted to spend time with Charlie I found myself talking to Billy a lot.

I wanted to really get to know him and found that I liked him a lot and hopefully he would be my father-in-law one day. As Charlie talked to Sue and everybody I talked to Billy. We laughed, we were serious, and we even cried once. He told me about his late wife Sarah and how he wished she was still here.

He wanted her to see what an amazing man Jake had become and the amazing women Rebecca and Rachel were. He wanted her to be able to be here physically. He said he knew she was watching over them but he has to some degree gotten over blaming himself.

He had said, "It was so hard at first. I kept blaming myself. I would say, 'If you just would have done what she had asked, but no you where lazy! You where an idiot and you caused your wife and the mother of your children to die! You are now wifeless and your children are mother less! Aren't you glad you stayed home?' Then I stopped.

"I had to be strong for my children. They had to know that their mommy was watching them and that I loved them. It was bad luck and bad timing. I told them God has a reason for everything and he does. I told them it was okay to be mad and ask why it is to be expected. I also told them that life goes on.

"Your life can't stop. My life couldn't stop. Just because I was in pain and grieving the loss of my wife doesn't mean I could just stop my life. I had three growing children to take care of. Did I want to raise them by myself? No, but I did anyway. Did I want to have to be strong all the time and not cry? No, but I had to for my children.

"I think we all came out better for it, stronger. All of my children are strong. This is a good thing. Sure they had to learn how to be strong in a horrible situation but in a way it is almost what they needed. Especially Jake. He needed it most. He is a werewolf for crying out loud! He lives with vampires and he protects the one he loves. He has seen and I'm sure he will see more than any normal human ever should and I'm glad he has you."

I smiled at the memory. Before the night was over I promised Billy that at my wedding that I would one day have he would have a special dance with me. I really meant it too. I loved Billy not as a father but as a father in-law. No one could replace my dad but Billy was really a great man that had been through more than he should have been through.

I was laying in the backseat new tears streaming down my face, happy ones. "Sleep Renesmee," Jake said from the front seat followed by an 'OW'.

Alice who was in the passenger seat had slapped him, "Let her do what she wants," she said.

"Alice its fine really I'm tired," I said laughing. I rolled over and turned my face into the cushions to sleep.

All of the sudden Alice gasped. She was over me covering my head and I couldn't see. I heard a car coming way to fast from a strange direction. I heard the tears squeal and then I heard the crash. Something crushed my left leg and my left arm got thrown into a weird possession. It all happened so fast that at first I didn't feel the pain.

Then I screamed bloody murder. I could hear several others calling my name but was in too much pain to respond. All that could come out of my mouth where shrilling screams. Then everything went black.


	8. Chapter 8 Awake and Asleep

**Chapter 8: Wasn't expecting that... Nessie's POV**

My eyes opened I noticed that it was about six p.m. or around that time. I knew I was in the hospitable, but I didn't know where. I could hear the machines beeping and could feel the needles sticking into my arm. I could also feel the horrible pain in my arm and leg.

It was throbbing badly, but I could handle that. What I couldn't handle was the pain that would suddenly hit every time the blood would circulate in certain spots. My guess is where my bones where broke. I wasn't a doctor but I knew more than any non-doctor knew. The blood hit a certain spot in my leg and I had a sharp intake of breathe.

"Oh thank God," Jake said.

"Jake," I sighed.

"It's okay," he murmured, smoothing my hair back, "I'm here honey, I'm here."

"It hurts Jake."

"I know. I'm so, so sorry. I tried to get out of the way for him not to hit us! He came out of nowhere though. Alice saw it. That's why she jumped back there," he was starting to get worked up but then he whispered, "If Alice wouldn't have been in that car," he was shaking his head like he couldn't believe it, "if she would have rode with Carlisle and your parents... Renesmee you wouldn't be here."

A few tears spilled over his eyelids onto his cheeks and mine started to tear up at his pain and mine. "She saw," he started tripping over his words, "she saw your skull being cru- cru- crushed. She jumped back there and covered your head. She saved your life," he was crying now and so was I.

"She saved us all. We would have been lost without you. I don't think I would have survived. I would've blamed it all on myself. I already blame your arm and leg on me, but just... The thought... Of, of you being... Gone..."

He stopped there because a sob had broken through my chest. The look on his face broke my heart. "Oh Jake," I sobbed, "It's okay! I'm fine! Don't think like that! Please, please it's killing me Jake."

"Shhh, Sweetie. Shhh. I'll stop, I'm sorry. You didn't need to hear that," he said stroking my face. I took my right hand and put it on his face and he left his hands cradling my face. I showed him images of me happy, smiling, and laughing. We just stared at each other for a long time. Then I tried to turn a little and gasped in pain.

"What is it? What is it," he asked.

"Just...My leg," I panted.

"Do you want to sit up?"

"Please," I said. He gently lifted me up into a sitting position. He handled me like I was a delicate flower. "Where is every one," I questioned.

"Your dad is coming in now."

"Renesmee sweetie how are you honey." my dad asked coming in the door and kissing me on my forehead.

"Okay. I guess except for when the blood passes through certain points. Where's mom at?"

"She's afraid to come in. Afraid she'll break down in front of you. She doesn't want to seem weak in your eyes I think. It's hard for us all and when I see Carlisle I'll let him know."

"I'm sorry, but go get her. I want to see her. If it hurts, I'll hide it. Promise."

"Are you sure," my dad asked seriously and I nodded.

He gracefully left the room and I turned to Jake, "Jake hold my hand please," I begged. He took my hand and kissed it.

"I love you," he breathed.

"I love you too Jake. No matter what."

He was about to say something else but the door cracked open and my mom's head popped in. "Can I come in," she asked.

"Yes mom," I said rolling my eyes trying to make her feel better. She opened the door to come in and my dad was right behind her. She went and kneeled next to my hurt side.

"How you holding up," she asked.

"Alright," I said trying to sit up some more but I gave up on that quickly. Pain shot through my left side and I squeezed Jake's hand really hard but kept a perfect smile on my face. The perfect actress.

"You sure," my mom continued.

"Sure, sure."

"Nope you're in pain you answered to quick. I may be a vampire but I was human about 6 years ago so," she trailed off. She was right though. I was in pain, because as she was talking another spasm of pain had coursed through my left side again and I gripped Jake's hand tight.

"So what," I asked then continued, "in case you haven't noticed I'm not human. I'm," pain, squeeze Jake's hand, "half vampire for crying out loud."

"True," she laughed as more pain came and I clutched onto Jake's hand some more.

"_Dad_," I screamed mentally, "_Dad I'm about to hit the edge. I'm goanna brake. Get her out of here._"

"Bella," my dad said, "lets go get Carlisle and let Renesmee sleep,"

"Alright," my mom sighed getting up and kissing my cheek, "Love you sweetie."

"Love you too mom, see ya later," I said and when she turned I mouthed a 'Thanks dad' to my dad and he winked. Moments later Carlisle walked in.

"I already know. Anything you thought or said I know. You should be fully healed in a week. You heal fast like a werewolf but with your senses being so good you feel the pain more. I'm going to give you something to make you sleep see you in a week," he smiled coming over to kiss my forehead and then putting something into the i.v. bag.

"Thanks Carlisle," I murmured.

"Your welcome," he smiled and left the room.

"Renesmee," Jake said, "I love you and I'll be here the next time you wake up I promise baby."

"I love you," I whispered.

"More than my own life," he said.

I could feel the sleep coming. It reminded me of when Uncle Jasper would send strong waves of calm. Before I could go completely under I felt his lips press to mine and they responded as eagerly as possible. Then he pulled away and I was out.

As I slept I dreamed. Some reminded me of the ones my mom used to have. She would tell me about them as bedtime stories when I was younger. Then there was a strange one. It was the first one I had, so I wasn't completely sure it was a dream.

I dreamed I was lying in a small bed in Jake's arms. My eyes were closed and I never opened them. I could only hear things and feel them. I didn't know where I was in the dream. I knew I was happy in Jake's arms then I heard him say.

"Do you remember that night in the tent? The day before the newborns came. You let me into your head." What was he talking about? What newborns? My mom was the only newborn vampire I'd ever known. What was he talking about? Then I heard my dad chuckle.

"Yea, I remember. Things have really changed since then."

"For the better," Jake agreed tightening his hold on me. "So I was wondering..."

"Sure. You can pick through my head again. I don't mind, and this time we aren't going off a truce but a friendship," I could hear the smile in my dad's voice.

"What's it like? Having your one and only daughter dating me?"

My dad sighed, "Sometimes it's annoying. Almost like why is it always the girls I love? The ones who are mine. Well, that's how it was in the beginning. Now though it's not so bad. Jake even when it wasn't my daughter you loved it was Bella I knew you were a good man Jacob, and I still think you are.

"I know you can take care of her Jake. You are good for her and your are connected like I'm connected to Bella, Carlisle to Esme, Jasper to Alice, and Emmett to Rosalie. It's hard sometimes, she is my baby girl Jacob. The only daughter I'll ever have.

"What makes it easier is knowing that every now and then she may go on her own for maybe a year or something like that. She'll always be around, and you'll always be around for her. Always. That is comforting. You two were made for each other and I can't deny that.

"Another thing that made it easier is not fighting it and letting her desire what she desired. It was her choice, not mine. Sure I could have fought it and made it harder for everyone around, but that would make it harder on me too.

"You made it easier too. You know. You can control your thoughts and you only want what's best for her. I'm thankful you where here when she woke up. You helped her stay strong for her mother even when you yourself where weak with guilt. I'm thankful for you Jacob as a friend, brother, and son."

"Thank you Edward," you could hear the sincerity of his words as he spoke, "and I'm so, so sorry for what happened I tried to get out of the way. I didn't know if I should jump back there or try and get out of the way or what I should do. I'm really, really," he stopped because my dad said something.

"Don't say sorry. It was NOT your fault! You saved her as much as Alice. You pulled the car into a position where it would hit her leg not her head. Even with Alice there it would have thrown her some. She would have survived but with a broken neck.

"You saved her Jacob not just Alice both of you. If you would have jumped back there, Jake," my dad stuttered, "She would have broke her neck and other body parts but she would have lost you too Jacob. You would have died and she would have died inside. I don't know what she would have done, but I know whatever would have happened would have been bad.

"You saw what happened to Bella when I left. Jake you've seen it. The difference would be Bella knew I was alive somewhere. She thought I was happy where ever I was even though I wasn't.

"Could you imagine what would have happened to Renesmee if you had died? Eventually Carlisle could fix her neck and her bones would heal, but without you here. If you where with your mother Jacob. It WOULD kill her.

"You did EVERYTHING right. You saved her in so many ways Jacob. I really do owe you for a lot. Taking care of Bella when I didn't saving my only daughter in every way imaginable. That is another reason I've been so easy going about this. About you and her. I owe you my life Jacob," my dad finished.

I felt Jacob kiss my hair and his hold on me tighten. "So for that split second when I thought I lost her. That moment of horror did you hear my thoughts? Did you kind of feel what I was feeling?"

"Yes."

"That was the scariest hardest moment of my life. I don't know how you went through a whole 24 hours thinking Bella was dead."

"Why do you think I was trying to kill myself that whole 24 hours, or you know get myself killed?"

"I get it, I understand," Jake said rubbing my shoulder.

There was silence for a couple minutes and I thought my dream was over then I heard my dad speak. "You have my permission and my blessing."

"Thank you," Jake breathed, "Do you think it'll be too soon?"

"For any normal person absolutely, but not for you two. She likes things to move fast. I think it's because she grew up so fast. Sure you haven't exactly been dating but for about...Hmm... Two days," he laughed, "but the answer would have been the same a month ago Jake. It doesn't matter if it is now or in a year but she'd be pretty pissed if it's in a year," they both chuckled.

"Your right for her and I can't deny that. If I said no it would just make both of you angry, but I'm glad it is you Jake because I would probably kill any other boy who walked through my front door. You better be glad I know you so well," he laughed.

"Thanks again Edward. You have been way nicer than I ever disserved. Sorry for always stealing your women," Jake joked.

"At least it's you stealing them," my dad joked with him. "I'm going to go with Bella. We are going to do Nessie's three weeks of work for her actually we are doing everybody's work," he laughed.

"Goodnight Jacob."

"Goodnight Edward. Thanks."

After that I feel into a deep sleep. One that was never interrupted again. All of my other dreams where mostly of memories.


	9. Chapter 9 Didn't see that Coming

Chapter 9. Didn't see that coming... Nessie's POV

I woke up and I had no idea what day it was. Nobody was in the room and the sun was coming in the window from above. Twelve? I went to sit up and noticed that I wasn't in any pain anymore and I could move my leg and arm.

"Oh," I said. Moments later Carlisle walked in.

"Jake will be very upset with me," he said.

"Why," I asked curious.

"Because I told him to go change and promised you wouldn't wake up."

"Oh, that's nothing. I'll fake it," I said winking at him and laid back down the way I was closing my eyes. I waited for about a minute before I heard Jake's voice outside my door.

"She still asleep," I heard him ask.

"Yea," my dad said. "Hasn't woke yet but she should any second now."

"Twenty to be exact," I heard Alice chime in. Those liars I thought and heard my dad laugh.

Jake came in and sat next to my bed. That took him about ten seconds. He sat there for about five before taking my hand. Then I started to stir in my "sleep" for five seconds.

I opened my eyes to Jacob and I saw his breath taking smile stretch across his face and I'm sure by answering smile was just as bright.

"Hi," I said.

"Hi."

"What day is it?"

"Uh. Let's see. The last time you where at home was a Thursday or would you count it as Friday?"

"Friday," I said.

"Okay. So Friday. April 21st. Then you where gone for a week and you didn't get to Forks until April 29th. It was Monday May 1st when you woke up here. Then you slept so it's Friday May 12th, 2017."

"What?"

"Don't worry about school work. It's taken care of."

"I'm not, it's just, wow. I slept that long?"

"Well not by yourself. Carlisle gave you medicine to sleep until he was sure you were fully healed. He made a deal with the people here that he'd work free for however long you had to stay as long as he was the only one to take care of you. You'll have to wear a fake cast out of the hospitable but as soon as we are gone you can take it off."

"What's the cover story back home?"

"You went to visit family. Then the rest of us came too. Simple. People won't need more than that."

"Oh," I said, "and it won't be weird that the other stayed home?"

"People shouldn't press too much. Just say they didn't want to come. Easy."

"My friends will press for all the info they can get. They've all been assuming I go out with you so we won't have to worry about our all-the-sudden stuff."

"Mhmm," he murmured skimming his lips across my cheek. "So tonight I'm taking you out."

"Where are we going?"

"I'm not telling," he winked.

"Then how will I know what to wear," I started to panic.

"Don't worry," he said, "I have the best working on that," he grinned.

"Alice?"

"Yup, she just left. She custom ordered what you are going to wear and is on her way to pick you up. She'll be at the house waiting."

"Will I get to spend any time with my family?"

"No, they won't be there. Alice is going to make them go hunting so you won't be distracted and stop to talk. We don't need to be late tonight we could miss a lot!"

"Oh... Do I at least get a hint," I asked.

"Hmmm. Dinner. That is your hint," he laughed.

"Thanks so much," I rolled my eyes.

"I promise it'll be better as a surprise. I promise."

"I trust you," I whispered then there was a knock on the door.

"Time for you to get ready to leave," she smiled and so did I. I couldn't wait to get out of this place!

My mom helped me get dressed because my whole left side was supposed to be broken. There were only so many options due to the stupid cast I had to wear. I told my mom to screw the winter crap that I wasn't even going to bother it may be chilly but I was going to wear what I wanted.

People could look at me weird if they wanted to. I didn't care. I ended up in a black jumper with details all over it. Since the fake leg cast came up to my thigh it worked. Since the jumper was strapless that worked with the cast that freaking came up past my elbow. My elbow!

I was soooo glad I didn't _actually_ have to wear it for a long period. I couldn't wear heals so I wore some cute, frilly, and girly red gladiator sandals that matched the red detail on the jumper. Throw in a headband with a red bow and my look was complete.

"Mom do you know where Jake is taking me," I asked as I did my makeup.

"I wish I did," she exclaimed, "Alice and your dad know but they won't tell me! It is so frustrating! Jake won't tell me either! I mean you _are_ my daughter I have the right to know!"

"Imagine how I feel," I complained, "it is about me and _I_ don't even now! Jake said it would be better as a surprise so I trust him but I still want to know."

"Yea if he says it'll be better that way than it'll be better that way. That's the way your dad always did things. Why do you think I went to prom?" she laughed.

"When is prom anyway," I asked.

"Next weekend maybe or tomorrow. Not sure. So many schools I get them mixed up!"

"It's my first time through so I want to go! I'm sure Alice has me a dress!"

"I'm sure she does to," she said fixing my hair and kissing my temple, "I'll be waiting in the car with your dad. Jake is rolling you out and Carlisle is signing some papers now."

"Alright," I said.

I put on a few pieces of jewelry then called Jake's name. Just seconds after I said his name he was opening the door. "You ready," he asked.

"Yup," I smiled as he rolled me out to the car. I was in the passenger seat next to Jake because to my dad's dismay Jake was driving. He was too big to sit in the backseat with 2 other people so he got to be up front with me. He shifted the car into its proper gear and we hit the road.

I'm not sure how long it took to get home because I feel asleep again. When we got home there was an unfamiliar car in the drive way which I assumed to be a rental Alice had gotten. As soon as the car stopped Alice ran out.

"Oh thank God you are FINALLY here it took you FOREVER! Ugh! What if I can't redo your makeup," she went on pulling me out of the car. I had already got rid of the casts so there was nothing slowing Alice tugging me along.

"Nessie would you walk faster please," she begged and quickened my pace.

"What's the big rush," I asked, and knew I made a mistake. We were in the hall next to her and Jasper's room. She stopped me and looked at me firmly before chewing me out.

"What's the big rush? Really? What's the big rush? The big rush is I don't want you to be late that's the big rush Renesmee Cullen and so help me if you won't let me get what I need to get done, done then you will have to put up with me miss!"

"Alright, alright," I said opening her door and going straight for her connecting bathroom. I walked in and saw what I was going to be wearing and all the supplies on her counter and my jaw dropped.

Alice had spent an hour working on me and I was now dressed and ready. I was wearing a dark blue dress, but this dress was unbelievable and looked amazing on my body. The silk in the front was tight around my thighs, hips, and middle. It was a little loser up top, so the neckline was kind of draped and showed off just enough cleavage to be sexy but not slutty. Then there was the back!

A silver chain connected to the front on each side and went over each shoulder and ended a little under my boob. When I say this dress was backless I mean that there was absolutely nothing there except for those chains.

When they're finally was a back again it was loose right over my ass. I was then very tight and short underneath. About three inches of fabric going around my thighs. If we went dancing I was going to have to be _very_ careful, but I looked so, so hot? Sexy? Amazing? Wonderful? I don't know I wasn't trying to be vain but, Alice wasn't helping any.

She had curled my hair and it was now all placed on the top of my head. Not sloppy or sophisticated. Young, mature a smart sexy adult kind of hair maybe. It was hard to say. Alice had given me a smoky eye which made me look kind of mysterious and uncontrollable. Add some mascara, eyeliner, blush, and amazing red lipstick and I was everything a guy could dream of! Not to mention the 4 inch stilettos I was wearing and I would still be shorter than Jake.

I was waiting for Alice to call me down stairs she had went to make sure he had found the outfit she had picked out for him and that he looked presentable. All the waiting was driving me absolutely crazy! I was already pacing back and forth in Alice's bedroom.

She hated me just calling her Alice instead of Aunt Alice but all my aunts and uncles hated me taking off the relation to them when I said there name. It wasn't _my_ fault I had gotten in the habit when I started school. My train of thought was lost when I heard Alice yell, "Okay Ness, You can come down now!"

After working up enough courage I opened Alice's door and stepped into the hallway making my way to the stairs. I could hear someone pacing downstairs and was guessing it was either dad or Jake. My money was on Jake. When I reached the stairs and was in sight of everyone I heard Jake's intake of breath.

He was standing in the middle of the living room mid-step from the pacing he was doing. He was staring at me and then our eyes locked and I smiled and blushed at the same time. My mom's mouth was hanging open and my dad's face was nervous, worried maybe. No he was expecting something, but I didn't know what. I could tell this wasn't his favorite outfit for his daughter to wear but _technically_ I was covered.

Alice's smile was dazzling as she appraised her work on what both Jake and I were wearing. Jake was in black pants, a baby blue button down, and a skinny black tie. So we were obviously going somewhere nice but were where we going, that was the question.

When I reached the bottom of the stairs Jake took my hand and said, "Ready to go?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," we tried to make a quick escape but not before Alice could stop us to take a few pictures. When we were finally in the car I asked, "So where are we going?"

"Well," he said calmly, "I know how much you've wanted to see the symphony so Carlisle pulled a few strings to get us some tickets."

"Are you serious," I squealed in delight. I had been dying to see the symphony because they were supposed to be beyond amazing.

Jake continued, "That's not all though."

"There's more," I asked curious.

"Yup. Since this is a special performance and they are not only doing their music but a bunch of dead guys too they are holding a dinner and dance afterwards.

I was beaming, "I love you so much Jake," I said leaning over to kiss his cheek. Thank God this lipstick doesn't smear!

"I love you too but can you promise me something," he asked starting to chuckle.

"Anything," I promised.

"Just make sure I _don't_ fall asleep and get mugged by a bunch of symphony freaks," he laughed.

"Okay," I said laughing with him, "but if I forget and they start beating you up I'm just goanna have to close my eyes cause there is no way I can take on a bunch of symphony freaks," I laughed using his term.

"That works," he said smiling.

The symphony was amazing! They really where the best around! When they had plaid the classics they didn't just play the classics they had redone them and made them even better! All together, like I said, amazing!

We had just finished eating and I was on the dance floor with Jake. We owned the dance floor dancing to Ashley Tisdale's "Be good to Me." A circle had once again formed around us and I felt like the luckiest girl in the world. When the song ended the crowd all started to dance with thee partners to the Lifehouse song, "You and Me."

_What day is it? And in what month?_

_This clock never seemed so alive_

_I can't keep up and I can't back down_

_I've been losing so much time_

Jake and I were dancing close my arms wrapped around his neck with my head resting on his chest just spinning in small, simple circles.

_Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do_

_Nothing to lose_

_And it's you and me and all of the people_

_And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you_

_All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right_

_I'm tripping on words_

_You've got my head spinning_

_I don't know where to go from here_

_Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do_

_Nothing to prove_

_And it's you and me and all of the people_

_And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you_

Jake started to move closer to the door as we were dancing, spinning as we went. Why were we going to the door? And the back door at that.

_There's something about you now_

_I can't quite figure out_

_Everything she does is beautiful_

_Everything she does is right_

Just as the song reached the last chorus we were at the door and he opened it still holding me close. With one spin we were outside in an amazing garden. Roses were everywhere along with other flowers. It was dark outside but there was light coming from a white gazebo. We spun that way and finished the song which was barely audible to normal people under the gazebo.

_Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do_

_Nothing to lose_

_And it's you and me and all of the people_

_And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you_

_And me and all of the people with nothing to do_

_Nothing to prove_

_And it's you and me and all of the people_

_And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you_

_What day is it?_

_And in what month?_

_This clock never seemed so alive _

When we stopped spinning I looked up at him smiling. He lifted one of his hands off my back and brushed it across my cheek. "Renesmee," he whispered as he did that and a chill went down my spine, a good one. Then he kissed me on the forehead and got down on one knee.

My hands flew to my mouth as I gasped. I couldn't believe it! He was going to propose! No wonder Aunt Alice had dressed me up like this she knew. As I stood there in shock Jake pulled out a little black box and opened it.

The ring was defiantly perfect for me. It had a skinny white gold band with 5 square diamonds on it. The biggest was in the middle, to pretty good ones on either side of that one, and a small one on each end. It wasn't flashy, but it wasn't boring. It was different but amazing. I lost all train of thought when he began to speak.

"Renesmee Carlie Cullen I could never love anyone or anything more than I love you. You have changed my life in so many ways but all were for the better. My life would be absolutely nothing without you Renesmee. I want to say so much more, but I'll finish with this.

"Would you please be my wife? I want to kiss you and tell you how much you mean to me every day and wake up every morning with you next to me. I want to try and make you the happiest woman in the world each and every second. So will you please do me the amazing honor? Renesmee, will you marry me?"

I was so amazingly happy I wanted to scream 'Of course I will you idiot' and then laugh with him. I didn't do that though. This moment was to special and sweet to say any of the funnier things I was thinking. This isn't the moment to laugh, not quite yet. So I made the moment perfect.

"Yes," I whispered simply. A huge grin spread across his face and I smiled back. The perfect moment. He placed the ring on the third finger on my left hand. As he stood back up he picked me up and spun me around hugging me. My trilling joy filled laugh filled the air.

Perfect.


	10. Chapter 10 Family

**Chapter 10. Family Nessie's POV**

Jake and I were in the car on the way back home. Neither of us had stopped smiling. We started talking about when we wanted the wedding, where we wanted the wedding and everything after the wedding.

I was getting married and I couldn't believe it. I was so incredibly happy. Things moved fast but that was the way I liked it. Mrs. Black, oh how I loved the sound of that! Renesmee Black would be married to Jacob Black and we would live in the south.

After a long debate in the car I had finally convinced him that one year wouldn't kill my parents. We could go to Vanderbilt in Tennessee. I was already accepted and so was Jake. We could have our own home, even a farm if we wanted to and if I ever wanted any grizzly, it was what, and a four hour drive to the Smokey Mountains from Nashville. It would be faster for us because of how fast we drive.

It made since in my head. After our honeymoon we'd come back for a week and then leave for Nashville, or a town near there. After the thousand year flood that hit their Nashville had come back better than ever from what I had heard but I still wanted to live in the country so somewhere in the outskirts for sure.

Only a year there. Maybe, maybe two and that all depended on my family's choice on where they were moving and what they were doing. I loved living with my family but I would want to live on my own for a little bit with my future husband. I wanted to be a little normal and normal people don't live at home after they are married. Just for a year I thought. Just a year, I could be normal.

We had arrived at home and Jake was getting out coming open my door for me. I could hear that everyone was home and was suddenly a little nervous because I had no idea how they would react, especially Aunty Rosalie. She eventually started to get along with Jake and he now gets along with her, but I know she still didn't want me to end up with him.

She hadn't even seen us together as a couple yet and I was coming home after about two weeks engaged! I was sure only Aunt Alice and daddy would know and that they wouldn't tell anyone. The Cullen's equal surprises. When we reached the door Jake squeezed my hand and then went to open the door.

He was to slow though because the door swung open and Alice stood there with a huge grin spread across her face. She picked up my left hand and looked at the ring with her eyes and smile growing bigger. She dropped my hand before anyone could notice and danced back inside to sit next to Jasper.

Jake and I walked into the living room where Jasper was eyeing me. My guess was that he could tell how nervous and excited I was. I held my hand so that nobody could see my ring, yet.

"There's my favorite niece," I heard Emmett exclaimed from the top of the stairs.

"I'm your only niece," I reminded him giving him a huge hug then I heard my mom.

"Oh my gosh, Nessie!" She was frozen in the kitchen doorway her eyes locked on my finger my dad was smiling behind her his hands winding around her waist.

I sighed everyone was in the living room now but only my mom had noticed, probably because they were all too busy starring at her to look at me. Jake already had his arms wound around me so I rested my head on his chest putting my left hand on there as well.

All of the sudden my dad started laughing and I'm sure it was at me and how frustrated I was getting. I mean no one was looking at Jake and I and I was just flaunting the ring around right under their noses. I mean come on! My mom though kept the attention when she turned around and smacked my dad on the shoulder.

"Ow," he yelled, "What was that for?"

"You knew," she screamed and he flashed his famous crocked grin to keep himself out of trouble. He didn't have to worry about it long though because Alice was laughing next to Jasper.

"Of course he knew and so did I! I mean did you honestly think Jake wouldn't ask him," Alice laughed.

"ALICE," my mom screamed, "You kept it from me too!"

"Well duh, it's so much more fun this way," Alice laughed. Everybody else was looking at my mom like she was crazy. I thought about saying something or even clearing my throat but this was just too funny! Oh how I love my family! My dad smiled at my thought.

"Why all the secrets," my mom questioned, "Would one of you please enlighten me!"

Both dad and Aunt Alice shrugged looking unashamed Jake and I both chuckled, but then my mom turned on Jake.

"And you Jacob Black," she said scolding him like a child, "I thought I was your friend your _best_ friend at that how could you not tell me something like this! How?"

Jake couldn't answer because Rosalie had noticed my ring, "Renesmee Carlie Cullen," she yelled, "How come you didn't come to me right as you walked in that door to tell me!

"Instead you make all of us watch your dad and Alice pick on your mom and just wait for everyone to notice! How could you do that to me? It is so mean," she said stamping her foot.

"Oh get a grip Blondie," Jake laughed and I smacked his chest but kept my hand there after I hit it because surely that would get my hand some attention!

Aunt Rose growled at Jake, "You should have told me," she said flipping her hair and crossing her arms.

"I'm sorry Rose," he said rolling his eyes.

"Whatever," she said not looking at them then she took a step towards me, "We will talk about this later," she scolded me and then she smiled. She ran up kissing me and Jake on our cheeks gave us both a hug at the same time blocking everyone's view of my ring and whispered, "Congratulations you two," before running upstairs and calling Uncle Emmett after her.

He grumbled and followed her upstairs. We were all quite downstairs waiting to hear what Rose would say but Emmett spoke first, "What the hell is going on?" It was quite for a moment Aunt Rose was probably whispering playing along for me and Jake. We all waited.

Finally we heard Emmett yell, "What?" I could hear the door open and I saw Emmett's blur come down the stairs. He scooped me up and spun me around. As he spun me around he whispered, "Congrats soon to be Mrs. Black in my ear." Thank God he whispered I thought.

When he finally let me back on my own two feet I was dizzy and feel into Jake's arms. Emmett walked over to us and said, "We'll have a little _talk_ about this later," he said winking. Poor Jake I thought but they both laughed.

Hmm. I wondered what the 'talk' would be about. Emmett punched Jake on the shoulder and ran back up the stairs. This time when we heard the door shut we knew better than to listen. Jasper, Carlisle, and Esme still hadn't figured it out. I tried to think of a way to give them a hint without telling them.

I decided to just go back to the way I was standing before with my left hand on Jake's chest. They were all staring at me now. Then I decided against it. I walked behind Jake and got on my tip toes to put my head on his shoulder but I wasn't tall enough so I jumped onto his back.

After I that I slowly slid my hands onto Jake's chest putting my head on his shoulder. After I did that that's when everyone talked at the same time and it was hard to understand everyone.

"Oh Nessie, Jake congratulations! Oh yeah another wedding! Oh I'm so happy for you two," Esme exclaimed as I hopped off of Jake's back. She ran over giving us both huge hugs and kisses on the cheek.

Carlisle and Jasper were the calmest to receive the news. A stunning grin washed over both Carlisle and Jasper's faces.

Jasper said, "Well this makes since all the explanations I was coming up with in my head were way off. Oh, crap. Now I'm going to have to live with my wife the party planner," he laughed and Alice threw a pillow at him sticking out her tongue.

When Jasper was done talking Carlisle walked over. He gave us both a hug and told us how happy he was for us, but he didn't have much time to say anything else because he had to leave for work. So he kissed Esme goodbye congratulated Jake and I one more time and left.

The only ones left in the living room where Jake, myself, Alice, and my parents. Mom was still mad that she hadn't been 'in the know' and dad and Alice were just smirking.

I cleared my throat, "You know," I began, "my own mother has yet to congratulate her daughter," "Or her so called best friend," Jake chimed in and I finished, "on their engagement."

Then mom was abruptly over Alice and dad hiding things from her. A huge smile spread across her face as she ran over to me and Jake. "Congratulations," she said hugging me tightly.

"Thanks mom," I said rolling my eyes. I looked over at Jake to see him and my dad joking and laughing around.

I caught the tail end of him saying, "I was nervous as hell too," he laughed.

"Oh like you didn't know she'd say yes," my dad chuckled and Jake rolled his eyes. My mom walked over to Jake and pulled him into a hug as my dad came over to me hugging me tightly.

Then I remembered, "Oh Alice, guess what!"

"Yea, Yea, Yea," she bounced over to me yelling the whole way. "Oh I promise you your wedding will be perfect will go over details tomorrow. I'm assuming you want to be pretty involved."

"Yeah, I would," I said.

"Okay then," she said starting to make her way up the stairs. Then she stopped and turned back around to me, "Oh and I have your prom dress that you'll wear tomorrow. You and Jake have a limo picking you up. Oh your friends are going to flip out!"

I laughed, "Okay Alice."

When I looked back at everyone else my dad looked a little sad. Then he began to speak, "Is there something you need to tell us or ask us about, I didn't hear all your thoughts but I heard some of them."

Crap, Vanderbilt I thought. Awh. They were going to be so sad! Better now than later I guess. We can even give them the date of the wedding to brighten it up some. At least they'll know it's only for a year. We'll visit and they can visit, it's not for forever.

Eventually I nodded, "Follow me," I said leading them to the dining room table. How the hell was I going to do this? Ugh! I made Jake sit down first so I could sit on his lap. My parents sat across from us and I felt myself slowly slipping into panic mode.

"Mom, Dad," I began amazingly keeping my voice even. "We have something to tell you or discuss with you I mean I guess it really depends on your point of view and well I'll stop." I said realizing I was rambling.

"Whatever it is you can tell us sweetie you know that," mom said smiling sweetly. Why does she have to be so nice?

"Okay so you know how I've always wanted to live in the south right," I began.

"Yes," my dads said smoothly, he knew were this conversation was headed and I felt horrible.

"And you know that both Jake and I got accepted to Vanderbilt," I said firmly.

"Oh," my mother said realization and understanding taking over her features, "I guess I should've guessed you'd want to go to school down there, that you were actually considering it."

"Well," I said, "I had applied but knew with the sun it wasn't exactly a possibility but if I'm married then I won't have to move out there on my own."

"So you want to move away with Jake and go to Vanderbilt," my mom asked. She was trying to hide the sadness in her eyes but I could see it, I could see it in my dad's too.

"Yes," I breathed, "but only for about a year you know. We'd call and visit and you could visit us too if it was going to be raining or something for a weekend. It's just so we can get on our own two feet as a married couple. Kind of live a normal life I guess."

"I understand," my mom said and I sighed in relief.

"We both do," my dad added, "I mean who are we to stop you. Sure were your parents but it's your life. You just have to promise at most 2 years. Please," he pleaded.

"Of course," I reassured him, "We were thinking after the wedding come back here for a week and then head out."

"That sounds reasonable," my mom reassured me, "We'll go over all the details later," she said getting up. "Your father and I need to hunt and you need sleep," she said coming over to kiss my cheek.

"Alright," I said getting up off Jake's lap and going to hug my father goodnight. Once my parents were gone it was time to say goodbye to my fiancée. Oh how I loved the sound of that!

Jake and I were standing at the front door. I tilted my head up waiting for a goodbye peck but instead we had a full blown make out session at the door. The term 'making out' didn't seem appropriate since we were engaged but I didn't know how else to explain it.

His hands at gently cradled my face and then I slowly moved my hands from his chest to his neck and then settling on grabbing fistfuls of his hair. As my hands moved so did his.

One ever so slowly tracing down my neck, along my side, over my hips and then resting on my back. His other hand tangled in my hair as he pulled me closer to him with the hand that was on my back.

We kissed for who knows how long because when I kissed Jake time had no meaning. There was only me and him in the world and that was all that mattered. Us. He gave me a few last kisses before pulling away and whispering, "Goodnight future Mrs. Black," and smiling as he walked down the stairs.

I watched him go and waved goodbye sad that this perfect day was coming to an end but excited for another one to start. Tomorrow I would have to face prom and I wasn't quite sure as to how my friends would react to the news or what exactly I would tell them.

I pondered this as I made my way up to my room. I took of my dress and make up and took a quick shower. Once I was in my P.J.'s I slid into the covers and thought about my life and what a lucky girl I was...


	11. Chapter 11 Prom and Studying

**Chapter 11. Prom and Studying**

_A/N: Just so you know I decided to be nice and at the end I will post links so you can look at the prom dresses. You don't know how hard it is for me to look at one instead of design one because I want to be a fashion designer. I did this for your visual perposes and it may not be what I think to be the perfect dress. Also after the last chapter seeveral people asked if it was the last chapter I just thought I'd let you know I will put the end when it's the end but this story is far from over. Thank you so much for reading so far, reviews are appreciated!_

I woke up the next morning nice, refreshed, and peaceful. I could hear my family moving around outside and down stairs. It sounded like Emmett and Jasper were wrestling outside. I could hear them growling and laughing along with the sound of them hitting each other and knocking down a tree.

Then I laughed when I smiled when I heard Rosalie, "Boys if you knock over another tree Esme will kill you when she gets back from hunting with Carlisle." So apparently Aunt Rose was apparently watching my favorite uncles and my grandparents where hunting. I guess that left either my mother, father, or aunt would be the ones in the kitchen making food. Alice must have seen when I'd wake up.

I got up from my bed and looked at my clock. It read one o'clock that couldn't be right could it? I walked over to my window and pulled back the thick curtains. Sure enough the skin was high in the sky. Huh, I thought, how late was I out with Jake last night?

Then everything came back to me. The leaving the hospital, Alice fixing me up, the symphony, dancing, the proposal, telling everyone, and then telling my parents where I wanted to go to college. The perfect night must have lasted later then I thought it had, either that or I was standing in that doorway kissing Jake for a lot longer than I had thought.

Then my stomach growled and I decided it was time for me to go downstairs. I was still in my P.J.s, A tank top, some soffe shorts, and a cute pair of duck slippers. Okay so deep down I knew I was too old for duck slippers but the part of me that was an actual 7 year old wanted to keep them and if any 18 year old looking girl could pull them off it was me for sure.

As I rounded the door into the kitchen I could hear Emmett burst out into laughter. He was standing at the door that led outside. I was assuming that Jasper and him were done fighting but then he jumped out of view still laughing and collided with Jasper in the air. Oh how I love them I thought. My dad was sitting at the table reading the newspaper my mom on his lap.

It was weird and sweet seeing my parents together. I knew they loved each other and I knew they did it but that wasn't exactly something any daughter wants to think about. However when I looked at them I saw their unconditional love for each other and it warmed my heart. I saw my dad smile at my thoughts.

"Good morning sweetheart," he said looking up from the paper, "Oh and by the way," he added, "I like your slippers. There," he seemed at a loss of words, "Well you'll always look beautiful," he finished with a sincere smile on his face, my mother on his lap smiling at me too.

"Took the words right out of my mouth," Jake said wrapping his arms around me. This was a surprise I hadn't seen him when I first came down. I smiled and turned around tilting my head up to look at his face.

"When did you get here," I questioned.

"About an hour ago," he said, "I even made you breakfast, or well lunch whichever you prefer."

"All by himself too," my mother added smirking a little, "I didn't have to help him and he didn't burn it either," she continued then chuckled to herself. I was curious Jake wasn't exactly known for his cooking skills.

I looked back and him and said, "So what did you make me?"

He laughed, "Okay it's something super simple and one of the only things I can fix. A ham and cheese sandwich. I tried to at least make you a grilled ham and cheese, but well I did burn that one."

I laughed, "I love you anyway," I said getting up on my tiptoes to kiss his cheek. Then I walked over to the sandwich I now saw sitting on the table across from my parents with a glass of sweet tea at its side. I sat down and dug into the meal my fiancée had made for me and smiled.

Once I had finished eating and making small talk with my parents Alice came dancing in. "Finally you are done eating it took you forever I have to get you ready for prom come on now," she said taking my hand and pulling me towards the stairs then Aunt Rose ran in next to us.

"I get to do her hair this time," she growled and then laughed. "Fine," Aunt Alice grumbled and I laughed at their little exchange of words.

Once we were up stairs I had to sit in a chair for several hours letting rose mess with my hair and Alice does my makeup. Several times I thought they were done only to discover I had just gotten my hopes up and they had decided to start over. When they were finally through with me it was five thirty.

Alice and Rose weren't happy about their time. We had started at one thirty but at three thirty I asked for an hour break which put them an hour behind what they wanted. Oh well I guess that sucks for them. I had to say I loved the dress Alice had gotten me.

It was a SHERRI HILL dress. Very short, not even reaching halfway down my thigh but it wasn't skanky. The dress was fun, flirty, and sexy showing some leg. I was in 4 inch Miu Miu heels. They were black and simple in the front but the actual heel was great.

They started black at the top and then faded to a white and had black jewels around them. They were amazing and went great with the dress. The dress itself was great. It had a black sweet heart neckline. That part was simple, but right under your breasts it had a baby, baby pink with black detail fabric that continued onto the back. Coming out from under that was the greatest light pink tulle. It had black and white details covering the edge of the tulle, but all together the dress was perfect.

Since Aunt Alice knew I would be dancing she gave me some under armor to wear under the dress. Oh how I loved spandex I thought to myself and heard my dad chuckle from downstairs. I really did though. This would help me be able to actually dance and not have to worry about being in a dress. It all together allowed me to be myself.

I was still standing in front of the mirror. Alice hadn't given me a smoky eye this time but it was still dark. I had on very black eyeliner and mascara. Right under my eyebrow, on my creases, and under my eye a little was a white shimmery shadow. On my actual lid and going up some to blend with the white was a black shadow. I had on a light blush and my lips were a light pink today.

Even though I didn't enjoy sitting in a chair for three hours the end results were absolutely amazing! Aunt Rose had done my hair several different ways. Once it was slicked back into a low pony and as soon as she did it she knew it wasn't right. She had also tried curly side pony, straight with a poof pony, and a bun but none of them were right. Eventually I spoke up and asked, "Why do you keep putting my hair up?"

I was right of course. Right now it was curly and hanging freely. It matched my amazing mood. I had on a few black bracelets on my right wrist, one black anklet Aunt Alice had gotten me a while back, and a simple black chain that didn't hang to low or too high and it had a little wolf on it. Obviously Jake had gotten me that one. I was also wearing another thing Jake had got me, my engagement ring.

Oh what my friends will say I thought as I rounded the corner to walk down the stairs. I could see Jake waiting for me. He was in a nice grey tux, a black vest underneath. Even though grey wasn't a prominent part in my dress you could tell that he was my date. All a part of Alice's perfect planning.

When I reached the bottom of the stairs Jake smiled. "You look beautiful," he said coming to kiss me on the cheek. I smiled, "Thanks," I said blushing. Then he pulled something out from behind his back it was a corsage. It was white and black and very pretty. "Thank you," I said smiling and held out my left hand for Jake to slide it onto my wrist.

Once the corsage was in place there were many pictures taken by my parents, aunts, and grandparents. Jake and I smiled and played along taking some silly pictures along with the sweeter ones. Also some romantic ones because who knows these could be our engagement pictures. At six the limo showed up and Jake and I left with a have fun from every member of my family.

Once Jake and I had arrived at the hotel were prom was being held everything was a buzz. We walked in and Usher's 'OMG' was playing some were on the dance floor but most were either just standing around or sitting some were eating. What party killers! Surely they will play some good dancing music later I thought. I walked over to a table, Jake in tow, where my best friend from school was sitting.

"Malyssa," I squealed running over to hug her I hadn't seen her in weeks.

When I got to her she hugged me tightly then she said, "Well look who we have here. Miss Nessie Cullen finally showin' her face around here!" I laughed, Malyssa had a country accent because she was from Kentucky, and in fact last I heard she would be going to school at the University of Kentucky.

Malyssa was wearing a baby doll dress similar to mine. It was leopard print on top, with a hot pink ribbon and bow under that. The bottom of her dress was also tulle with tan on bottom and brown on top. Her hair was poofed up and slicked back into a high and perky ponytail. It worked on her, not me.

We sat down and started talking. She was sitting next to her date, another one of my friends. His name was Richard but we all called him Richie most of the time, he hated it but we thought it was funny. Richie was in a brown tux and his vest was leopard print to match Malyssa's dress.

As we were talking about the reasons I had been gone, me keeping up my story, I ran my left hand through my hair and Malyssa said, "Let me look at your corsage." She took hold of my left hand and then noticed the ring on my finger.

"No," she exclaimed looking up in shock and I nodded, "He didn't," she went on and I nodded again probably looking like an idiot.

"What the hell," she squealed pulling me into a hug then she pulled away and held my shoulders. "When did this happen? How did he do it? Speaking of do it you aren't knocked up are you?"

"No," I yelled.

"Oh good," she said relief washing over her features. "Can I tell everyone," she moaned.

"Sure," I smiled, "as soon as they get here you can tell them."

"Yea," she smiled and hugged me again then she hugged Jake. "I'm so happy for you too."

Just as she was saying that the rest of my friends came in. They all looked great. Of course. My friends and I always dressed the best, not because we were the richest but because we liked to look good. "Nessie, Lyssa," my friend Nawtia, or Tia called out.

Tia was wearing a long black skirt and a red, flaring, sweetheart top. The top had a black bow on the right. The whole ensemble reminded me of a mermaid dress. It was very vintage and she looked like she should be walking down a grand stair case on the Titanic or something. Tia has always been glamour's and wished she was born in a different time period.

Behind her came the rest of my friends; Addison or Addie, Charlotte, Breanna or Bre, Aurora, and Racquel. They all had dates and looked amazing because that is just my friends for you. They had all made sure that their boyfriends and dates had on matching tuxes and vests.

Addie was in an all white, sweetheart cocktail dress. There was a mint green satin waistband with jewels on the left side to add a little pop. All together she looked amazing.

Charlotte was in a stunning red dress. The simple part that just hugged her tightly was covered by a red wrap that matched. Part covered her shoulder and the end hung freely after having jewels that connected it to the dress right above her hip. I wasn't quite sure it was meant for prom but it worked for her and she looked great.

Breanna was wearing something simple and casual that I personally wouldn't have picked for prom, then again I wouldn't have picked Tia's dress either. Bre's dress was all black and had strips hugging her tightly. The top part was kind of flowing covering her arms and shoulders with a v-neck in front and back.

Then there was Aurora's dress. She has always been one for attention and she looked amazing. She was in a long gown, but boy was this gown something else. It was made of what looked like what they use to make disco balls but still moved effortlessly. It also had a sweetheart neckline. On the left leg there was a long slit that came up to the middle of her thigh showing off her legs. All in all she looked like a super model and I told her that.

Racquel also looked stunning. She was also in a long gown. Hers was made out of all black sequences. The back of the dress was my favorite with the fabric draping down and it looked amazing against her pale skin. The front was high-necked and razorback but it the front.

All of my friends looked great and there dresses matched their tastes. I was glad I wasn't the only one of my friends who was pale though. Tia, Charlotte, and Racquel were also porcelain and it made me less self-conscious when I was with them. I know it may sound vain but it's true.

When all my friends eventually got to our table they all hugged me and asked where I had been and all those questions. I was having tone of fun. Malyssa had asked me to keep my engagement ring hidden and I was but I didn't understand why. Then as we were all finishing up some cake about to head onto the dance floor Malyssa said she had some news.

"So," Malyssa started, "Do yall want to hear the news or not?"

"Just spit it out Lyssa," Bre and Addie yelled at the same time.

"Alright so my news is," she said grabbing my arm under the table, "Nessie is engaged," she squealed lifting my hand up from under the table. After that there were various responses from the other 12 people who didn't know sitting at the table. Some like 'Oh my gosh', 'What the hell?', and 'Are you for real?' just to name a few.

I explained to everyone all the details and what not and they were all thrilled for me. Eventually we got up and started dancing. They played all the best group dancing songs like ChaCha Slide, Cupid Shuffle, Soulja Boy (Crank That), and many other that had come around over the years. At one point while we were on the dance floor it was all the girls and they kicked me off when Beyonce's 'Single Ladies' came on. Charlotte said, "Your man liked it so he _did _put a ring on it." I must say Jake and I did get a good laugh at that one.

I was at home now about to fall asleep, after all of my girlfriends started freaking out about finals this coming week I decided I would study with them at Racquel's house the next day. Jake was going to drop me off and then I would just get a ride from Bre's boyfriend. It didn't bother me because he was Bre's boyfriend. The next day would be fun and I couldn't wait...

_A/N: Just so you know this is the next day. I don't know how you felt about prom I didn't put too much detail into it and I'm sorry but it had to be there so you could meet Nessie's friends. Those names are real by the way I found them all on a baby name website. I did however spell Melissa different than usual so here nickname could be Lyssa. It is an inside thing. Links for the dresses later I'll let you get back to the story. Sorry hope you like the next part though. R&R please:)_

"I'm ready," I called down the stairs knowing Jake could hear me. I headed for the stairs wearing a denim skirt, over sized shirt with a belt, and short black high heeled boots.

"You're wearing that," Jake questioned me.

"Yes," I said a little annoyed who was he to say what I should wear?

"Really, because you look to sexy for your own good," he said coming to wrap his arms around me.

"Oh please," I said, "It's just me and some girlfriends studying no need to get all worked up."

"Some of their boyfriends will be there," he said frowning. I put my hand on his chest showing him images of my friends and how happy they were with their boyfriends.

"I'm engaged and they know that," I said smirking.

"Yes well that doesn't mean they should be able to look at you. That's my job," he whispered in my ear and a chill ran down my spine.

"I know it is," I said sliding my hands under his shirt so I could feel his muscles on my finger tips, "but really is it that bad? They get to look but you get to touch," I whispered and then his hands cradled my face and we were kissing. I was about to deepen the kiss but then I heard my dad clear his throat.

"You are going to be late," he said with a look of disgust on his face.

"Oh your right dad," I said pulling away from Jake blushing a bright red, "I guess will be going then." I walked over to dad and kissed him on the cheek and then grabbed Jake's hand pulling him to the door. I called out a, "Bye every one," over my shoulder and was out the door.

Once we were in the car Jake and I talked all the way to Racquel's house. When we arrived he told me he could pick me up but I told him to go home and go to sleep, that I would get a ride. He gave me a quick kiss and told me to 'Be Safe' and I laughed.

I was inside now helping Bre and her boyfriend (well she had just met him a week ago this was their second date, first being the prom) Ben with math.

"See it's not that hard," I exclaimed.

"Easy for you to say," Bre whined, "you are good in every single subject! Even P.E., I mean who the hell gives a damn in P.E.?"

"Breanna, this is back from pre algebra! To find the hypotenuse you use a2 + b2, which are the two legs find the square root of that and you get c2, or in other words the answer."

"Ugh," she groaned, "How am I ever going to get this?"

"I promise this probably won't even be on finials!"

"How do you know? I'm going to have to stay up all night studying," she complained.

"Oh yea and fall asleep during the middle of finals. That's real bright!"

"Breanna come here I need your help with history," Racquel yelled, "and Nessie you should probably get going its midnight. Everybody else already left and Bre is staying the night. We are pulling an all nighter."

I got up and laughed, "I really don't think that is wise of you too."

"Oh well," Bre said, "We will do what we do. Hey Ben can you give Nessie a ride home."

"Sure," he said in his low mono tone. I didn't see what Bre saw in him. My guess was that she had really needed a date for the dance. Ben was scruffy and a total drag. He didn't talk unless he was spoken to and even then only what was totally needed.

We had been driving in his car for ten minutes. He hadn't said a word to me. Actually when we first got in he asked for the general location of my home, but other than that nothing. He had some determined look on his face like he was planning something. Then all of the sudden he pulled over.

"What are you doing," I asked.

Ben sighed. He was staring forward looking out the window. His hands gripping the steering wheel tightly. Then all of the sudden he put his hands on my shoulders and he had pushed me into a kind of laying position. His car didn't have seatbelt and I hadn't thought anything about it but I wish I had.

He was lying on top of me and I could feel his breathe on my face. "What are you doing," I asked. "Get off of me," I said trying to push him off of me with my left arm. I was kind of lying on top of my right arm, my left still weak from the crash. "Get off," I screamed giving another push, it really sucked that I was part human.

"I'm just trying to let you have a little fun before you get married," he said in a voice that made the hairs on my back stand up. "I bet you fiancée never does this," he said and yanked my hair and I screeched.

"Please get off of me," I said beginning to cry, "Just get off of me."

"Not a chance," he whispered and then so quickly I'm not sure how it happened he had pulled down my skirt and I yelled, "STOP," at the top of my lungs and he laughed. He started kissing my neck and then he yanked at my shirt pulling it up almost off only for him to discover that he couldn't get it through my arms without releasing me. He could see my bra though which meant my boobs were in easy view.

I used his momentary distraction to hit my hard head against his. I could tell I hurt him and opened the door behind me and I fell out onto my back. I got up grabbing my purse as I did and ran into the woods crying. Once I knew I was a safe distance away from Ben I got my phone out of my bag and called Jake.

"Hello," he said his voice heavy with sleep.

"Jake," I cried, "Oh Jake. Please, please come get me, help me," I cried into the phone.

"What happened," he asked instantly alert, "Where are you I'm coming to get you." I could hear him up and moving around, different doors opening.

"About 6 or so miles from the house. I'll walk to the highway. Jake I'm hiding in the woods. Ben tried to rape me," I cried.

"He WHAT,"I heard him roar and then call 'Edward' away from the phone. I heard my dad come into the room growling with rage. "Get to the highway. I'm coming, I love you," he said before hanging up the phone.

I started running for the highway. I was a mess. I could feel my mascara running, my shirt wasn't in place, and neither was my skirt. I was still crying and didn't think I would be stopping any time soon. Then I saw the headlights of Jake's Vanquish and Uncle Emmett's jeep.

Jake got out of the car running over to me and taking in my appearance. "Oh Nessie," he said pulling me into his arms. "I'm so, so so sorry," he murmured against my hair. As he held me I jumped up straddling his waist to rest my head on his shoulder. Remarkably at this moment I didn't want him to kiss me. I just wanted him to hold me in his arms just hold me.

Since my head was on Jake's shoulder I could see the highway where there were no cars. Then I saw headlights of the car that I had been in minutes ago. "That's him," I stated. Emmett who was still in the driver's seat of his jeep drove onto the road blocking both lanes. The horrid car screeched to a stop.

Jake was going to set me down and I clung to his shirt. "Just a second," he whispered and he did put me down. He ran over to the driver's side, slung the door open and yanked Ben down onto the concrete. He then bent down and started punching him. He only got in a few blows before daddy put a hand on his shoulder and told him something.

Jake came back over to me scooping me up in his arms and putting me in his car. The car ride was only about a minute long then he was scooping me out carrying me to my room. He brought me to my bathroom and told me to take a shower.

As I was in the shower I was trying to loosen up and calm down. Shake tonight's event off but it wasn't exactly happening. I heard my bathroom door open and stopped the shower to get out. My mom was waiting there with some P.J.s and open arms. "Mommy," I whimpered walking into her arms.

"Oh honey," she said wrapping her arms around me. We stood like that for several minutes and then she said, "I think tomorrow you should talk to your Aunt Rosalie." I just nodded. I had no idea why I should talk to Aunt Rose but I would anyway.

"Is Jake still here," I asked and this time she nodded. She handed me the P.J.s kissed my head and left. I put on Jake's shirt and some Aeropostale sleep pants. I through my hair up into a ponytail and left my bathroom.

Jake was sitting in my mom's old rocking chair next to my bed. He opened his eyes when I walked in. As I walked by him I just grabbed his hand and pulled him to my bed. I put the covers over both of us and snuggled close to him.

I didn't want to sleep that was for sure. I had a bad feeling that when I closed my eyes I would see what happened today, maybe what would have happened if I hadn't got away. I wasn't exactly sure if I was ready to do what I was about to do but I decided it didn't matter.

I turned over on to my stomach and started kissing Jake's chest. I knew dad wouldn't approve on what I was planning to do so I hoped he wasn't home yet. I moved on top of Jacob my weight resting on my palms and started moving my lips up to his neck. He sighed, "Nessie what are you doing?"

"I don't want to sleep," I mumbled, "I want you."

"Renesmee you and I both know you are not ready. Even if you were our first time would not be in reaction to this and for the sake of me living and your dad not killing me it will be when we are married."

I sat up, "Oh so my dad gets to decide when we do it now?"

"No we do, and it will not be now. Not after what just happened and you know you aren't ready."

I couldn't exactly deny that last part so I just said, "I don't want to sleep." As I said this I slipped back onto my side, my head resting on Jake's chest.

"Tell me why," he said kissing my hair.

"I'm scared."

"Of what," he asked and I could hear the heartbreak in his voice from just those two little words.

"I'm afraid that when I close my eyes that's what I'll see and that when I wake up I'll be back in that car with him on top of me," I said admitting more to him then I had to myself.

His arms automatically tightened around me. "Tell you what. I'll sleep here tonight, you in my arms and I promise then when you wake up you will still be in my arms. I also promise that your dad will watch your dreams and if they start going in a bad direction we will wake you up."

"You promise," I asked.

"Promise."

Jake rested his cheek on the top of my head one of his arms rubbing my back soothingly. From downstairs I could hear my lullaby start up and I had a feeling that daddy would still be playing for me when I woke up. He would play for me all night. I found comfort in that and knowing Jake would be there when I woke so I closed my eyes.

Right before I slipped into unconsciousness I whispered, "You were right. I shouldn't have worn that outfit."

_A/N: So here are the links I promised... This is my longest chapter I was going to make it two. Prom and Studying and they each would have had more dialogue but decided against it. And while I'm here I'm sorry if the idea of rape is offensive to you but she didn't actually get rapped. And I'll go ahead and do one of those disclaimer things... __**Disclaimer: I do not own any of Stephenie Meyer's characters or story lines. This is just a little something I came up with in my head.**__ Okay now that I'm done with that here are the links! R&R Please:)_

1. Renesmee's Dress. .?prod=sherri_hill_3401&cat=16

2. Renesmee's Shoes. .

3. Renesmee's Corsage. .com/files/1_ivory_Black_

4. Malyssa's Dress. .?prod=Sherri_Hill_1218&cat=16

5. Nawtia/ Tia's Dress. .com/dresses/Sherri_Hill_

6. Addison/ Addie's Dress. .?prod=Sherri_Hill_1002_pink&cat=16

7. Charlotte's Dress. .com/dresses/Sherri_Hill_

8. Breanna/ Bre's Dress. .com/dresses/Sherri_Hill_

9. Aurora's Dress. .?prod=Sherri_Hill_2270&cat=16

10. Racquel's Dress. .com/dresses/Sherri_Hill_


	12. Chapter 12 Anger

**Chapter 12. Anger Jacob's POV**

"I'm ready," I heard Nessie call from upstairs. Then she rounded the corner and I saw what she was wearing. A short skirt and heels. I mean who needs to look that freaking sexy while studying?

"You're wearing that," I questioned her.

"Yes," she said a little annoyed.

"Really, because you look to sexy for your own good," I told her and slipped my arms around her.

"Oh please," she said, "It's just me and some girlfriends studying, no need to get all worked up."

"Some of their boyfriends will be there," I said. She put her hand on my chest showing me images of her friends and how happy they were with their boyfriends.

"I'm engaged and they know that," she added and smirked.

"Yes well that doesn't mean they should be able to look at you. That's my job," I whispered in her ear.

"I know it is," she said sliding her hands under my shirt her fingers grazing against my skin, "but really is it that bad? They get to look but you get to touch," she whispered and then I took her face in my hands and started to kiss her. One of her hands was starting to move out from under my shirt but then we weren't alone.

Edward cleared his throat and said, "You are going to be late."

"Oh your right dad," Ness said pulling away from me and blushing a bright red, "I guess will be going then." She walked over to her dad and kissed him on the cheek and then grabbed my hand pulling me to the door. She called out a, "Bye every one," over her shoulder and was out the door pulling me with her. Before I was completely out though I took my free hand and blew Edward a kiss and thought, '_Bye Dad_.' He rolled his eyes and I smirked.

Once we were in the car Renesmee and I talked all the way to Racquel's house. When we arrived I told her I could pick her up but she told me I should get some sleep, that she had a ride. I gave me a quick kiss and told her to 'Be Safe' and she laughed and I frowned.

I drove home with the newest music playing in the background. It really stunk that Miley Cyrus was still singing. Her music was okay in the beginning but it just kept getting worse and worse. I had arrived home and saw Emmett and Jasper wrestling again and I laughed.

"You want to join us," Emmett called while throwing Jasper into a tree.

Esme heard the noise and came outside, "Jacob you will not join them. I have enough reckless boys ruining my trees."

"Yes mamma," I said frowning and then I heard Emmett and Jasper laughing.

"Oh you boys think it's so funny. I haven't even gotten to you to yet. You're going to come inside right now and sit in the kitchen. No TV, video games, or computer and then tomorrow you will go get me some more trees and plant them after school. Do you boys understand me?"

"Yes mom," they both said frowning and this time it was my turn to laugh. I could hear the rest of the family laughing inside with me.

I walked in and Bella said, "Are you picking Nessie up?"

"No," I said, "she said she would get a ride back."

"Oh," Bella said a hint of surprise in her face.

"Oh Jacob," Alice called from her room upstairs, "I need you."

I shot a questioning look to Edward wonder why Alice needed me and he just shrugged as if to say it wasn't a big deal. I started up the stairs wondering what it was Alice could want. I reached out for the knob but then the door swung open.

"Come in," Alice chimed.

"What's up midget," I said jokingly.

She stuck her tongue out at me and I smiled, "I'm only a midget to you dog I'm just short to everyone else."

"Dog," I said pretending to be offended, "I thought we were over all the prejudice."

"Oh we are," she laughed, "So I have a question for you. I was trying to figure out what I should pack for Nessie, you know for the honeymoon, but then I remembered I don't know where you are taking her," she said and smacked my arm.

"Hey," I complained, "that was uncalled for."

"Oh don't be a baby! Where are you taking her?"

"Honestly I'm not sure."

"You're not sure," she yelled and I could hear Bella and Edward chuckling from downstairs.

"Yea, I mean I still have a while to decide."

"How do you know how long you have? You two haven't picked a date yet."

"Well it is obviously this summer."

"Oh thanks so much for your help," she sighed dramatically falling down onto her bed.

"Chill."

She sat up, "Chill? You want me to chill? I have to order stuff for Nessie's honeymoon. I got Bella all of her stuff custom."

"You what," Bella said from downstairs and then she was standing in the doorway.

"Calm down Bella," Alice said exasperated, "You weren't going to wear things that you could just find at any old Victoria Secret. It was going to be custom things that Edward would like to see you in. I'm sure Renesmee will want some input though. Who knows depending on where they go she may need actual clothes," Alice finished smirking.

"Oh I really didn't need to hear that," I said. Like I needed to now that Bella only wore lingerie on her honeymoon. Where did they go, a private island?

"Yes," Edward said now standing in the doorway.

"You guys have your own island," I asked my eyes popping out of my head.

"Actually Esme let us borrow hers. It was a gift to her from Carlisle. I'm sure she would let you use it," Edward said.

"Oh well the fact that it was a gift makes it so much better," I said rolling my eyes, "and thanks but no thanks. I'd rather not have my honeymoon be at the place where my bride was conceived."

"That makes since," Alice chimed in.

"Got any other islands we could use," I asked only joking.

"Not at the moment," Edward said, "but I've been looking. I figured you'd say something like that and well Nessie's never been to the beach, so Bella and I were thinking of getting you and Ness one for your engagement gift."

"Are you serious," I asked my eyes bugging out.

"Yes," Edward said shrugging like an island was no big deal.

"Alright. If you really want to work out all the details then I guess that is where I'm taking Nessie," I said not really believing it.

"Okay. It'll all be worked out," Bella said proudly.

"I'm going to bed," I said. My head was spinning and I needed sleep. "We'll talk more later."

I walked up another flight of stairs to my room and changed into some basketball shorts and a tight t-shirt. Then I fell on my bed and was out within minutes.

I was dreaming I was on an island kissing Nessie in the sand when I heard my phone ring. I groaned and rolled over to answer planning to cuss out Seth or someone.

"Hello," I said.

"Jake," I heard Nessie cry and instantly straightened up, "Oh Jake. Please, please come get me, help me."

"What happened," I asked, "Where are you I'm coming to get you." I was now up and moving around, opening my closet door to grab shoes then going out into the hall.

"About 6 or so miles from the house. I'll walk to the highway. Jake I'm hiding in the woods. Ben tried to rape me," cried

I was livid, "he WHAT,"I roared and then I called Edward's name away from the phone. Apparently he had heard because he came into the room growling with rage like I wanted to do.

"Get to the highway. I'm coming, I love you," I said quickly and hung up the phone.

Edward and I were running towards the door. "Emmett, Jasper. Here now, I'll explain in the car," Edward yelled. I ran to my car and got in and pulled out without hesitation and started racing towards where Nessie was. I was going to kill the piece of shit. How dare he try and do that to her!

I turned a corner and I saw her standing on the side of the road. I slammed on my breaks and jumped out of my car. I ran over to Ness taking in her appearance as I did so. She was a mess tear and mascara stained cheeks and she was still crying. Her shirt and skirt were both out of place. I was going to **KILL** that mother fu...

I stopped that train of thought pulling Ness into my arms. "I'm so, so so sorry," I murmured into her hair. She jumped up and wrapped her legs around my waist and putting her head on my shoulder. I just held her because I knew that is what she needed. She didn't need kisses or to be talked to, she needed someone to hold her. To be strong for her.

I could hear a car coming up on the road and didn't think anything of it but then Nessie said, "That's him." I heard Emmett's car drive onto the road and then the car screech to a stop. I was going to set Ness down and she started clinging to my shirt. "Just a second," I whispered setting her down.

I ran over to the car slinging the jackass onto the concrete. I bent down and started to punch him repeatedly. I was going to kill him. I only got a few blows in though before I felt Edward's restricting hand on my shoulder. I turned around to glare at him but he only needed to say three words, "Renesmee needs you." I got up and as I went back to Renesmee Emmett and Jasper both said, "We'll take care of him," to low for Nessie to hear.

I walked over to her and scooped her up in my arms bringing her to my car. I tried to drive as quickly as I possibly could. When we arrived at the house no one was in view or sight. I took Nessie up to her bathroom and told her to take a shower. Then I went and sat in Bella's old rocking chair closing my eyes.

I heard the door open and Bella and Rosalie walked in. "Where is everyone," I questioned.

"Hunting," Bella said frowning.

"Oh," was all I said. Bella went and got Renesmee some pajamas and then Blondie spoke.

"Tell her that tomorrow morning I want to talk to her. I'm the only one that can relate to her in this situation."

"What," I questioned.

"I was rapped," she whispered and my jaw dropped. "I'm going to be with Emmett, I can hear his car."

"I'll go give these clothes to Ness," she said but walked over to me kissing me on the cheek. "Thank you for being there for her, just like you where there for me."

"Anytime," I said.

I closed my eyes and listened as Bella entered. When I heard Renesmee whimper 'Mommy' it broke my heart. I listened to them pass words and then Bella left. After that Renesmee came out and I opened my eyes.

She started walking to her bed and I thought she was just going to pass me by but she grabbed my hand pulling me with her. She got in her bed and I did too then she pulled the covers over us. She snuggled closer to me and we just lay like that for a while. I could tell she was deep in thought so I didn't disturb her.

Then Renesmee rolled over onto her stomach landing her more on top of me. She started kissing my chest and I had a feeling I knew what she wanted. She then positioned herself completely on top of me putting her weight in her arms and moving on to kissing my neck. That was enough, I knew her dad was home but that didn't have anything to do with my logic on this subject. She wasn't ready.

I sighed, "Nessie what are you doing?"

"I don't want to sleep," she mumbled, "I want you."

"Renesmee you and I both know you are not ready. Even if you were, our first time would not be in reaction to this. Also for the sake of me living and your dad not killing me it will be when we are married."

She sat up, "Oh so my dad gets to decide when we do it now?"

"No we do, and it will not be now. Not after what just happened and you know you aren't ready."

I had hit the right spot. She wasn't ready and she knew it so she just said, "I don't want to sleep." As she said this she slipped back onto her side, her head resting on my chest.

"Tell me why," I said kissing her hair.

"I'm scared."

"Of what," I asked and my heart broke. I didn't want her to be afraid of anything.

"I'm afraid that when I close my eyes that's what I'll see and that when I wake up I'll be back in that car with him on top of me," she said I tightened my grip on her.

"Tell you what," I said, "I'll sleep here tonight, you in my arms and I promise that when you wake up you will still be in my arms. I also promise that your dad will watch your dreams and if they start going in a bad direction we will wake you up."

"You promise," she asked.

"Promise," I said.

I rested my cheek on the top of her head. I rubbed her back soothingly. Then I shouted at Edward mentally, "_Edward play her lullaby. It will calm her down so she can sleep. Play all night if you have to and watch her dreams please."_ From downstairs I could hear her lullaby start up and I mentally told Edward thank you.

Right before she fell asleep she whispered, "You were right. I shouldn't have worn that outfit."

That was hard to hear. If I just wouldn't have listened to her. If I would have gone to get her this wouldn't have happened. I could hear that Alice, Esme, and Carlisle were back and everyone was feeling them in. After a couple of minutes there was a knock at the door.

"Come in," I whispered, it was Alice.

"Alice, why didn't you see that happening. I thought seeing us was easier, clearer now."

"It is easier," she whispered looking distraught; "I see better now but it's not perfect at all. I wish it was trust me. Maybe I could have prevented this; actually I knew I could have. I had a vision of Rose talking to Nessie tomorrow about what happened to her when she was human.

"I didn't understand why so I started home, but it was too late. I think it's because I didn't look and it was a snap decision on Ben's part. I don't know. I just, I just feel like it was my entire fault," she said hitting her head against a wall.

"It wasn't your fault," I said, "What did they do to Ben anyway."

She smirked at that, "Well Jasper and Emmett went into protective uncle mode so they were all livid. They each got in there hits and as bad as they wanted to kill him they didn't. It goes against what we stand for and Carlisle wouldn't have been happy with them just because.

"Anyway they ruined his car while he was knocked out, thanks to them, on the side of the road. They tore stuff broke everything off. There is no going back for that car. They put him in it. Made it look like a bad wreck. Called it in saying a runaway rapist crashed their car," she shrugged.

"So they didn't kill him," I frowned.

A small smirk flickered across her features and she said, "No, they didn't kill him."

"Oh."

"Get some sleep. You'll need it, we all of finals in the morning."

"We are actually going to school?"

"We've missed a lot all ready and unless we want a bunch of people to know what happened tonight we have to keep up appearances."

"Alright," I sighed slumping down to get comfortable.

Alice was walking out the door when she turned around and said, "Edward and everyone says thank you. You are being real good to Nessie. You are exactly what she needs. Edward also says he'll play all night and watch her dreams."

"Thanks for the message midget."

"Any time," she smiled.

When she was gone I tried to get comfortable and I eventually feel asleep with Renesmee in my arms.


	13. Chapter 13 Parties

**Chapter 13. Parties Nessie's POV**

After that one incident everything went back to normal. I mean I was a wreck at school the next day, but I was better after talking to Aunt Rose. She helped me get over it. Of course I cried some while we talked, but it did help and I was able to get on with my life.

I had finished my finals and passed them with flying colors, even the ones I took on the first day. All of my friends passed too and I graduated on May 27th, 2017 for my first time.

After school was over I went into full bridal mode planning my wedding with Alice. I loved everything about planning it. Picking out flowers, plates, dresses, music, chairs, and anything and everything. I couldn't decide which my favorite was. Picking out and designing my wedding dress with Alice, or picking out my lingerie with Alice, Rose, Esme, mom, and my friends.

When I picked some out with my friends we all went to a Victoria Secret and kind of goofed off getting stairs by people walking bye. When Alice however found out that I had Victoria Secret things she went through it all only letting me keep one of the things. After that it was all custom ordered with my family and that was, well, interesting?

The color theme of my wedding was light blue and a mint green. My bridesmaids where Alice, Leah, and Kim. I had gotten to know both Leah and Kim well over the years and I loved them to death. Leah wasn't as grumpy she had imprinted on someone and only after that had she opened up to me. I thought about asking Emily but decided against it. She was pregnant with her and Sam's third child and I didn't want to stress her out.

My friends weren't mad not to be in my wedding. They understood, they said it should be people I had known my whole life. They did help me plan though and I was glad for their help.

Jake and I had gone to La Push for Fourth of July and we were bringing the pack, Grandpa Charlie, Sue, Billy, and, the imprinties back with us. They were staying in a hotel down the road until the wedding.

Rachel had come with Paul and Rebecca would be flying in from Hawaii tonight and would leave right after the reception. She wasn't bringing her family because it was too expensive. We had offered to pay but she wouldn't let us.

Rachel and Paul's daughter who was 6, her name was Sadie, and she would be our flower girl and there 5 year old son, Leon, would be our ring bearer. Those two were so cute.

Jake and I decided to wait until marriage, though we had come close several times. We wanted it to be 'special' but I was excited to be alone with him without my father or any other vampires around. I still think that Jake thinks I'm not ready but he needs to trust that I am.

In less than 24 hours I would be Mrs. Black. I smiled. The boys had left an hour ago for Jake's bachelor party, even dad was going. I had a feeling I wouldn't see Jake until the ceremony because that's just Alice for you.

I stepped out of the shower and dried off putting on my robe and then Alice came in, "Hey babe," she said.

"Hey Aunt Alice," I said, "What are you doing in here?"

"I thought I'd tell you that I left your clothes on the bed."

"My clothes," I questioned.

"Did you really think I wouldn't throw you a bachelorette party? I didn't throw one for your mom because I knew she would have thrown a hissy fit, but I'm throwing one for you," she said smiling.

"I love you Alice," I said shaking my head and walking out of my bathroom to get my clothes.

"I know you do," Alice said and I laughed.

I stopped all of the sudden when I saw the outfit laid out for me, "Alice what is this?"

"Your outfit," she laughed, "What else would it be?"

"Do you mean half of an outfit?"

"Come on! Wear this for me! Please," she begged, "Rose and some of your friends are dressing the same way! I mean it is your last night of being single and it's a girl's night. You can make men stare at you. Last chance to be a slut," she said winking.

"Alice I _know_ I'll look like a slut in this," I said frowning.

"That's the point," she smiled, "It'll be fun I promise because when are you ever going to dress like a slut and enter a wet t-shirt contest again?"

"I'm what," I yelled.

"Your friends are too and so is Rose. I love you sweetie but Rose will beat you."

"Yea I know," I said rolling my eyes. "All right now leave so I can transform myself into a slut," I said smirking.

"Yea! I love you Nessie," she said kissing my cheek and dancing out of the room.

I got dressed in the crazy outfit. She had given me a black lacy bra, a sheer, low cut white crop top cover up, and a skirt that hardly covered my butt. That's not even mentioning the striper shoes she gave me or the fact that the shirt had slits all along the front. I couldn't believe my _aunt_ had gotten me something like this. Of course she is the one that helped me pick out my lingerie so I guess I could.

I went into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. If I was going to do this I was going all out. How do you make your hair and makeup sluty though? I decided to tease my hair all of my hair and put in lots of hair spray. That could be sluty right? Then I gave myself dark eye makeup, dark red lips, and dark blush.

I walked out of my room and started towards the stairs. When I rounded the corner I saw Alice, Rosalie, Esme, Mom, Leah, Kim, Rachel, Rebecca (who I had only met once when I was 2), Malyssa, Tia, Addie, Bre, Charlotte, Racquel, and Aurora all standing downstairs. All of my friends and Rose where dressed like me; Alice, Leah, and Kim just in club attire; and the rest in normal clothes. Alice was right, tonight would be fun, different.

"Hey skank," Aunt Rosalie said and I smiled and rolled my eyes.

"Hefer," I said under my breath and she laughed.

"Oh you learned from the best," she said putting her arm over my shoulder.

"Okay, Okay," Alice said getting everyone's attention. "Does everyone have their stuff ready to go?"

"Yes," they all said.

"Alrighty then. The party bus is waiting outside to take us to the club."

"Party bus," I questioned getting excited.

Alice nodded, "I know, you love me."

We all filed out to the bus and once we were on their partying I didn't know if I could have more fun. We were all dancing and having a good time and that continued once we got to the club. At the club we danced and then later I got to open up my presents. I had already had my wedding shower were I had gotten the practical items like coffee makers, pots and pans, pillows, and many other house hold things.

Now these presents where just for fun. It turns out everyone had a thong in their back pocket and on Alice's signal they all flung them at me. They thought it was hilarious and so did I. My presents where a lot of thongs and bras and lingerie.

There was one pair I had gotten from mom she said that this I could actually wear with actual clothes. It was a pair of black boy short panties that said Mrs. on the front right corner and black on my butt. I had no idea why I liked them so much but I absolutely loved them!

We all got many good laughs out of all my gifts but then it was time for the wet t-shirt contest. Me, my school friends, and Rose went up on stage along with some other girls and got hosed down from head to toe. I really should have rethought the makeup and hair thing. They flung "make up removing towels" at us and we had to rub them over our faces. I didn't even know those existed!

After that some guy came up and they went off of applause on who would win. They said it was a tie between me and Rosalie, but because it was the night before my wedding Rose gave the crown to me. It really was a strange experience.

At midnight we decided to leave because I needed my "beauty sleep" according to Alice. Once we were on the bus I took off my wet "shirt" because it was really bugging me. My friends though it was hilarious that I was stripping and convinced me to get on the stripping poll. I didn't think I was thought good and that was proved when Aunt Rose got on there. I _really_ sucked compared to her!

We got to my house and all of my friends hugged me bye and that they would see me tomorrow. Alice told Rachel when to have her kids here to get ready and she also told Kim and Leah when to arrive. Right now I was in the party bus with Alice, Rose, mom, and Grandma Esme just goofing off, then everyone had to get all sentimental.

"You aren't my little girl anymore," my mom said.

"Awh mom," I whined, "You aren't supposed to be like this until tomorrow."

"Well I'm like this now," she said coming over to hug me. "Plus I can't be like this tomorrow because I'll be trying to make your dad not like this."

"I'm only going away for a year," I said pulling back to look at her.

"I know, I know," she said smoothing back my hair and then we heard tires hit the mile long driveway.

"That's them," Alice said and then jumped behind me putting a blindfold over my eyes.

"What the hell are you doing," I asked her.

"Hey your dad can hear you now no cursing. Oh, and put on your robe," she said handing me my robe while I tried to put it on blindly. Then someone, I don't know who picked me up and carried me out of the bus and outside.

I could hear Jacob and laughed at what he was saying. "Edward what are you doing?"

"Alice's orders," I heard my dad laugh and then a door opening.

"Did they blind fold you too," I asked into the air.

"How could you tell," Jacob laughed.

"Just a guess," I smirked and then remembered he couldn't see it.

"Alright listen you too. I'm allowing you a kiss. One kiss goodnight. Is that clear," Alice said.

"Yes Alice," we both grumbled.

Then I was sat on my feet and pushed forward, "Who did that," I grumbled and I heard my mom laugh.

"Just take a step forward," my dad said and so I did and I ran into Jacob.

He started laughing and I said, "Hey I'm in a blindfold too."

"True," he laughed.

"Catch me," I said and as I jumped up I heard him say 'What' but it was a little late for that.

He did amazingly catch me blind as he was and I smiled and said, "Good catch."

He laughed and I leaned in to kiss him. My mouth found his and we were only kissing for a few seconds when I felt someone pulling me away. I put my hands in Jake's hair holding onto him and trying to find the blindfold.

"Oh no you don't," Alice said pulling me off of Jake.

"Alice," I whined and everyone else but Jacob chuckled.

"Save it for the honeymoon," Alice said picking me up and then I felt myself being whisked away to my room. Once in my room Alice set me down and took off my blindfold. It felt good to see.

"Alright," Alice said and I turned around to see that she looked a little sad, "I know you already took a shower but go take another one, no conditioner though either that or very little your hair is soft enough and I don't want it getting messed up tomorrow by falling out of its pins."

"Alice what's wrong," I asked concerned.

"Same thing as your mom," she sighed.

"Alice," I said going over to hug her.

"I'm alright, I'm alright," she murmured but hugged me tighter.

"Only a year."

"Yeah, I know," she sighed. "Alright," she said straightening up. "I have to go get everything ready so please get some rest for my mental sanity."

"Alice you were never mentally sane," I said shaking my head and she shrugged.

"Goodnight Renesmee, I'll miss you," she said walking out the door.

"Only a year, but I'll miss you too and it's not goodbye yet that's in 3 weeks and even then it's a see you later. I'll be back."

"See you later," she said rolling her eyes, "You've read Dear John one too many times," and with that she was out the door.

I took a shower making sure not to condition my hair too much and thought about the coming up hours. It was already the day of my wedding. I would wake up and Alice would fix me up as I just sat there. Then I would walk down an isle were Jake would be waiting for me at the other end. Then I'd be married, and I would be married to Jacob for the rest of my life.

I sighed as I lay down on my bed. This was my last night being, Miss Renesmee Cullen. Wow. I just lay in my bed waiting for sleep to take me when my phone vibrated. I reached over to my nightstand and smiled when I read the screen. Jake had sent me a text.

_'You up?_' it read.

'_Yea,' _I texted back,_ 'What are you doing?'_

'_Thinking about tomorrow and how amazing it is going to be. You know... This is your last night of being a Cullen. I mean you'll always be a Cullen and so will I, lol, but your last name will forever be Black;)'_

_'I know:) And I can't wait for that to happen! You know if Alice knew we were doing this she would kill us! lol'_

_'Yea I know, I mentally asked your dad to cover for us for just 5 minutes. lol'_

_'haha I just mentally told him thank you. This mind reading thing isn't always bad. You know I was really mad when Alice pulled me away from you.'_

_'Yeah, I wasn't too happy about that either. But she is right, we have two weeks on our honeymoon and then we go on our own for a year;)'_

_'Lol Yeah:) So what are you looking forward to most...? Besides the honeymoon and me being your wife:)'_

_'Our first dance as husband and wife. I love the song you picked by the way:)'_

_'lol I like it too;) For the father daughter dance...'_

_'lol I know you will your daddy's little girl plus just listening to that song can make a daughter cry.'_

_'Because you are a daughter and you would know?'_

_'No. lol. Because I played it for Rachel and Rebecca and they both cried so Lord knows you will.'_

"Renesmee Carlie Cullen," I heard Alice yell from downstairs and knew that I was busted. Moments later she was in my room. "What do you think you are doing?"

"Texting," I shrugged trying to look as innocent as possible then my phone vibrated again and her eyes narrowed.

"One more text," I pleaded, "Come on for your favorite niece," I said bringing out my puppy dog eyes.

"Fine," she sighed, "One more."

"Awh. I love you Alice."

"You know I've been thinking how come you only love me when I do something for you?"

I just rolled my eyes at her and looked at the text that Jake had just sent me, '_Uh-oh! Looks like the little midget busted us! haha I love you and I will see you at the altar! P.S. No cold feet right because I am more than capable of taking you prisoner;) haha'_

_'No cold feet,'_ I texted back_, 'And you know technically you will be taking me prisoner on our honeymoon and that is fine with me;) This is the last text before Alice takes my phone...I'm sooo telling her you called her a midget;) haha I love you, see you tomorrow at Burger King Right? lol'_

"Alright Alice I'm done," I told her once I had sent my final message.

"Cough it up," she said uncrossing her arms and walking over to me. She held out her hand and said, "Calm on we don't have all night, Beauty Sleep remember."

"I remember," I said rolling my eyes and giving her my phone. She had turned away and was walking out the door when I said, "Oh, Alice."

"Yes sweetie," she said turning.

"Jacob called you a midget," I said smirking.

"Thanks Hun," she said and whisked out of my room shutting the door behind her.

"Jacob Black," I heard her yell and chuckled.

Tonight would be my last night falling asleep as Miss Cullen. Tomorrow I would fall asleep Mrs. Black. I smiled to myself as I slid deep into the comforter trying to get comfy. Tomorrow would be a great day...


	14. Chapter 14 Wedding

**14. Wedding Nessie's POV**

I woke up that morning to a knock at my door. "Come in," I grumbled rolling over and shoving my face in a pillow.

"Why are you in such a grumpy mood," Alice questioned, "I let you sleep till ten thirty you should be thrilled! Jake made you bed in breakfast."

I gasped and shot straight up. "Oh my Gosh," I said getting up. "Today's my wedding day," I screamed and Alice and I start jumping up and down on my bed like little girls. "I can't believe it," I squealed bouncing onto my butt.

"Well believe it babe," she said bouncing onto her butt next to me. "Your food is on the bedside table," she said sliding off my bed and getting up, "Jake left you a note, I pre-read it. And I told him what to make you, one of the only things he can make," she laughed.

I sighed and did I back roll on my bed to my nightstand. There I found a tray with a lid and note card on it. I picked up the card and it read,

'_Dear Renesmee I can't wait to see you at Burger King;) Any way I knew you wouldn't feel like eating Alice said so too so look under the lid and you will find your breakfast. I'll see you in about 7 hours! _

_Love,_

_Jacob'_

I lifted the lid to find toast and bottled water. Just what I needed I thought. I wasn't hungry and I was too excited to eat much. I ate my toast and sipped on the water waiting for Alice to come in. I would be locked in my room until it was time and I knew it.

"Knock, knock," I heard my mom say as she walked in the door.

"Hey mom," I said smiling.

"So," my mom said sitting on my bed, "Are you nervous."

"Not yet," I admitted.

"Yet," she questioned.

"I think I will, you know right before walking down. I know it will all melt away though."

Mom laughed, "I was a nervous wreck the whole time! It was terrible! I didn't want to get married at first you know?"

"Really," I asked.

"Yea," she sighed, "It didn't get the point I guess. I didn't know how much I wanted to be married until I was married."

"Huh, well unlike you I had always dreamed of being married," I sighed.

"I'm sure you did," she laughed, "Alice and Rosalie are coming do you want me to stay and help you or help with the last few details downstairs, or," she whispered in my ear barely audible for me to hear, "I can go get details and fill you in, ya know pass letters between you and Jake."

She leaned back so I could see her wink at me. "The last one," I said smiling.

"Bella Cullen," Alice said coming through my door, "you will **not** do what you are thinking of doing."

"It's her day," my mom said.

"And I'm the wedding planner," Alice said, "Now Esme needs your help."

"Fine," mom grumbled, "I'll see you before," she said kissing my forehead and she gracefully left the room.

"Get up darling," Alice said, "we have to get to work."

"Alright," I sighed.

I got up and walked into my bathroom where Alice and Rose had put a nice comfy chair. I sat down leaned back and closed my eyes. I had given Alice free rein on my hair and makeup. She knew what I wanted. It was going to be a long day of waiting.

"Hey Alice," I said, "Go get my IPod."

_**A/N: Are you getting excited? I am! ;)**_

I had been sitting in a chair for hours. At one Alice and Rose had given me an hour break, this one planned. Then from two to four thirty they worked on me again and my bridesmaids. Poor little Sadie had to live through Alice.

I had just put on my dress. This is the part where I am nervous and feel like I am having an out of body experience. I hadn't looked in the mirror yet but I was walking to the bathroom now.

I looked in the mirror and I had to admit. I looked amazing. My dress was custom. It had a sweetheart neckline and a low back. It was a ball gown style and I felt like a princess. Throughout the skirt the silk would be bunched up in random place. There was a built in belt that was a little bow with diamonds on the right side of my hip. When you unattached the belt, however you would find that it turned into a short form fitting cocktail dress that I would wear later.

My hair was falling in curls down my back, my bangs side swiped. The top part of my hair had added volume thanks to Aunt Rose and at the back of that is where my veil was placed. My veil was very long but I wouldn't have it any other way. I was in heels of course because I didn't want to look _too_ short.

My bridesmaids where in a mint green tea length dress. The fabric flowed down and around there ribcage there was a baby blue silk ribbon that tied in a bow at their backs and the mint green flared out at the top of the blue. Since all my bridesmaids have short hair it there's was just curled.

I couldn't get over my nervous and I couldn't stop counting down the minutes. Ten to go. Oh wow. For the last half hour I'd say I had heard different people coming in and out. Aunt Rosalie had gone downstairs five minutes ago to play the piano.

"Renesmee," Alice called pulling me out of my daze.

"Yeah," I responded and then there was a knock at the door. My parents came in hand and hand and a smile spread across my face. I almost felt a little bitter sweet.

"Hi," I smiled.

"Hey sweetie," my mom said coming over to me. "You are truly breath taking," she said kissing my head.

"Thanks mom," I said my voice sounding a little horse.

"Alright," Alice said, "Let's go through are check list. Something new, dress duh. What about something old?"

"The veil," Leah said, "It was Sarah's my mom told me."

"Was it really? Ness you never told me that," Alice complained.

"Sorry," I shrugged.

"Something blue," Alice asked.

"Her necklace has the blue stones on it," Kim said and smiled.

"Something borrowed?"

"Actually Alice," I said. "Mom had told me about you letting her borrow your garter," I trailed off.

"I'll be back," Alice said leaving the room.

"Daddy," I said once Alice had left, "Have you talked to Jake?"

"Yes," he sighed. "He is a nervous wreck. Seth has been messing with him all day it's actually pretty funny," he laughed.

"Embry and Quil too," I guessed and dad nodded.

"That's what I figured."

Alice walked back into the room spinning two garters around her finger. One was the throw away garter that was thrown at the single men the other was the keepsake garter that was to be removed in "private." She came over to me. "Mid thigh," she asked winking and I rolled my eyes but nodded.

"I'm so glad you are more fun than your mom. Her's ended up at her ankle! Can you believe that," she said sliding it into place.

"Sorry," mom said shrugging, "I was a modest human."

Alice sighed, "Bella I hate to be the one to tell you this but," she trailed off.

Mom sighed, "That's my cue?"

Alice just nodded. "You really look beautiful Renesmee," she said taking my hands in hers and getting a little chocked up.

Tears started to fill my eyes, "Mom," I whined, "Don't make me cry."

"Too late," she said wiping a tear from the corner of my eye and then she kissed my forehead, went over and kissed my dad tenderly and left the room.

"Alright," Alice said. "Everyone into the hall."

We all left my room but I held on to my dad's arm and stepped back in. I needed a father daughter moment. Alice understood and got Sadie and Leon in place along with herself, Kim, and Leah. Once I had shut the door I hugged my dad close and then looked up at him.

"Daddy I will always be your little girl," I whispered and he pulled me in for another hug.

"I know," he whispered and if he were human he would be fighting back tears.

My father and I left my room arm in arm. All my human friends just thought I was really close to my brother and that was why I would dance with him and he would walk me down the aisle.

I listened as the music for my bridesmaids played and watched them slowly walk away. Then the music changed a little and sweet little Sadie and Leon started walking. I looked up at my dad and he gave my hand a little squeeze. The music changed into the wedding march and I took a deep breath and started towards the stairs.

I turned the corner and I could hear people gasp. I didn't look at them. I had a plan. First I took everything in. I looked at everyone there not paying close attention then I saw Carlisle standing at the altar being the "preacher"; Seth, Quil, and Embry; and all of my bridesmaids.

I turned the final corner so I was directly in front of the alter. That is when I allowed myself to look at Jacob. He was standing there looking at me like I was the most beautiful woman to ever walk this earth. Then our eyes met and a grin spread across both our faces.

Dad gave me away to Jacob and I kissed his cheek before he took his seat. Then I looked at Jake. We said the normal vows. Like my parents we used, "As long as we both shall live," and not, "Till death do us part." I smiled the whole time and by the time I said "I do," tears were streaming down my face and my words were barely above a whisper. When Jake said "I do," he said it with pride and with an ear to ear grin spread across his face.

Carlisle said, "You may now kiss the bride," and Jake's hands moved up to my face, gently cradling it. My hands gripped his wrist and I stood up on my tiptoes as he leaned in. It was a sweet and tender kiss and all together perfect.

Jake and I walked back down the aisle hand in hand going back upstairs. Alice's plan was to have everyone go outside for the reception and after pictures we would show up. Once Jake and I were in his room I jumped up on his bed bouncing up and down like a little girl just like I had this morning. I stood on the edge and said, "Catch me," just in time for Jake to reach out as I let myself fall off his bed.

He held me in his big, strong arms and started kissing my neck, "Mrs. Black," he whispered into my ear making me shiver.

"I could get used to that," I whispered back putting my hand in his hair and pulling his face so I could kiss my husband.

"Honeymoon, remember," I heard Alice say from the doorway.

"Go away Alice," Jake mumbled against my lips.

"You'd like that wouldn't you," she said taking his arm and pulling both of us out of the room. In the hallway my bridal party and Jake's groomsman were waiting for us and they started clapping when we came out. They all congratulated us as we walked back downstairs to quickly take pictures.

After we were done taking pictures Alice walked out onto the balcony and said, "May I please have your attention. Everyone please clear the dance floor. Thank you. Now here is Mr. and Mrs. Jacob Black sharing their first dance as husband and wife."

There were many cheers as Jake and I walked outside and then onto the dance floor. Jake pulled me into his arms as the music began and I rested my head on his shoulder. I closed my eyes and sighed contently as Jake's lips pressed to my hair and Celine Dion began to sing.

_For all those times you stood by me_

_For all the truth that you made me see_

_For all the joy you brought to my life_

_For all the wrong that you made right_

_For every dream you made come true_

_For all the love I found in you_

_I'll be forever thankful baby_

_You're the one who held me up_

_Never let me fall_

_You're the one who saw me through through it all_

_You were my strength when I was weak_

_You were my voice when I couldn't speak_

_You were my eyes when I couldn't see_

_You saw the best there was in me_

_Lifted me up when I couldn't reach_

_You gave me faith 'coz you believed_

_I'm everything I am_

_Because you loved me_

_You gave me wings and made me fly_

_You touched my hand I could touch the sky_

_I lost my faith, you gave it back to me_

_You said no star was out of reach_

_You stood by me and I stood tall_

_I had your love I had it all_

_I'm grateful for each day you gave me_

_Maybe I don't know that much_

_But I know this much is true_

_I was blessed because I was loved by you_

_You were my strength when I was weak_

_You were my voice when I couldn't speak_

_You were my eyes when I couldn't see_

_You saw the best there was in me_

_Lifted me up when I couldn't reach_

_You gave me faith 'coz you believed_

_I'm everything I am_

_Because you loved me_

_You were always there for me_

_The tender wind that carried me_

_A light in the dark shining your love into my life_

_You've been my inspiration_

_Through the lies you were the truth_

_My world is a better place because of you_

_You were my strength when I was weak_

_You were my voice when I couldn't speak_

_You were my eyes when I couldn't see_

_You saw the best there was in me_

_Lifted me up when I couldn't reach_

_You gave me faith 'coz you believed_

_I'm everything I am_

_Because you loved me _

The whole time I never stopped smiling. I did let a few tears slip but they were tears of pure and utter bliss. Sometimes Jake would pick me up and spin me around, other times my hands would travel along his back and his would travel along mine. We kissed a couple times as we danced and at the end everyone clapped and many of the guest eyes were filled with tears.

My mom had her arms wrapped around my dad's waist, her head resting on his shoulder and I knew that if she could cry she would be sobbing right now. It was written plain as day across her face. Grandma Esme, Aunt Alice, and Aunt Rosalie all looked like they would be crying too along with Kate, Tanya, and Carmen.

I had another dance planned though that was sure to bring a few tears too. I hadn't forgotten my promise to Billy and when Alice asked him to come to the dance floor a smile spread across his features. He rolled himself out onto the floor and I decided to just sit in my now father-in-law's lap. The music began and we began to roll around the dance floor.

_I can remember when you fit in the palm of my hand_

_Felt so good in it, no bigger than a minute_

_How it amazes me, you're changing with every blink_

_Faster than a flower blooms they grow up all too soon_

_So let them be little 'cause they're only that way for a while_

_Give them hope, give them praise, give them love every day_

_Let them cry, let them giggle, let them sleep in the middle_

_Oh just let them be little_

_I've never felt so much in one little tender touch_

_I live for those kisses, prayers and your wishes_

_Now that you're teaching me things only a child can see_

_Every night while we're on our knees all I ask is please_

_Let them be little 'cause they're only that way for a while_

_Give them hope, give them praise, give them love every day_

_Let them cry, let them giggle, let them sleep in the middle_

_Oh just let them be little_

_So innocent, a precious soul, you turn around_

_It's time to let them go_

_So let them be little 'cause they're only that way for a while_

_Give them hope, give them praise, give them love every day_

_Let them cry, let them giggle, let them sleep in the middle_

_Oh just let them be little_

_Let them be little_

I had let a few tears fall and Billy and Jake even let a few tears fall. I could see the pride and happiness in Jake's face as he stood next to daddy watching me dance with his father. Jake of course tried to hide his tears and only a few people saw. Mom reached over to squeeze Jake's hand as I spun with Billy. It really was a very sweet moment and there wasn't a dry I, with the vampire exceptions, left in the house.

After my dance with Billy Jake and I cut the cake. It was red velvet and delicious. Jake simply let me bite my portion but I wasn't going to make it that easy for him. I had an inch from his face and he was about to take a bite when I pulled back and made him take a snap at the air. Everyone laughed and then I shoved the cake not exactly into Jake's mouth but onto it.

Jake and I had a few things to eat but it was time for me to dance with my father. If people thought they had seen tear jerker's before then they hadn't seen anything yet. My father and I walked onto the dance floor and he pulled me into the protective enclosure of his arms.

_Spinning around on the tops of his feet_

_Smiles of the angels could not be so sweet_

_Wide blue eyes_

_And picky-tails swirl_

_She's her daddys' girl_

_Cause he knows the jokes that always make her laugh_

_He takes her for ice cream instead of her nap_

_At the end of the day by the light of the moon_

_They turn up the music and there in the room_

_And she yells_

_"Dance me! Dance me around till my feet don't ever touch down_

_There's nothin' better than bein' your girl_

_And if I am your princess than daddy_

_You are the king of the world!"_

_It's funny how life moves in circles at times_

_To think not so long ago that fase was mine_

_Houses get smaller we take different names_

_But some things in life stay the same_

_"Dance me! Dance me around till my feet don't ever touch down_

_There's nothin' better than bein your girl_

_And if I am your princess than daddy_

_You are the king of the world!"_

_Cause some day she'll go off and find a life of her own_

_Marrie a good man_

_And make a happy home_

_Until she comes back and sees with those same eyes_

_What time can not diskise_

_She walks through the door with that look on her face_

_Cause daddys' brown hair has all turned to gray_

_They talk for hours they cry and they laugh_

_Watchin' old movies and thinkin' back_

_And just as she turns to go_

_She says, "hey dad, how bout 1 for the road"_

_"Dance me! Dance me around till my feet don't ever touch DOWN!_

_"Dance me! Dance me around till my feet don't ever touch down_

_There's nothin' better than bein your girl_

_Oh no there's nothin' better than bein your girl_

_And if I am your princess than daddy_

_You are the king of the world!"_

_King of the world_

_Spining around on the tops of his feet_

_Smiles of the angels could not be so sweet._

By the time the song had finished I was definitely crying. Tons of tears, bitter sweet ones were streaming down my face. My dad and I had spun around the dance floor gracefully in perfect time with the music. It had been an absolutely beautiful moment not just for me and my dad but anyone who had witnessed it. There was no chance of there being a dry eye. I even saw Grandpa Charlie crying!

I hadn't wanted the dance with my father to end, because I was a daddy's girl. I knew it was hard for him too. Daddy's little girl belonged to someone else now. I knew he was glad it was Jake but I had grown up very fast. It wasn't too long ago that my own mother had had her father daughter dance at her wedding. Less than I decade actually.

I wanted to tell my father how much he meant to me and how much I loved him and was thankful for everything he has ever done for me. I knew he could hear what I was thinking but I wanted to say it out loud. It couldn't really be summed up into words though. So I just looked up at my father and said, "Daddy you _are_ the king of the world and I couldn't ever imagine a better father than you. Never, ever forget that. I'll dance with you anytime."

My dad had a sad smile on his face and I kissed my forehead and said, "I love you Renesmee and I'm going to take you up on that dance thing," he said pulling me into I tight hug. "You have no idea what you just said meant to me," he whispered.

I looked over at Jacob and my mom. My mom was crying into Jake's shoulder and Jake was smiling at my father-daughter moment. My mom even though she was crying tearlessly was smiling too at the sweetness of it all.

Eventually Alice dragged me away from my family and friends so I could take of the ball gown portion of my dress. Each garter was now clearly visible on my leg and when I went back outside it was time for Jake to remove it after I threw my bouquet.

All of my friends, Tanya, Kachiri, Zafrina, Senna, and Leah (who was still not married or engaged to her imprint, Max) lined up as Alice jokingly played Single Ladies. I kind of danced around to the song and did a couple of fake swings throwing them off balance for my amusement and then I actually did throw it and some of them dived at it. Leah was the one who graciously caught it and we both smirked in Max's direction. "Hint, hint," I called out and everyone laughed.

Then there was a chair brought out for me to sit in and I did. I started laughing as Alice played Hot in Herre by Nelly. I remembered reading somewhere when the groom removed the garter from the bride; this represented the bride's relinquishment of her virginity. Well we would save that for the keepsake garter. Jake slowly slid his fingers up my leg grabbed the garter and then slowly slid it down, his touch making my skin tingle.

Once the garter was finally off Jake started to spin it around on his finger and then flung it at Seth playfully. Seth had yet to imprint at least to my knowledge but once that garter was in his hands I saw him eye Malyssa. No way! I thought and then looked over to my dad to see him smile and nod at me. Seth Clearwater imprinted on my best human friend at my wedding!

I was dancing with everyone and I had even managed to pull Grandpa Charlie out for a dance before he danced with Sue once and then said he was done. Dancing with my uncles was very fun. They goofed off the whole time but had their sweet moments too. I had just finished dancing with mom and Aunt Rosalie when Alice came over to me.

"One more dance," she said and I frowned.

"Hey don't give me that look. If you want to stay here tonight and not leave for your honeymoon that's fine with me," she continued.

"Fine," I grumbled and then I surprised Alice by pulling her into a tight hug. "Everything was perfect," I whispered in her ear and she smiled.

I walked around the dance floor trying to find Jake. I saw him dancing with Rebecca and as I got closer I saw him pull her into a hug and could barely hear him saying goodbye. Rebecca started walking towards me and she stopped in front of me.

"Hey are you leaving already," I asked.

"Yeah," she said sadly, "I already said goodbye to everyone else. Renesmee I just wanted to tell you how happy I am that Jake found you. He really needed someone like you in his life. You are absolutely perfect for him. I wish I could stay longer and get to know you more but I must be going."

"Thank you," I whispered. "What you said means a lot really. Maybe Jake and I will come visit you."

"I'd like that," she said smiling. She touched my shoulder and left. I looked after her and then felt Jacob's arms wrap around me and I smiled.

"You know," I said. "Alice says we only get one more dance."

"Then come with me," he whispered pulling me out onto the dance floor.

I saw that everyone was with their wife or husband, boyfriend girlfriend, or whatever you wanted to call them. Jake and I were next to my parents and Carlisle and Esme. I could see Billy with Sue and all the wolves with their imprinties, including Seth and Malyssa. At least I wouldn't have to keep what I was a secret anymore. Alice was with Jasper and Rosalie was with Emmett. I rest my head on Jake's shoulder and smiled as the music began.

_Girl I've been waitin' on this long hard day to get over_

_So I can rest my head right here on your shoulder_

_I just wanna lay here and feel ya breathe_

_Listen to the rhythm of your heartbeat_

_And see where it leads..._

_We're wide awake but girl I wanna make you close your eyes_

_And say my name like only you can say it and hold me tight_

_All I need is only you and me alone tonight_

_I wanna make you close your eyes... Oh yeah..._

_I wanna make you close your eyes..._

_You can make me work for it girl if you want to_

_Just leave a trail for me to follow you into the bedroom_

_And if you need a little bit of help from me_

_Babe there's not a button that I can't reach_

_Let's see where it leads_

_I wanna take you somewhere... Out there_

_'Til the world fades out of sight_

_We're wide awake but girl I wanna make you close your eyes_

_And say my name like only you can say it and hold me tight... Just hold me tight_

_All I need is only you and me alone tonight_

_Yeah... I wanna make you close your eyes... Oh..._

_I wanna make you close your eyes... Oh..._

_Girl... I wanna make you close your eyes_

During our dance Jake and I just held each other tight and close gently swaying to the music. He placed a couple kisses here and there and I placed a couple on him. I didn't want this to end. I just wanted to stay in Jake's arms forever. Every moment, every second of forever. Jake kissed my forehead one more time and then my mom came up next to me.

"Come on sweetie," she said pulling on my arm.

"One more dance," I mumbled.

"I'd rather Alice not kill me," she laughed.

"Fine," I sighed. Before I left though I pulled Jake's face down to mine so I could kiss him a few times and then I reluctantly let him go.

I walked with my mom up to my room. She helped me out of my dress and stayed in the room as I got ready, just talking with me. I still had one of my garters on, the keepsake, and it was hiding from the public even in the skinny jeans I was wearing. I had on a white tank top, black leather mid crop jacket, and thigh high black high heeled boots.

Momma helped me with my hair. She pulled it up into a sexy ponytail and I changed my makeup up a little. When she was done I sighed. Even though I was only leaving for two weeks now it made me remember a longer, but needed, separation was coming soon.

"Are you ready to go," my mom asked pulling me out of my thoughts.

"Um. Well I don't have any bags," I murmured.

"All taken' care of," she smiled.

"Thanks Mom," I said pulling her into a hug.

"Awh, you're welcome sweetie," she said hugging me back tightly then she pulled back looking at me. "Have fun on your honeymoon," she said winking.

"Mom, gross," I mumbled. "I don't want you thinking of me like that! Ugh."

She laughed and rolled her eyes at me. "Like I don't know what you will be doing."

"Mom! Shut up!"

"Okay, okay," she laughed shaking her head.

"I love you mom," I smiled.

"I love you too," she said and kissed my forehead. "Alright now you better get moving. Go on, Go on," she said hitting my butt making me move.

Once I was out in the hall I saw my dad and Jake talking and laughing with each other. "Hey," I said smiling walking over to them. I walked straight into my husband's arms and my mom walked into my dad's. I kissed Jake on the cheek and he smiled down at me.

"You ready," he asked.

"Yup," I smiled. "Hold on just a second though.

I walked over to my dad and kissed is forehead and then hugged him. "Thank you... For everything," I said into his chest.

"Wasn't a problem," he said smiling down at me. I pulled away and went back over to Jake.

"Alright then. You can come down thirty seconds after we do. Have fun on your honeymoon. We will see you in two weeks. Bella and I love you guys," my dad said with a crooked grin on his face and this time instead of acting like I did I just rolled my eyes and hid my face in Jacob's chest.

"We love you guys too," Jake said laughing.

My mom and dad walked past Jake and I and down the stairs and Jake started counting. "1," he kissed my neck, "2," he kissed my cheek, "3," he kissed my forehead, "4," he kissed my collarbone, "5," he kissed my lips and stopped counting. After a while we pulled away from each other. "Come on," Jake said taking my hand and pulling me with him.

We walked down the stairs and through the open window we could see all of our guest waiting for us outside, bubbles and rice in hand. The line started at the end of the porch steps and went all the way to the limo Jake and I would be riding in. We opened the door and everyone started clapping and cheering for us.

I saw my mom holding Grandpa Charlie's hand with daddy's arm around her waist. Charlie also had his arm wrapped around Sue's waist and Sue was holding Billy's hand. Seth was standing with Malyssa his arm wrapped over her shoulder. He really moved fast, well I guess she would just be comfortable with him really.

Jake tugged on my hand and we ran through our friends who were throwing rice at are heads and blowing bubbles in our faces. I couldn't help but laugh. This was fun. When we finally got to the limo Jake got in the open door and I turned to wave at everyone but felt Jake's big hands grab my waist and pull me in. My squeals of delight filled the air.

Once we were in the limo we opened up the giant sun roof and told the driver he could go once our heads were out. Jake and I stood up and waved out of the roof, people, vampires, and werewolves still throwing rice. Only the vampires and werewolves still hitting us. I continued laughing and waving and yelling out my goodbyes. Once we were out of sight I went to sit back down and Jake did too.

"You ready for our honeymoon," Jake asked.

"You have no idea," I smirked leaning in to kiss him.

_**A/N: Please, please, please review! This chapter is important so it would mean a lot! Sorry it took so long. I'll try and update as often as possible but with school starting I don't know how frequent it will be... Tell your friends please:) P.S. There is also a link for the website where I was looking at garter information and a link to help u visualize how Nessie's dress came apart...**_


	15. Chapter 15 Honeymoon

**15. Honeymoon Nessie's POV**

When we arrived at the airport I didn't look to see where we were going. It probably wouldn't do me any good so I didn't bother. On the plane I slept wrapped in Jacob's arms in the wide first class seats. That was only the first plane there were 3 more after that.

Jake and I laughed and talked the whole time. We just enjoyed each other's company. By the time it was twenty four hours we had been married we had finished our final flight and we were driving somewhere in a place I didn't know.

I finally caved and asked, "Where are we?"

"I thought you didn't want to know," he turned to me smirking.

"I don't," I grumbled leaning my head on Jake's shoulder and he chuckled.

"Your dad said once we were on the boat it was thirty minutes."

"And when do we get to the boat," I asked.

"Now," he smiled pulling into a harbor.

"Oh," I said felling dumb.

Jake carried our bags and put them on one of those fast boats. "This is ours," I questioned.

"Well the whole families actually," he shrugged, "your dad told me about it and I know how to use a boat. I mean when Charlie doesn't go fishing who do you think takes my dad."

"Oh," I sad again.

"Come here," he said setting down all the suitcases and sitting down at the wheel. I walked over to him and sat on his lap and sighed contently. It took a little less than thirty minutes and I could see an island. It was dark now; it had been for a while.

We pulled up to a small dock and got out, getting our suit cases as we did. We walked down a path hand in hand and then we came to a house. All the lights were on so it lit up the night sky.

It was in the jungle but I could see the ocean on the other side of the house. It was only one story. Jake opened the door and tossed in our bags. Then he lifted me up and I squealed in delight as we walked over the thresh hold. Jake kicked our bags and carried me to a room in the back of the house.

When we walked in I saw that the room was a dark red. The bed frame and all the other furniture was black and the bedspread was also the dark bloody red. The room itself was mysterious and sexy. Jake kicked our bags to a corner and kissed my cheek.

"Hold on," I told him.

"What," he said pulling back.

"I'm going to take a shower alright?"

"Okay," he said and gave me a quick kiss.

"Alright maybe I won't take a shower," I said not wanting to wait any longer. "I'll just go change," I said winking and jumping out of his arms.

I grabbed my suitcase and walked into the connected bathroom. There was a double sink, Jacuzzi tub, and a shower big enough for two. I took of my clothes and stood naked looking in the mirror. I still had on my garter and I decided to fix my makeup and my hair.

My hair was still pretty curly but I quickly ran a brush through it letting it fall freely down my back. I had taken off my entire make up after the first plane ride and had none on. I decided to just put on some dark red lipstick that tastes like strawberries. It was made to not come off when you kissed so there was no need to worry about it ending up anywhere on Jake.

I walked over to my suitcase and started looking at all of its continents. I grabbed a black lacy thong and put it on. On top I had on a piece of black lingerie. It only covered the front. There were low cut cups that pushed my boobs up with a string in between the cups. Sheer fabric hung down to my belly button and there was just one string holding everything together. I slipped on a pair of black high heels and walked to the door.

I put my hand on the handle and took a deep breath then I turned it and it swung open. I saw Jake standing at the wall of glass sliding doors, his hands pressed to the glass. He obviously was deep in thought and I didn't care that I was about to disturb it.

He still had on the tight shirt he had worn earlier and he had traded his jeans for basketball shorts. With his hands pressed up against the glass I could see his wedding band on his finger and it made me want him more than I ever had before. I quietly walked over to him and slipped my arms under his putting my head on his chin.

I then pressed my lips to his neck and said, "You know you haven't even looked at me."

"Are you sure you are ready," he asked and I was a little confused, we had talked about this.

"What are you not," I trailed off.

He snorted, "That's not what I asked."

"More than ready," I said and was going to say more but was interrupted.

Jake had turned around saying, "That's all I needed to hear," and with one look at me made him groan. He lifted me up off the ground and I wrapped my legs around his waist. We had already begun kissing passionately and hungrily. I want him and need him and felt like all the feelings I had had for him before were more intense because I knew I would be getting what I wanted.

Jake's lips moved to my neck and my fingers moved to the hem of his shirt as I gasped for air. My lungs were on fire and I honestly could care less. I started pulling his shirt up and he helped me get it off of him. Once his shirt was off I flung it somewhere, I didn't even know where.

My lips had found their way back to his and I could feel Jake's hand roaming my back as mine clutched his. When his hands found the string on my back with one tug it was gone and Jake pulled my top off tossing it somewhere.

The feeling of just being skin to skin with him was amazing and made my skin tingle. My skin burned where he touched and I still hadn't had enough of him. Jake started walking backwards and then I felt myself landing on the mattress and for some reason I let a groan slip when Jake's lips pressed to my collarbone a thing they had done a million times.

"Jake," I whispered as I gasped for air trying to get enough oxygen to my head.

"Yes," he said his breathing ragged.

"Let's get under the sheets and scoot up so I can take off your shorts," I gasped and that was the last thing I remember "saying" or my last full sentence. After that I was completely lost in him...

_**A/N: Tell me what you think on that part and the rest... Please;)**_

I woke up the next morning with my head on Jake's chest. I could feel his hand stroking my hair and rubbing my back. Our naked bodies were still intertwined and I was utterly content. Since my hand was on Jake's chest I told him how content I was then sighed as I felt his lips press to my hair.

"I love you," he whispered.

A smile spread across my face and I turned my head propping myself up on my elbow to look at him. "I love you too," I said leaning in to give him a good morning kiss. "Are you hungry," I asked guessing that he probably was. He just chuckled and nodded his head. "Alrighty then," I sighed getting up.

I saw the shirt that Jake had been wearing laying in a corner and went and picked it up to put it on. Then I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth, comb my hair and put on my "Mrs. Black" underwear. Jake came in a second after and he was wearing his basketball shorts. I wonder how many of those he packed. When we were done brushing our teeth I asked Jake to take me to the kitchen.

He picked me up in his arms and we started walking towards the kitchen. "So," he said, "You are okay right," he said setting me down on my feet.

"What do you mean," I asked turning to look at him.

"It's just," he sighed looking embarrassed. "Well I know your dad _hurt_ your mom and with you being half human I didn't know if," he was going to continue but I cut him off with a kiss placing one of my hands on his cheek.

"Jake, I'm more than okay. Really," I said smiling.

"Good, now what are you fixing me for breakfast."

"What makes you assume I'm fixing you something you should cook for me," I said trying to hold back a laugh as he looked at me like I was crazy.

"Have you lost your mind," he said sitting down at the table.

"I was only joking," I said rolling my eyes at him and getting out the eggs.

"So do you like the island," Jake asked.

"Yeah, I um... Was just wondering where did you find it?"

Jake laughed, "Well your parents bought it and Esme redecorated it."

"When," I asked stopping scrabbling the eggs and turning to look at him in shock.

"Well you know when Esme, Emmett, and Jasper went on that 5 day hunting trip," he said trailing off.

"You've got to be kidding me," I said turning back to the eggs, "Just those three did it in 5 days!"

"No. It was more like 3 and the Amazon coven helped out along with your 'Cousins,'" Jake said using his fingers as quotation marks.

"Oh, well I guess that makes since," I trailed off putting eggs on both of our plates. I sat down and we both ate quickly and with conversation. When we were done I put the dishes and the dishwasher and went to sit on Jacob's lap.

I kissed him and right before he was about to deepen the kiss I pulled away. "What are you doing," he asked trying to keep his grip on me.

"I have to take a shower," I said shrugging and getting up not wanting to move from his arms.

"Can I come," he asked.

"Yeah, I mean we are married," I mumbled smirking and walking back over to take his hand. "Come on," I said taking his hand and pulling him up. We walked through the hallway and when we got to the bathroom I didn't want to take my clothes of myself. I was still holding Jake's hand so I showed him images of him taking my clothes off, again.

Once I did this I saw Jacob shut the door in the mirror and saw a little grin spread across his face. I saw his head lean down and his lips press to my neck. I also saw my reaction. My head tilted back so he could have more room for his lips to roam and my lips parted as I took in the essence of Jacob.

I watched his hand slowly move to the him of his shirt that I was wearing. I felt his finger on my hips and I saw my shirt slowly being lifted up. Once my shirt was off Jacobs lips moved to my collar bones and his hands slipped under the hem of my "Mrs. Black" underwear slowly sliding them down.

My breath was already ragged and our lips hadn't even touched yet. Once my underwear was on the ground I turned around and jumped up, straddling his waist, kissing him. Jake set me on the counter and my hands slid from his hair to his shorts, tugging at them to get them off.

Once they were finally off I felt Jake chuckle as he kissed me. "What's so funny," I murmured as my lips skimmed his chest and shoulders.

"I thought we were going to take a shower," he said pressing his lips to my neck as I gasped for air.

"Forgot," I said grabbing his hair and pulling his face down to mine making him moan. I kissed him more ruggedly then wanting and needing him more than even last night. I felt myself being lifted up from the counter and guessed that Jake was taking me to the bedroom but I then felt myself being pressed against the tile of the shower.

Jake's hand that had been in my hair moved away but his left hand remained wrapped around my upper thigh. A few moments later I felt the shower turn on above our heads as we kissed. Jake let me down and his hands went from my thigh, over my butt, and rested on my lower back pulling me closer.

My hands clutched to his back and I was feeling a little lightheaded. His hands moved away from my body but after a few seconds I felt them in my hair with some on them and a small smile spread across my face as Jake began to kiss my jaw. I guess I was going to take a shower but Jake was going to clean me...

After our shower Jake and I laid in the hammock outside until it was dark. We talked about how we couldn't stay home the whole time unless we wanted to hear a bunch of sex related jokes. We were going to layout all day tomorrow and then the next day we would start exploring the island. We may even go to the mainland once or twice, just for picture and video proof.

Being with Jacob was pure and utter bliss. I was just so in love and my life was so perfect. Even if my life wasn't perfect as long as I had Jake I would be okay. My life couldn't be better. I had just had the most perfect day with my husband.

I was just so relaxed and comfortable in Jake's arms. We just lay in that hammock for hours. His arms were wrapped around me the whole time. Sometimes we talked and sometimes we just feel into a comfortable silence listening to the waves. At one point we even took a little nap and woke up in time for the sun set.

I didn't want my honeymoon to end but this day had gone by so fast and I was afraid the rest of it would pass just as fast. I found comfort in knowing that even if the honeymoon was over soon me and Jake would be on our own in a while. Even after that I knew since Jake and I would live forever we could take vacations like this anytime we wanted. It really sucked that we had to sleep.

Jake was asleep now and I was wrapped in his arms. I hated that we had to sleep and eat. Things would be so much simpler for me if I was a full vampire. At least we both slept though and not just one of us. That would really suck. I sighed and snuggled closer into Jacob's side. I had learned how to turn off my power and how to control it better but at night I would leave it on in case Jake wanted to watch my dreams because I knew he loved too.

I drifted off into a peaceful sleep and all of my dreams consist of Jake and me. The next morning when I woke I was still in Jacob's arms and he just held me until both of our stomachs were rumbling. Once we had brunch we put on our bathing suites and headed outside setting up the video camera and regular camera in case we needed them.

We took a few pictures of us laying on the sand and some of us kissing, but I was more interested in taking pictures of him and he was more interested in taking pictures of me. After that we made a short little video and went for a swim in the ocean.

We went pretty far out and I got to swim with dolphins and look at the beautiful coral reefs. It was so pretty here, just perfect. I couldn't think of a more magical place for Jacob to have brought me.

After our swim when we were back towards the shallow it was sunset and Jake and I had been splashing each other goofing off for some time. I swam over to him and pushed him under because he could stand where we were at and I couldn't. After pushing him down he came back up and grabbed me in his arms.

"I won," I said mockingly.

"I don't care," he mumbled bringing his face down to mine. We kissed in the water and by the time we reached the shore neither of us had clothes on we were both breathing raggedly. He didn't even try to make it to the bedroom we just stopped right there in the sand, we fell asleep there too.

The next couple of days were full of us just enjoying each other's company and exploring the island my parents had given us. We would stop to take pictures and we would take videos too. Before we knew it a week and four days had passed and we only had three days left at this wonderful place.

That night as I was in the bathroom putting on some hot pink lingerie Jacob knocked on the door. "Can these last couple of days just be me and you? I don't care if we don't even leave this bedroom Ness. I just don't want to take pictures anymore."

"Good," I said opening the door, "I'm tired of taking pictures too." I walked over to him placing my hands around his neck and tilting my head back so he could kiss my neck. He took the hint and started to kiss my neck and undoing the strings of the tight corset I was wearing.

For those next three days we left the bedroom to eat or lay on the beach together. If I wanted to take a shower Jacob willingly came with me. During our whole trip I don't think I ever took my own clothes off and I don't think he ever took off his. I really didn't want to leave.

I woke up the morning we had to leave and I could feel Jake's hands rubbing my back. My cheek was resting on his chest and I groaned rolling over to lay on top of him my face buried in his chest.

He chuckled, "What's wrong," he asked and kissed the top of my head.

"I don't want to leave," I grumbled into his chest.

"Me either," he said rubbing his hands across my bare back.

"Then please explain to me why we half to," I asked him.

"Because we promised everyone we would come back for a week. Plus we will have to get settled in to the new house after that. There just isn't time right now, but don't forget we are going to live forever."

"That's true I guess," I said leaning my forehead on his chin. "Can't we stay a little longer though," I whined.

"Awh Nessie don't do that to me," he said.

"Fine," I grumbled looking up at him. I guess we need to get ready don't we?"

"Yeah," he sighed. "How about a quick shower first," he said with a smirk on his face.

After our "shower" Jake and I packed up all of our things and put on actually clothes for the first time in weeks. His was his usual tight shirt dark jeans getup and I dressed casually also. I put on a one shoulder zebra t-shirt and some cut up shorts with some silver gladiators. At one of our stops I would put on a leather jacket, skinny jeans, and pumps so I wouldn't look out of place when I got home.

Jake and I turned off all of the lights and we were walking hand in hand back to the boat. "You ready to leave," he asked pulling me into the comfort of his arms.

"No," I mumbled into his chest.

I felt him kiss the top of my head and then he pulled away putting our bags on the boat. I wasn't ready to go home and I didn't want to go home but I knew there was no point fighting it, I had to go home. Jacob helped me into the boat and I sat on his lap. As we pulled away I sighed knowing I wouldn't be back for a while. I was going back home for a week then leaving for Vanderbilt were Jake and I would live on our own but the part that had me worried was the going back home. I really didn't want to have to put up with Emmett...

_**A/N: Okay people so this was something very new for me to right about... I hope I did well; your feedback is greatly appreciated! Tell your facebook and twitter friends about the story so they can comment to! If you are reading this you truly are the best! Love, Always in My Memory!**_


	16. Chapter 16 Homes

**18. Homes**

_**A/N: I'm so sorry! Groveling is at the bottom!**_

"Nessie, honey wakeup," I heard Jake murmer as his lips pressed to my forehead. "We are home." My eyes started to open and I groaned into Jacob's chest.

"I'm tired," I said sleepily and Jake laughed then I heard Emmett's laughter from inside the house.

"Helloooooo," Emmett screamed opening up the door letting the sunlight into the car.

"Emmett," I complained shoveing my head completly into Jake's chest hiding my eyes from the sun, "You are so annoying."

"Get over it," he said and I could hear the smile in his voice. "Come on get out of the car. I'm even getting your luggage," he said and I could hear him taking steps to the back of the car. "I'm also going to look through it," he said laughing evily.

I shot up right away jumping out of the car. "Emmett don't," I yelled at the top of my voice. "Aunt Rose help," I whined trying to stop Emmett from unzipping the zipper.

Suddenly Rosalie was behind Emmett and she smacked him on the back of his head. "Hey," he said letting go of the bag and looking back at Aunt Rose. "What was that for?"

"Leave her stuff alone," Rose said crossing her arms. Jake was now at the back of the car and we both quickly grabbed our bags and shut the trunk.

"Hey now," Emmett said looking and the closed trunk.

I rolled my eyes and Jake grabbed my hand pulling me along with him to the house. Jake opened the door and there was Alice.

"Nessie I've missed you," she sang pulling me into a hug.

"Alice, air," I squealed.

"Oh sorry," she said pulling back and smiling sheepishly. "I've missed you," she stated simply.

"I know I've missed you too," I smiled then I saw my mom coming down the stairs.

"Mommy," I squealed sounind like a two year old.

"Nessie, get over here and give me a hug," she said and flashed down the stairs in a blur. I ran over to her and she oulled me into her arms. "I've missed you," she whispered into my ear.

"I missed you too Mom. Dad get your butt down here," I yelled when I spotted my dad stnading at the top of the staircase smiling at the scene in front of him.

He ran down the stairs and picked me up giving me a kiss on the cheek as he spun me in a circle. "I missed you baby girl," he said putting me back down.

"Dad," I said rolling my eyes but smiled at him and thought, "_I missed you too_."

Jake talked to my parents as I greeted the rest of my family. I guess my dad thought I was paying attention as I greeted Jasper but I over heard him thanking Jacob for taking care of me and keeping my best intrest at heart. By that I guess some how he had got wind from Jake's thoughts that he made absolutly sure that I was ready before anything was "done."

After we had been home for about an hour Uncle Emmett spoke again after a scolding from Aunt Rose. "So do yall have any video from your trip or is that I stupid question to ask?"

My dad scolded Emmett with a stare but I just smirked and said, "Of course we do Emmett." Jake and I were sitting on the loveseat, me snuggled up into his side, so I told him to go get the tapes.

Daddy put it in and the first thing you saw was me standing at the waters edge in a hot pink bikini, the one that is now somewhere i the ocean I might add. The frame shook a little, Jake adjusting it on the tripod, and then he ran up to the waters edge and stood next to me pulling me in for a kiss. You saw my pull back and wave at the camera then blow I kiss. Jake and I walked back to the camera and before turning it off we said, "Hey everyone. Just thought we'd say hi."

It then cut to a shot of me holding the camera above my head so it was looking down on me and Jake. "So," I began on the video, "we are somewhere in the jungle on the island that mom and dad bought us and over there," I moved the camera to show a large cliff, "is a cliff that we are going to climb. Jake's going first," I said bringing the camera back to my face then Jake stuck his face into the shot kissing my cheek.

The camera cut off and when it turned back on Jake was starting to climb the cliff. He was a couple feet up when you saw me throw somwthing at him to make him fall back down. "Hey," Jake shouted on the video. "I couldn't resist," I replied. I continued video taping Jake quickly climb up the cliff and then you see everything flying by as I through the camera up to him.

Jake pointed the camera down at me and I looked up and waved to him then I blew him a kiss. "There's my wife," Jacob said proudly on the video as I started to climb the cliff. When I reached the top Jake reached down with one hand to help me up, it wasn't exactly like I needed it but he is always a true gentleman.

"Wow," I said on the video. "Jake show them the scenory." The camera turned away from my "starstruck" expression to the wide, open ocean at sunset. I remembered that view. Although you couldn't see it on the video I remembered Jacob reaching over to take my hand. I could remember leaning into him and having him kiss my hair. The video turned back to us as Jake angled it correctly and we waved goodbye. Then the video cut off. I remember what happened that night though on that cliff. I made love to my husband.

I looked over at my dad he was smiling at the screen. Over the years my mom had gotten better at shielding peoples thoughts and could do it without getting uncomfortable or really thinking about it. I asked her when my wedding was getting close, and dad would get a sick look on his face when I remembered kissing Jacob, to block both mine and Jacob's thoughts when we got back from our honey moon. She obviously was by my dad's happy expression.

The video cut to a video of me in a hamock in one of my bikini's. I was asleep. I didn't know that Jake had taken this video so I watched cloesly. Jake spoke then, "So we were just laying in the hamock and just like that she is fast asleep. I've tried to tell her that _sometimes_ she snores but she never believes me so Nessie, here is your proof." Jake stoped talking then and you could hear let snores come from me.

I started laughing. "Okay I get it I snore sometimes," I yelled and grabbed the remote to fast forward through the video. It was one I had taken that Jake didn't know about. The radiow was playing in the bathroom it was one of my c.d.'s from when I was oneish. I was walking in our bedroom going toward the music of "Heart and Soul" from Camp Rock 2. I started laughing even though I had been there in person to see it.

You could see Jake in the mirror and singing, "If you've got heart and soul, you can rock and roll," at the top off his lungs. "Hey," Jake said as everyone else joined in on laughing at him. "That is so not fair," he yelled.

I just shrugged as the tape cut off. "I love you," I said giving him the puppy dog look.

"Whatever," Jake said rolling his eyes, but I could tell he wasn't really bad bacause he had a tiny smile on his face.

We started talking with the family and I eventually fell asleep on the couch in Jake's arm's around six only to wake in a room I had never seen before. Well actually it was just like the room where Jake and I had spent the last couple of weeks but I knew that it wasn't that actual room.

"Hey honey," Jake whispered in my ear and then kissed behind it.

"Where am I," I asked.

Jake chuckled, "They gave us a house. I would love to say I am surprised I mean I wasn't expecting it but it is just so _them_," he sighed. "Anyway it is _exactly_ like the house on the island."

"Really," I asked intreged. "Oh, and by them do you mean my parents or everyone?"

"Well this time it is everyone," he said shaking his head and smiling. "You sure do have a hell of a family."

"You do too," I said putting my hand on his cheek and smiling up at him with love and admioration.

How did I get this lucky? I have had and am leading the most perfect life anyone could ever imagine. My parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends, and everybody else I know and love are the absolute best! I don't know what I would do withput them. I married and am in love with the most wonderful man who ever walked this Earth and by some absolutly amazing, incredible miracle he loves me back just as much.

"How did I get this lucky," I whispered while looking into is beautiful eyes.

"I was just thinking the same thing," he whispered back and leaned down to kiss me.

For the next five days I spent all day with my family. Trying to soak everything in and getting tips about the real world and what to expect. One of those days Aunt Alice, Aunt Rose, Grandma Esme, Mom, and myself went shoping and bought me a whole new wardrobe for college.

On the 28th, well actually the 29th Jake and I said our goodbyes to everyone early in the morning/ late at night. It just depended on how you looked at it.

"I'm going to miss you so much you little moster," Emmett said pulling me into a tight hug and then messing up my hair.

"Emmett," I whined and Aunt Rose came over to fix my hair while Emmett went to say good bye to Jacob.

"Thanks Aunt Rose," I said smiling at her.

"Come here," she said pulling me into her arms. "I love you sweetie," she whispered in my ear.

"I love you too," I said pulling back.

"You know," Jasper said to me as Rose walked away and went to hand Jacob a present, "I'm glad one of us gets to live in the south. You will love it there I promise," he said smiling warmly and then giving me a quick hug.

"I'm sure I will," I said smiling back at him.

"Come here, come here," Alice sang waving me over to her. She pulled me in for a tight hug and then pulled back and looked me in the eye, still holding onto my arms. "You have to promise me that you will always dress perfectly," she said smiling at me.

"I promise," I said rolling my eyes. "Did you really ever expect anything else from me though?"

"Nope, that's why I love you," she said and kissed my forehead.

After Alice left Grandma and Grandpa walked over to me. "We are going to miss you so much," Carlisle said pulling me into a tight hug. When he let me go Esme pulled me into her arms and said, "I don't have anyone to cook for now."

"Well if you wouldn't mind sending me your cookies and brownies every now-and-then that would be great," I said smiling at her and getting a little teary eyed as Carlisle kissed my forehead and Esme kissed my cheek.

"I'll miss you sweetie," Esme said placing her hand on my cheek.

"As will I," Carlisle said putting his hand on my shoulder. Then they walked off letting mom and dad come over to me. I so wasn't ready for this.

"You grew up so fast," mom said pulling me into her arms and then I felt dad's arms wind around both of us.

"It's going to be so different without you here," mom continued.

I pulled back and looked at both of them. "I know it will be different but don't forget we are going to live forever. So this will seem like a couple of days and you can always visit don't forget that."

"We wont," dad sighed. "It's just you aren't in ribbons and pigtails anymore."

"Dad," I said rolling my eyes, "I never wore ribbons or pig tails."

"It's a figure of speech," he said kissing my forehead.

"Well go on," my mom said, "You want to visit Charlie before you got to Tennessee."

I kissed both of my parents cheeks and hugged them tightly letting a few tears roll down my cheek. "I love you both. You two are the best parents anyone could ever ask for."

"We love you too," my dad speaking for them both and wiping a few tears from my cheek.

"You ready," Jake asked sliding next to me and slipping his hand in mine.

"Yeah," I said looking up at him and giving him a weak smile. He kissed my hair and walked me over to the passenger door of his car. We didn't really have any bags only one shared one, my purse, and our laptops, chargers, and phones. We weren't bringing any clothes or furniture. Alice had taken care of the clothes. Everything we had bought for me the other day she said would already be in my closet, and Esme had decorated and bought the furniture.

I stuck my head out the window and waved at everyone yelling out "Goodbye," "I love you," and "See you later." When I could no longer see my family I slumped back in my seat, held Jacob's hand, and let a few tears roll down my cheek.

"Are you sure you want to leave," Jake asked frowning at me.

"Yes I'm sure," I smiled at him and gave his hand a squeeze of reasureance. "I just hate goodbyes."

"Oh, I see," he said and leaned over to kiss my cheek. "You'll see them again."

"I know," I smiled at him. "So are you ready to see your dad, Charlie, and the pack."

"I guess," he said. "You know I haven't shifted since we've been married because I know they'll be like, 'So how was the honeymoon,' and I don't want to take the chance of letting my mind slip and letting them see you in a way only I should you."

"Have you seen, um the other imprints, in ways you shouldnt have," I asked not wanting to know.

"Not really. We are all very protective of your thoughts about our quote-on-quote love-life. I've seen glimpses of heated moments, but nothing too personal."

"Oh thank God," I yelled throwing my head back onto the headrest.

Jake just chuckled and turned on the radio. We had a pretty long drive ahead of us to see the rest of our family and then and even longer drive to Tennessee after that. The song "DJ got us Fallin in Love Again," by Usher was playing. Jake and I both started to laugh because we didn't _really_ fall in love on the dance floor but that is where we both first _showed_ our love for one another.

We got to La Push in time to have lunch with Billy. I never really understood how wise he could be. There was something about him that said "Cheif" just like there was something about Jacob that said "Alpha." They both scrame "Leader." Billy gave us advice about married life and it was nice to hear.

When we were done at Billy's we went down to the beach were everyone from the pack was waiting. Of course all of the guys asked how the honeymoon was but really that was to be expected. I chatted with the girls because I hadn't reaaly got the chance before at the wedding. When it was time to leave to go to Charlie's (and Sue's, yeah they live together can you believe it?) for dinner I had to go through my third round of goodbyes for the day.

We went o Charlie and Sue's and laughed and had a good time. I can't believe I hadn't heard this already but after Jake and I left the reception Charlie purposed to Sue and when the returned home they got married at the courthouse! So we all talked about the first couple weeks of married life and they wished us goodluck in Tennessee. I said my fourth set of goodbyes and then we were of to Tennessee.

I had fallen asleep in the car on the way to Tennessee. It was now about two p.m. and the sun was shining in Cheatham County. I saw the turn of that went into the woods and started down the long drive way. Jake was asleep in the passenger seat we had switched a couple of hours ago. I shook him gantly and he woke up.

When everything cleared I saw our house or country mansion. It was white and looked like it was three stories tall. The drive way made a circle but I stopped the car and got out. I walked around and walked into Jacob's arms looking on in awh. There were about ten acres off cleared out land and hills then there was more woods. I know mom said we had fifty acres for privacy reasons but I didn't think it would be this nice.

The windows on the front of our house were rether wide I guess. It had a plantation essence to it with a big and wide front porch. There were four white colums that went up to the roof. The house was also very wide.

I took a deep breath and walked forword, towards my wonderful, beautiful home. Jake opened the large door. I gasped when I saw the inside. There was a large grand stair casethat once it got to the second level split off, wrapped around and then there was a spiral staircase that went up to the third storie on the oposite side.

To the left of us was our amazingly large living room an den. It was closed of to the foyoure but only by a wall. The wall didn't have any doors which made everything roomy. To the right was the dining room and the kitchen it was all closed off too. Nothing though felt small because the house was _huge_.

When you went up stairs there were only two rooms. One one each side. They were exactly the same. On one side of each room was a bathroom and on the other side was a big closet. The bed was in between two windows that looked out onto the grounds.

Jake and I went up the spiral staircase to our room next. Then you reached the top you were in a little square area with a door on either side of you and a window behind you. If you went through the right door it was a massive bathroom suite and if u went through the right door you would enter a closet the same size of the bathroom, already stolked with clothes.

When you went through the door in front of you you entered our room. The walls were a brown color that made the room warm. The bed was a cream color with brown and light blue details. On each side of the bed were large windows and there was also a smaller window over the bed.

The view looked out over our land. The house was at the top of a hill and at the bottom there was a lake which was amazingly crystal clear. You could see a field of wield flowers on top of one of the hills and ther was a little garden at the back of thouse just off the backporch.

I turned to Jacob not really believing what I was seeing. "Can you believe this is all ours,"I asked still in awh.

"No, but why don't we break the house in," he said taking me into his arms and laying me down on the bed.

_**A/N: I am sooooooooooooooooooooo sssssooooorrrrrrrrrryyyyy! I know it has been forever since I updated over a month and I feel soooooo bad! I started high school, I have cheerleading, I coach, and I'm sorry but my papers for school over rule this! I honestly feel terrible about not updating if you are an avid reader of this story! I promise I will try and think about the story more! Promise! I hope you can forgive me and add the story to your favorites, alerts, and please, please review! If I get a bunch of e-mails saying 'some one just added a comment' ect then it will obviously be on my mind to write. Also tell our facebook friends, twitter ppl, etc to read the story as well! Like I said the more e-mails I get the more it will be on my mind! It also makes me remember that yes some people are actually reading and enjoying my story and that inspires me to keep writing, so do it for yourself not just me! Please forgive me and review! This isn't the best chapter but it is one of those that has to be there. I didn't have as much detail as I usually do because I really wanted to give you something to read! You deserve it!**_


	17. Chapter 17 Twists

**Chapter 17. Twist**

Jake and I had fallen in love with our house. It was about fourty-five minutes away from Nashville for an average human but for us, if we took some back roads, it was only about twenty minutes. Before school started Jake and I did "touristy" things. We went to Bridestone arena to see a few concerts, we went to the Grand Ole Opry to see Brad Paisly and Carrie Underwood. One night we even went to Coyote Ugly which was an experince to say the least.

We started at Vandy on August 7th. I was majoring in Psychology and and Jacob was majoring in Mechanics, real shocker there. Life was amazing! Jacob worked with the Metro Police Department but they had him doing stuff at Fort Capmbell.

He loved being a police officer. People had told him that before Metro was political and cut throat as you got higher up on the chain. Chiefs would lie, everyone would lie and baisically it was pretty shity and wrong. That had changed when three police officers some with a higher rank than just officer filled a lawsuit and one.

Since your classes were at the same time we were able to always see each other except for when he was at work, which is when I would clean the house or hangout with some new friends. We had found a church when we moved down here and met some really nice people.

All of our friends couldn't believe we lived where we did. At first it was hard for us to belive too. I couldn't imagine a better life. As I walk through the woods I'm thankful my parents bought so much land for me to hunt but really there is only deer which is only good every once in a while. Today is Saturday October 14, 2017 and I'm just laying in bed when I feel sick and run to the bathroom to puke my guts out.

I tried calling Jaob but he wouldn't answer. I hadn't had any bad food I thought to myself. So why am I so sick I mean it's not like I could be pregnant. Could I? My thoughts were interupted when my phone started singing "Mine" by Taylor Swift. It was Jake.

"Hello," I answered carefully.

"Hey is something wrong," he asked but by the sound of his voice he didn't sound happy.

"No nothing is wrong. I'm just a little sick, I don't know why I called it's no big deal," I told him.

"Are you sure you are fine I mean I'd offer to come home but things are crazy down here. Something about a new something being passed and they are calling me in for something in an hour that they said I can't miss," he said sadly.

"I'm fine honestly. You'll be home for dinner right,11' I asked because if I was pregnant that is when I would tell him.

"I should be. I'll call and let you know if I wont be though."

" 'Kay. I love you Jacob," I said sweetly.

"I love you too Renesmee. I'll be back later," he said and then the phone disconnected.

My mind was going a million miles a minute! Was it even possible for me to be pregnant? Was it? My periods have been irrotic for the past couple of years so there was no way for me to know if I missed one. Oh my goodness.

I ran to the master closet and put on some daisy duke shorts, grabbbed my boots, and through on a kind of see through flannelish Abercrobi top. I ran a bush through my hair and ran downstairs to grab my keys, because I was going to the store.

I went to the local Wal-Mart but it was really about twenty-five minutes and for most of the ride I had to go the actual speedlimit. It really was to bad I couldn't read mind and be able to know where the cops were.

When I finially made it to the store I decided I would do some grocery shopping. It never hurt to have some extra food with Jake being my husband plus if I was pregnant I would want to make a nice dinner to tell him. I also didn't want to just go in to buy I pregnancy test I mean can you talk about looking lame!

So at a slow human pace I walked around picking up spices, food, and deserts. When it was time to look for the pregnancy test I figured I should go look in the pharmocy area. It was definitaly a section I wasn't really used to. I had only had my period three times and even then Esme and my mom had went to the store to get me what I needed and it only lasted three days each time.

When I gave up and couldn't find it I decided I had to ask someone where it was. I saw an older lady and decided that she looked nice enough so I walked over to her.

"How can I help you," she asked when I walked over to her.

"Um well I kind of think I'm pregnant and well," I trailed off.

"So you need a pregnancy test," she said finishing my sentance.

"Yeah," I said shyly and blushed.

"Sweetie it's nothing to be imberessed about," she said toughing my shoulder, "It's a natural part of life."

"Thanks," I said back simply.

She walked me over to where they were and pointed them out. "Thank you," I said and then reached up to take one with my left hand.

"If you don't mind me asking, its just I see that you are married and you seem young, do you think your husband will be excited," she asked a little shyly.

"He will be thrilled if I am. There has always been a very slim chance that I could get pregnent. So if we got pregnant on accident it will be a mircle," I said smiling.

"Well then I'm happy for you. Good luck sweetie," she said smiling and started to walk away.

"Thank you," I said quickly.

She turned back and smiled at me, "That's my job."

I quickly grabbed the pregnancy test and went to check out. This is one of those times I wish I lived in Forks. Sure Ashland City was a small town but I had less of an oppritunuty to use my vampire speed here. I raced home wanting to take the test.

When I finally reached our house I put all the groceries away and went upstairs to the bathroom in my room. I peed on the little stick and then it said I had to wait five minutes. I decided that instead of just pacing around I should be productive. I got all the dirty clothes and went downstairs to the laundry room, which was underneath the grand staircase.

I got the wash going and started going back up the stairs. I wanted to run up them but I controlled my pace. When I reached the bathroom I took a deep breath before I looked at the test.

Thats when I saw a little pink plus sign for positive waiting for me. I dropped the test as one hand went instinctivly to my stomach and the other to my mouth. I was actually pregnant and with Jake's child! Our daughter or son when be so beautiful if they took after Jake. Wow, I thought to myself, you are going to be a mom.

I left the bathroom and picked up my phone and called my dad's cell. He answered after the first ring. "Is something wrong," my dad asked frantic.

I laughed, "No nothing is wrong crazy! Everything is perfect," I sang into the phone.

"Oh," he said sounding relived. "This isn't the usual time you call."

"Well is mom there," I asked.

"Yeah she's right next to me, why?"

"Just put it on speaker," I demanded.

"Okay what do you want Ness," my dad asked getting _very_ curious.

"Guess what!"

"What," he sighed impationtly.

"I'm pregnant," I scrame and then laughed with delight.

"Oh my gosh," my mom scrame then picked up the phone. "Your pregnant," she asked and I could hear the "tears" in her voice.

"Yeah," I said and then started to cry tears of joy myself.

"Oh sweetie, I wish I was there," she said happily. "This is absolutly amazing honey!"

"I know," I said the tears still falling, "and I wish you were here too! What does dad think."

"Oh, sorry. When you said you were pregnant I mentally sent him away. I wanted a mother-daughter moment. I'll get him," she told me.

"I can't believe my baby girl is having a baby," he said sadly but I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Daddy," I whined and he laughed. "You two are going to spoil this kid rotten," I laughed.

"You bet," dad said and then I heard my mom, "Does Jacob know?"

"No," I said smiling and shaking my head, not like they could see though.

"And why not," she asked.

"Because he is at work. "I'm going to make him a special dinner and stuff."

"Well then I want keep you. Can we come tommorrow, I want to see you!"

"Of coure you can! Anyone who can," I told her.

"Okay. Bye. Love you, baby."

"Love you too Mom," I said and as she went to hang up I heard my dad go, "Alice what was that," but at the moment I was to happy to care.

I ran downstairs and started to make dinner. Jake would be home in about thirty minutes and I was going to make his favorite. British meatpie and mashed potatoes. As the steak for the meat pie was cooking I went upstairs to get dressed.

I put on a tight red dress that zipped up the front. I had on some black underwear and some black heels. I couldn't decide how to do my hair so I left it as it was, a little messed up but super sexy.

Since the dress was super short my legs looked like they were a mile long! I was so glad I still had my body! I put on some darker eye makeup and I gave myself red lips and added blush.

I went downstairs and finished off the food, but put it in the stove to keep it warm. I got out some candles and turned on some music then turned off the lights so everything was lit by candle light. That's when I heard Jake's tires hit the driveway and in vampire speed I out all the food out.

I heard Jake shut his door and then he slugheshly made his way to the door. I couldn't help but think, "Come on you have a pregnant wife in here." When he got to the door I opened it for him and there was a huge smile waiting for him.

He looked upset but when he saw the smile on my face he smiled back and said, "Well look whos all dressed up," and then he kissed my forehead.

"I made you dinner," I said taking his hand and walking him to the tabel.

"Wow, you really went all out," he said looking impressed.

"Just for you," I said and kissed his cheek.

He helped me into my chair and then went to sit in his chair. We started to eat and I noticed he still looked upset. "Did you have a bad day," I asked him being upset upseting me.

"Terrible," he grummbled.

"Well," I said and I guess he thought I was prying for more because we both said, "I have something to tell you," at the same time.

I smiled at him but only got a tiny smile in return. "You first," he said.

"Well," I stalled and looked up at him through my lashes. "We... Are... Going... To... Be..."

"You are killing me here," he said looking at me in the eye.

"I'm pregnant," I said and then stard beaming in delight.

Jake's eyes bugged out of his head and then a huge smile spred across his face. "Really," he asked.

I just nodded my head tears streaming from my eyes and I couldn't stop smiling.

Jake stood up and walked over to me. He picked me up in his arms and spun me around as my shrills of delight and wonder filled the air. He put me down and kissed me then he cradled my face in his hands and said, "You are absolutly amazing." He just held me in his arms until his stomach growled and we sat back down to at quickly. You could see the wonderment in his face and I assumed I had looked like that earlier.

That's when I remembered he had something he had to tell me. "Jake," I said breaking his train of thought, "didn't you have something to tell me."

His face instantly clouded and I got worried. "Jacob what's wrong," I asked.

He looked at me with a pained expression. "They somehow because I'm a cop and I;m 'trained' and work at Fort Campbell. They enlisted me. I didn't know it was possible. I didn't think they could do that. It's not fair, it's not right and it just has to happen now of all times."

I stopped his rambling. "What are you talking about? I don't get it."

"Some how they enlisted me in the army. I have to do one tour. I leave tommorrow," he said staring into my eyes.

My breath caught and it took me a second to make since of his words. Tears formed in my eyes but these weren't of joy. "You are leaving," I whispered and he nodded. "Tommorrow?" I got another nod and then I asked me final question, "How long?"

"Eight and a half months."

I burst into tears and he was at my side instantly holding me. He didn't calm me with words he just held me close. I could hear his perfect heart beating in his chest. Jacob, my Jacob was leaving for eight months. How was I going to survive and make it?

"I was thinking the same thing," he told me and thats when I realized my power was on.

We enterd our bedroom and he put me down but wouldn't let go off me. That was the right thing to do because I just wanted him to hold me. The longer I stood there a little bit of logic came back to me. We should make the best of our last night together for eight months because those months would be one thing. Hell.

I slowly moved my hands down his back and I found the him. I slipped my fingers under and this is when he realised what I wanted. After I got his shirt of he put his lips on mine full force and helped me slide his pants off.

As he kissed me his hands found the zipper on the front of my dress and he pulled it down. When my dress was off his hands wrapped around my waist and I jumped up and wrapped my legs around him. His lips were hot on mine and then his fingers found the clasp to my bra un-hooking it. We made your way to the bed.

We didn't sleep all night. In between making love to each other we talked. I didn't want him to leave because I wasn't exactly sure how I was going to survive.

"I don't know how I'm going to do it," I said. My head was on his chest and I was looking at him.

"Me either," he said shaking his head and closing his eyes.

"I'm going to be all alone," I said sadly.

"No you wont," he said shaking his head, "You have your family."

"Yeah a lot of good they do when they are in Portland."

"You weren't going to stay here where you," he asked looking in my eyes.

"Oh, I never thought about going back."

"I don't want you in this big house all by yourself."

"I'll go back with them tommorrow," I told him.

"Good," he said and kissed the top of my head.

"Where you really excited about the baby," I asked shyly.

"Of course," he yelled. "It's absolutly amazing! I wanted kids but I didn't think it was possible so I never got my hopes up but I'm going to be a dad and it is one of the most amazing feeling in the world."

I smiled up at him and I understood why people always said pregnant women "glow" because we do. You can tell from our smiles that we are pregnant. I just layed in Jake's arms and thought. That's when I realised Jake would be going into a war zone. He could get hurt and then our child wouldn't have a father.

"Jacob," I whispered and Jake heard the distress in my voice.

"What is it honey," he asked consierened.

"Promise me you will come back," I said barely able to spit it out.

He pulled me up into his arms, holding me tighter than before. Then he lifted my head so I could look in his eyes, "Renessme Black, I promise I will come back."

I sighed and then started crying into his chest. Jacob held me and sushed me. He kept smothing out my hair and kissing my forehead trying to get me to calm down. It was hard though. This wasn't supposed to happen. It shouldn't have worked like this.

He didn't deploy until twelve but we had to be there at elleven. So at nine o'clock we decided to write each other a letter. We had to wait at least twelve hours before the other one could read it.

So we both sat out on the porch and started to write. Mine read:

_Dear Jacob,_

_Wow, I can't even comprehend what I am doing right now. I'm writing a letter telling you goodbye. I've never done this before, obviously but I couldn't imagine being an army wife all the time. _

_One thing that scares me the most is that sure, the wives miss the husbands. The thing is though, our bound is just so much stronger than that. We aren't your typical couple Jacob. I don't want to be alone. I'll never know if you are safe or missrable. I'll be stuck wondering._

_This may sound selfish but as I am the one worrying about you, I want you to be the one to comfort me as my tears fall. I'm not going to lie Jacob, I'll be crying while you are gone, but just remember that I'm safe. As long as I am with my family I am safe._

_You promised to come back and I am going to hold you to that promise. Your baby can;t grow up without a father. I can't wait to see you as a dad. You were ment to be a dad Jacob. You are just so, I'm at a loss for words really. You are more than perfect and I have no clue what I did to diserve you._

_It has never really crossed my mind that I live in the world of supernatrul. When I was young I though a lot of people could just shift into wolves on a whim. Only when I started school did I figure out how utterly lucky I actually was. _

When other people would complain about there life I would think, I don't have any of those problems. Sure my life isn't perfect but it is the best ife a person could ask for. It really is and my mission in life that I've been working on for a while know, is to try to be the best person I can possibly be. For you.

So I feel like I deserve you. I know you will think that is crazy and I'm sure your letter says something similiar we can debate it when you come home though. It would be amazing if you were here when our child is born.

I don't care if it's a girl or boy because no matter what our baby will be absolutly perfect. I can't wait to see our baby in your arms and I can't wait to be in your arms again.

I love you with every fiber of my being,

xxxxx Renesmee Black xxxxx

I kissed the page a couple of times then folded it up and put it in a envelope. Jake finished his too. I went out to his car with him so he could get all the army stuff he needed that they gave him. Then we walked to our big closet.

Over the past couple months I had got some army shirts from Ft. Campbell. I put one of those on, some jean shorts, and then some gladiators. I didn't put on any makeup because what was the point? I didn't pull my hair up because Jake wouldn't like it that way today.

When it was time for us to leave I wrote a quick note tellingmy parents where I was but I was sure they knew. Jake and I rode in his truck so I could be closer to him. We drove for what seemed like hours and got there right at eleven.

There were already tons of people there. A lot of families and everyone had the same looks on there face. A look of loneliness, I couldn't help but to feel like mine over powered there's though.

They had food and everyone at least had a drink so Jake went to get me something. I clung close to his side as we talked to other families. I asked for advice and everyone was very kind because they knew what the first time was like.

When the famlies started to seperate off to say there goodbyes I began to cry. Jake held me close and I had my head on his chest. He cradled my face and made me look up at him. "I love you so much," he said looking in my eyes and my tears continued to fall. "And I love your baby already too," a sob broke through my chest as he said this and he pulled me back in close to him.

As I was crying into his chest I could hear a lot of people enter, but quietly. Then I hear my mom gasp. I wanted to look up but I knew she would see the heart break in my face and I didn't want that for her.

When I finally did look up I saw my dad, mom, Emmett, and Alice. My mom was loding onto my dad looking at me with sorrow in her eyes. I tried to smile at her but failed and turned my face back into Jacob's chest.

I felt m dad's hand on my shoulder and I heard him say, "Come here sweetie." He had to pull on me a little but I turned and cried on him. My mom talked to Jacob and was "tearing up" herself. If she hated this she should think of how I feel.

My dad held me tighter when he heard me think that. Alice talked to Jacob and then Emmett. As Emmett talked to him you could hear the brotherly love behind it. When my dad went to talk to him he gave me to my mom and we cried together.

I felt so weak. I was used to being strong but right now I wasn't. Dad watelling Jacob to be safe. You could hear a brotherly ness, a friendship, and a father son sort of thing in his words.

When dad was done I went back to Jacob. He would hold be close and rock me back and forth. Then I would look up and he would kiss me softly and tendorlly. Then someone came over the intercome and said, "All soldiers board."

Another sob broke through my chest and I pulled Jake's face down so his lips could touch mine one last time. When we both pulled away I gave him my letter and I had my dad take mine. He kissed my forehead and I cried as I watched him walk away.

I felt like part of myself was missing and it was. I looked on as he got on the huge plain and I waved to him as my head rested on my dad's chest and I held my mom's hand. I couldn't believe I was here. I was an army wife. Like that wasn't weird.

I watched the plane take off and I continued to cry. Mom and dad walked me to the volvo and ALice and Emmett got Jake's truck. I sat in the back and my mom held me as I cried. One thing I remember her saying is, "I know how much it hurts to be the one left behind. You have an advantage though. You know Jake loves you and is coming back."

When she saw that I saw my dad's eyes tighten and he almsot broke the wheel. We got to my house and the truck was already there along with Carlisle's mercadies. Mom told me goodbye and left with Alice and Emmett.

Dad went to get a few of my things and then we left. That father-daughter car ride was just what I needed. Sure I was never really fully myself but I did laugh which was amazing. My father knew exactly what to do and say.

I would like to give the credit to the whole "mind reading" thing. Really though it was just the fact that he was an absolutly amazing father and I waas incredibly lucky to have him.

After a 3 day car ride (becaude my father drove the speed limit and we stopped everynight, shocker) I was home. I went to my old room then my dad set down the letter Jake wrote me.

It read:

_Dear Renesmee,_

_I am totally and completly in love with you. I hope you know that, I hope I express it enough and that I tell you and show you enough. If I don't I am sorry and I will as soon as I get home._

_Know that there will not be a moment when I am not thinking about you. That you will always be on my mind, always. One thing I know though is that you are safe and that is more comfort then you would know. God bless your family, my family._

_I don't want you to worry or cry but I know you will because that's just you. I love you for it but if I'm not there to comfort you for it then, well, I don't know. Just try not to be sad. Can you do that for me?_

_You have to take care of yourself; for me, the baby, your family, and anyone who has ever been blessed enough to know you. Make sure you eat enough because I know some pregnant women don't because they are afraid about getting fat. You will always be perfect Renesmee, always._

_I don't know how I became so incredibly lucky. I don't, because God knows I don't deserve you.I want to be everything you nedd and want. I want to be able to protect you and hold you. Comfort you and keep you safe and healthy. I never want to stop holding you._

_I love you with everything I am,_

_Jacob_

Tears of course were falling but I didn't care. I laid back in my bed and fell asleep without Jacob next to me. This was my third time and it hadn't got any better. This was going to be hell.

_**A/N: Luck at how good I did:) Less than a week! See I am being so nice and isn't this one juicier! I didn't want to do the typical get married then get pregnant thing so I added a little twist! I hope you like it! And if you knew you will be nice and review and tell your friends to review! Please, please, please! I don't want to have to be one of those writers who says 20 reviews or no new chapter because I think that is unfair but I'll do it if I have to!**_


	18. Chapter 18 A Moment of Hell

Chapter 18. A Moment of Hell

These past few months have been one thing. Hell. They could be worse I do know that so I guess the better thing to say would be that these past three months had been hellish, not hell.

I don't know what I would have done if it wasn't for my family being there. They were the only people who could make me smile. After I had been back home for a couple of weeks I went to visit my friends in Tennessee who were kind of wondering what happened to me. I told them Jake was sent out and that I went to be with my family because I didn't want to be alone and pregnant. They completely understood and promised to come see me this summer.

I was sitting in my room. Some days were worse than others and this was one of those bad days. I heard my dad come in and then he slipped his arm around me. "You miss him," he said and I laid my head on his shoulder and nodded.

"What do you miss the most,?" he asked.

"The simple things," I said, "Waking up in his arms, falling asleep in his arms. His smile and laugh. Him making me laugh. Daddy," I sighed. "I haven't laughed in a long time," I said looking up into his eyes.

"I know," he said sadly and kissed my forehead.

We sat like this for a while. I was just thinking of memories and my dad was listening to them when my phone rang. "I'll get it," I told him and I walked over to my night stand.

"Hello," I said.

"Hello," a deep voice said on the other end, "Is this Mrs. Black."

"This is she," I said, "Who is this?"

"I am from the army and I'm sorry to inform you that there has been an accident."

My heart stopped my whole world stopped. The phone fell from my hands but I didn't hear it hit the ground because my head was throbbing along with my heart. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think. Nothing mattered any more. I went into shock for a couple of seconds and then there was just pain.

I had never felt pain worse than this. I bent over and I thought I was going to throw up from all of the pain. It was an out of body experience and I couldn't tell if I was screaming all I knew was that I wanted to. Tears were coming fast and hard from my eyes and I shook violently with my sobs.

When my head cleared partially I could feel cold hard arms around me. "Shh. Shh. It's okay," my mom was whispering in my ear.

How could everything be okay when everything I lived for was just taken from me. Jacob wasn't here anymore and I would never see him again.

"No honey. You have it all wrong," my dad said rubbing my back. I was to confused and in to much pain to respond.

"He is alive and okay. He got shot, but because of what he is everything is perfectly fine. He is in perfect health and they are giving him a three day leave. One day is travel, one day is here, and the next day he has to go back but you get to see him. He will be here for the whole day and and part of the night," my dad told me softly.

I started to feel better. Jake was okay there hadn't been a reason for all that pain. If I just would have listened to the man! "It's not your fault. They shouldn't start with that because all the wives freak," dad told me. I remembered the pain I had just went through and I started to cry on my mom's shoulder and my dad went to get my phone which was ringing again.

"Hey. No, no. It's fine. Yeah let her have a second," my dad said into the receiver and then turned to me. "Its Jake," he mouthed.

I jumped of from where I sat and ran to get the phone. "Just talk," I said because I just wanted to hear his voice. I wanted to know for sure that he was okay.

"I will be there tomorrow I promise I'm about to get on a plane now. It will be bright and early I promise. I love you so much. My plane lands at ten A.M. I know you will be there waiting and ready. I miss you so much. Can I hear your voice now please?"

"I love you. I didn't know how much pain I could feel and be in. I, I thought you had died Jacob."

"Stop, stop right there," he said comforting me. "I promised you that I would come home in one piece. I'm already healed. How's the baby?"

"Good I guess," I said and then on the other end I heard them call his flight.

"I have to go. I love you and I will see you tomorrow," he said.

"I love you too Jacob," I told him and I heard him send me a kiss through the phone and then hang up.

I crumpled into my dad's arms. I didn't want to tell him goodbye when I had just been so scared that he had died. My life would be gone. I don't know how I would have gone on. I don't know how I would have survived each second of everyday. Because really I wouldn't have been able to do it.

"Shh," my dad whispered. "Don't think like that. He is fine. You will see him tomorrow. Carlisle is going to give you something to help you sleep until you have to get ready." I was glad because sleep would be just what I needed.

I woke up the next morning by mom shaking my shoulder and myself being completely out of it. "Come on you have ten minutes to get ready before you leave. I've been trying to wake up for the past twenty minutes," she told me stroking my hair.

I got up and walked into my closet connected to my room and then after I got my clothes and then I walked to the bathroom. I took off what I was wearing, my parents had I assumed put me in pajamas, and I was standing there naked. I put on some clean underwear and a bra, my boobs had gotten a little bigger since I had got pregnant, and I looked in the mirror.

My stomach was bigger and there was a little bump where my baby boy or girl was growing. I was showing but not to much because I had only just entered the second trimester. I put on some jeggings and some cream colored boots and then a cream and brown colored sweater dress. I put my hair in a low ponytail and out on some blush and chap stick because I was running out of time to get ready. My rings were always on and that was the only jewelry I wanted to wear today.

I ran down stairs were my parents were waiting for me. They were the only ones going everyone else was going to wait for Jake and I to get back. I walked past my parents and straight to the Volvo because I was ready to go. My parents got in without saying a word and my mom reached back to take my hand.

My dad drove quickly to the airport. He could tell how ready I was to see Jacob. I had really missed him and at the moment I was kind of in a daze just waiting to see him. Waiting for him to revive me. When we pulled up to the airport I tried to stay calm. I waited for my dad to walk and open my door for me and then I walked at a normal human pace.

When we were in there I knew I had ten minutes to wait. I didn't know what flight Jacob was but my dad told me. I sat down and closed my eyes waiting for my dad to tell me when his flight landed. When my dad finally whispered those words to me I got up and was waiting eagerly with some other people to see their relatives.

I was standing there just counting the seconds. After 283 seconds Jacob turned a corner. His eyes where searching for me and when his eyes locked on mine a huge grin spread across his face. "Jacob," I whispered and then started running towards him. I think I made some kind of alarm go off by going past some barrier but I couldn't find it in my self to care. When I got closer I jumped into his arms and breathed a huge shuttering sigh.

It was hard to believe that I was finally in his arms again but I couldn't think of a better place to be. My left hand was in his hair and my right arm was under his arm and I was clinging tight to his shoulder with my head on his shoulder. "Don't let go," I whispered shakily and Jacob's arms wrapped tighter around me. His lips pressed into my hair and he whispered, "I love you." Tears were streaming down my face as I felt Jacob start to walk again.

He was in his uniform so I guess that explained why everyone was clapping. The return of a soldier to his wife. No one had come ti say anything about the sirens I made go off and I assumed daddy had taken care of that. One of Jacob's hands was stroking my hair while the other was rubbing my back. I didn't want to loosen my grip on him. I wanted to be in his arms forever.

We ended up in the parking garage where the car was parked. My dad unlocked the car and Jacob ducked in, never breaking his grip on me. He sat down and I laid my head in his lap. We just looked into each others eyes. I had come so close to losing him and when he had to go back it would be even worse this time.

My parents hadn't said a word so I assumed they were giving us our privacy. Mom would be too upset and distressed to put her shield up but it didn't bother me. I felt like someone else needed to know what I was feeling. I didn't want my dad to suffer but he could help me later by knowing what I am feeling.

When we got to the house I was finally ready to talk but I knew the other would want to talk to him too. I had made the "grown-up" decision to let everyone else talk to him first. I had no interest in hearing about what happened in the war zones. I knew everyone else was going to want to hear so I would just have Jacob cover my ears.

Jake and I got out of the car and we both wound our arms around each other, never letting go and walked inside. We opened the door to the house and everyone was waiting. Esme ran over to him and wrapped her arms around him, "I'm glad you made it home safely," she said to him and he nodded and said, "I'm glad I did too." Everyone took turns talking to him and then Emmett asked, "Tell us what it was like over there."

Jacob just knew I wouldn't want to hear this and he gave me a look that said, "Do you want me too." I nodded and dragged him over to sit on the coach. He sat down first an I was in between his legs. I told him to cover my ears and he placed his hands over both of them, blocking all sounds, and he kissed my forehead.

I placed a hand on each of his wrist and just held them there as he started to talk. Eventually I let my hands wonder up and down his for-arms and then anywhere I could tough. Just making sure that him being here wasn't a dream or my imagination. I concentrated on feeling him breathe beneath me, knowing that I was in his arms and he was safe. My face probably had some blank expression, one of calmness maybe or a look of contentment because I was in his arms once again because that was comfort enough.

I didn't know how much time was passing because I simply wasn't paying attention to that. Eventually he kissed my forehead and brought me out of my daze. I looked around and saw that everyone had left and it was about three o'clock. Where had the time gone? "I love our family but I want t be with only you for the rest of my time here," he whispered in my ear and I couldn't agree more.

We went outside and went on a walk in the woods. We talked and I laughed like myself for the first time in months! I hoped that some of the laughter, my parents and the rest of my family could here because they hadn't heard me laugh in months. I wanted them to know that "me" was somewhere inside of me, it was just I had to have the other part of myself back to act like myself. I wanted them to know I was happy, for a little while anyway.

After sunset we went to our "house." I hadn't even kissed him yet. We were looking up at the stars through our window. His arms were caressing my stomach, our baby, and my head was resting on his chest. I turned around in his arms and started kissing him, softly first but the passion grew.

Jake's arms wondered down my sides and to my thighs then back to my back where he pulled me in closer. I jumped up and wrapped my legs around his waist. His hand rubbed up and down my bare legs and my skin had a tingle where he touched. It had been to long since I had been with him, and far to long since I've been like this with him. Our relationship definitely was NOT about the sex, not that it wasn't good because it was, it was just we loved each other for who we were. I had missed him so bad it hurt like hell and I had also missed being like this with him.

I had already taken off my boots and jeggings so I only had on my sweater dress. I hadn't really realised Jake had been walking so I was caught off guard when I went flying down onto the bed, letting out a squeal of delight. Jake slipped his fingers under my dress and started pulling it up.

I slipped my hands under his shirt and felt his perfectly muscled stomach. His skin, as always was hot. I slowly ran my fingers up and down his stomach and chest as he kissed me. I took off his shirt and then his shorts. He started kissing my neck, one of my favorite things, which made my skin tingle and my back arch into him. He kissed me from my head to my toes and then some. Eventually I fell asleep in his arms for the first time in months.

_**A/N: I will love you if you review!**_

I woke up the next morning and stretched out in bed reaching for Jake then I remembered he wouldn't be there. I started crying into my hands. Yesterday was so blissful. Jacob had been home, I had fallen asleep in his arms again but I didn't wake up next to him. I could feel the ache in my heart a longing for him...

I felt cold arms slip around me. It was my dad. "Jake left this for you," he whispered into my ear and giving me a DVD. He got up to leave but I needed his comfort. "Don't leave," I whispered and was suddenly enveloped in my father's arms were I cried for a while.

I eventually put the DVD in. Jake came on the screen and a few tears left my eyes again. He was at what I assumed to be his base camp. "Hey honey," he said smiling into the camera, "I just thought I'd share a few things with you and I thought I would tell you that I love you and I'm thinking about you every second of everyday. Stay strong and I'll be home soon."

Tears were streaming from my face when Lonestar's, "I'm Already There," started playing and pictures of Jake and his friends over there started showing.

_He called her on the phone_

_From a lonely cold hotel room  
Just to hear her say I love you one more time  
But when he heard the sound  
Of the kids laughing in the background  
He had to wipe away a tear from his eye  
A little voice came on the phone  
Said "Daddy when you coming home"  
He said the first thing that came to his mind_

I'm already there  
Take a look around  
I'm the sunshine in your hair  
I'm the shadow on the ground  
I'm the whisper in the wind  
I'm your imaginary friend  
And I know I'm in your prayers  
Oh I'm already there

She got back on the phone  
Said I really miss you darling  
Don't worry about the kids they'll be alright  
Wish I was in your arms  
Lying right there beside you  
But I know that I'll be in your dreams tonight  
And I'll gently kiss your lips  
Touch you with my fingertips  
So turn out the light and close your eyes

I'm already there  
Don't make a sound  
I'm the beat in your heart  
I'm the moonlight shining down  
I'm the whisper in the wind  
And I'll be there until the end  
Can you feel the love that we share  
Oh I'm already there

We may be a thousand miles apart  
But I'll be with you wherever you are

I'm already there  
Take a look around  
I'm the sunshine in your hair  
I'm the shadow on the ground  
I'm the whisper in the wind  
And I'll be there until the end  
Can you feel the love that we share  
Oh I'm already there  
Oh I'm already  
There  


By the end I was balling my eyes out. There had been I little video here and there in it. A lot of picture of him and his troop, I guess would be the right term to use. Then there had been some pictures of us. There was the one from the night he proposed, the night of prom. Some random ones I didn't know had been taken while we were engaged. Ones from when I was younger. Our wedding day. Us in our new house. Then it ended on one that was taken the day he deployed. It was taken from the side. Our foreheads were pressed together and I was on my tiptoes with tear streaming down my cheek. We were looking into each others eyes and our hand were intertwined by our sides.

After the song ended with that picture I thought it was over but Jake had a little bit more to say. "I hoped you liked that. I wanted you to know I'm doing alright considering. Just stay safe I'm sure I don;t have to worry about that with ole Edward around though," he chuckled. "I love you and I know it's going to be hard, but I'll be back soon. Then we will have a beautiful baby girl or boy we can raise together. I love you Renesmee," he said and then the video cut off. He was right this was going to be hard...

_**A/N: Look I know it took a while but I'm up at eleven thirty finishing this and I have to get up at six tomorrow. For some people that may not be hard for you but when you will be outside all day it stinks! I also worked on this chapter at a cheerleading competition at six flags! I just wanted to let you all know how dedicated I am! School papers come first but if I'm putting all the effort in **__**reviews would be greatly appreciated! I may sound like a bitch right now but like I said it's late, I'm tired. You know I love you all so R&R and tell your friends! If you are reviewing I love you! And huge shout out to **_luv2beloved _**who has reviewed on every chapter! I of course love ALL my reviewers but if I get a bunch of e-mails with your pen name then you get a shout out too! And wont that make you feel special ;)**_


	19. Chapter 19 Rolling with the Punches

**Chapter 19. Rolling with the Punches Edward's POV**

_**A/N: Look Edwards point of view! You may get one more of these later on in the story but enjoy this one because it is a rare treat! It's the last chapter plus some that Nessie doesn't see...**_

I was laying in bed with Bella after another blissful evening. I felt guilty sometimes for being so happy when my daughter was miserable. At the beginning she was doing pretty good. We can't get her to laugh, sometimes she will crack a smile. It hurts Bell and I to see her like this. Our baby girls is suffering and there is nothing we can do.

I don't want to even think about what it would be like if something happened to him. There relationship is the same as mine and Bella's. If one of us is gone, your body may be here but really we are gone too. It's painful. When Renesmee was younger we would have tried to keep going for her if something happened to the other, but not now that she is grown. Even then maybe not because she has had Jake since the day she was born.

I sighed. I went into Nessie's mind. It was one of those days where all she wanted to do was stay in bed. I couldn't really blame her but I would have to go and get her moving a little. I flashed down the hall and went to her room. I slipped my arm around her and said, "You miss him," and I felt her nod on my shoulder.

"What do you miss the most," I asked her.

"The simple things," she said, "Waking up in his arms, falling asleep in his arms. His smile and laugh. Him making me laugh. Daddy," she sighed. "I haven't laughed in a long time." She looked up at me then with those big brown eyes that she got from her mother and the look broke my heart into a million little pieces.

"I know," I said sadly and kissed her forehead.

We sat for a good fifteen minutes. She was thinking about him, happy memories and I couldn't bare

to take that away from her. She thought of their first kiss, him proposing, their wedding, a little of her honeymoon (she didn't think detail which I was grateful of), their life in Tennessee. I could tell she wanted to go back. She wanted to feel somewhat normal. I could tell. As she was thinking about riding on his back through the woods her phone rang.

"I'll get it," she told me and she walked over to her night stand.

"Hello," she said.

"Hello," a male's voice said on the other end, "Is this Mrs. Black?"

"This is she," she answered, "Who is this?"

"I am from the army and I'm sorry to inform you that there has been an accident."

I saw all the color in my daughter's face drain. She became whiter than me and her heart skipped a couple of beats. I was frozen for one sixtieth of a second and I watched as the phone fell from her hands I reached out to grab it and took a deep and unneeded breath before talking. "What happened,"I said bluntly.

"I'm sorry but who are you," the voice on the other end said.

"I'm her father. Now tell me what happened. Actually just tell me if he is okay because my daughter is having a panic attack right now and she is pregnant."

"I'm sorry sir," he said. "Jacob is okay. He has healed from the shot remarkably well. There is one every blue moon who does. He was lucky. We are giving him a three day leave. It started today but he is traveling, then he should have one day where ever he chooses, and then he must travel back."

"Thank you. I would recommend not starting the sentence that way next time."

"Well this happens to everyone, but point taken," he told me and I hung up and looked at my daughter. She was having a panic attack and she couldn't breathe. I could hear Bella outside the door and everyone was wondering what happened. They all would have heard the change in her heartbeat and my conversation. I listened to Nessie's thoughts and then stopped abruptly. All she was feeling was agonizing pain.

I told Bella come in and she gasped when she saw Renesmee just standing there gasping for air. She had a knowing look about her and I instantly felt regret and remorse. I had left her. She had thought that she lost me before and that was what was happening to her own daughter. Our instinct was to protect and comfort her.

We guided her to sit on the bed and and Bella put her arms around her trying to comfort her but Ness couldn't feel her or hear either of us. She was so lost in the agonizing pain. She bent over and about through up but then she started to scream a couple of times. While she screamed Bella and I just looked at each other helplessly.

When she was done screaming we tried to comfort her. She was in a daze and numb. She was sobbing violently and shaking. It took a while for her to register Bella shushing her and telling her everything was okay and then she thought, "_How can everything be okay when everything I live for was just taken from me. Jacob wasn't here anymore and I would never see him again_."

"No honey. You have it all wrong," I told her sitting down and rubbing her back. She just looked on confused so I went on. "He is alive and okay. He got shot, but because of what he is everything is perfectly fine. He is in perfect health and they are giving him a three day leave. One day is travel, one day is here, and the next day he has to go back but you get to see him. He will be here for the whole day and and part of the night," I told her softly.

She felt instant relief and then regret, "_If I just would have listened to the man,_" she thought.

"It's not your fault. They shouldn't start with that because all the wives freak," I told her. She thought of the memory and turned to cry into Bella's shoulder. The phone began to ring again so I went to answer it.

I picked it up and heard Jake on the other end, "Hey it's Jake. Is it okay that I called right now? Is she doing okay?"

"Hey. No, no. It's fine. Yeah let her have a second," I said into the receiver and then turned to Ness. "Its Jake," I mouthed.

Ness jumped up and ran to get the phone. She took it from my hands and whispered, "Just talk." She listened to his every breathe he took, every word, and every sound he made. She lost herself in his voice finding relief in his words.

When he asked to hear her voice she said, "I love you. I didn't know how much pain I could feel and be in. I, I thought you had died Jacob."

Jacob stopped her and comforted her and then they said there goodbyes and I love yous. Once she hung up the phone she fell into my arms and began to shake with her tears. I held her close and mouthed to Bella to go get Carlisle to give her something to make her sleep. I whispered to her trying to comfort her. "Shh, Don't think like that. He is fine. You will see him tomorrow. Carlisle is going to give you something to help you sleep until you have to get ready." Carlisle walked in with Bella behind him and he pressed the needle into her arm.

I laid her down under the covers and kissed her hair. Bella kissed her on the cheek and we left the room. When we went down stairs we were loaded with questions. Everyone was concerned for Renesmee. "Jake got shot. She thought he died," was all I said and I pulled Bella close. I remembered that knowing look on her face. She had been in that place before. I had been in that place before too, but that was my fault. It was my fault for her pain and mine because if I just would have stayed we never would have had to gone through that.

Everyone went quite. They were all thinking of the big _what if._ What if Rosalie died, Emmett would be a mess. What if Alice died, Jasper would be a mess. It went vise versa and the same went for Esme and Carlisle. None of us would know how to help or comfort each other. To live an eternity without one another would be horrendous and a challenge we didn't plan on facing.

After we were all getting sentimental we all went on our own, alone. I wanted to be alone with Bella. To tell her how sorry I was for hurting us both so long ago. I wanted to remember how very lucky I was. I didn't want to take a single thing for granted. I wanted to be with the love of my life.

We left the house hand-in-hand and then she hopped on my back like when she was a human. She doesn't have to anymore, but we both like it. I ran like the speed of light. I wanted to go _home_. I wanted to go back to Forks were I first met Bella even if it was just for a few hours. I wanted to go to our meadow and lay there with her in my arms. I wanted to forget, even if it was momentarily, any pain that I had seen or remembered today. I wanted the sun to rise as we laid there but that couldn't happen.

We arrived in Forks about mid day. When we arrived at the mansion Bella got off my back and we went inside. Everything was covered in white sheets. Bella went straight for the piano and took the sheet off the bench and piano itself. "Play for me," she whispered. I sat down on the bench and Bella sat down next to me. I began to play her lullaby. I could write thousands of songs but this one would always be our favorite, with Renesmee's coming in with a close second.

As I played Bella let me into her mind. My head flooded with memories. It started with the first time she came to the house. How I had played for her and she cried. Then there was the tour of the house and how strange the thought it was that I didn't have a bed. Next there was the first time she was my room with the bed. I saw her confusion and the horror she saw in the room. I laughed and looked down at her and she smiled back at me. Then it was the first time _she _stayed the night with me. Then there was the memory over her finally agreeing to marry me.

I stopped playing abruptly and turned to kiss her. I pulled her into my lap and after set her on the piano as I stood up. She wrapped her legs around me and I unbuttoned her Calvin Klein silk long sleeve top. It was one of the tops I loved to see her in it was the same blue as her old shirt, otherwise known as the "Bella color." Her shirt fell onto the piano and I lifted her up to go back to my old room. Once we were in there I took off the white sheet and we fell onto the gold comforter.

About halfway through the night we got up to go home. First we wanted to stop by the cottage. We got dressed and started walking hand-in-hand towards the cottage. Bella had her head on my shoulder and she whispered, "I wish we had more time here. There are so many places I want to revisit."

"Then I will make it a goal to get a week away from home and we can spend it here."

"Now though? While Ness is pregnant," she asked.

"Not now," I reassured her. "Once the baby is a few months old or something."

She leaned up and kissed my jaw. "Thank you," she whispered.

We had arrived at the cottage and I opened the front door with a key that was hid in the gutter. We walked in and you could tell no one had been in there for a while. Bella and I walked towards Nessie's room and opened the door. In the corner of the room was a rather large toddler bed and against the side wall was her old crib that we couldn't bare to get rid of.

Bella walked over to the crib and laid her head on the metal. I was frozen for a couple of seconds in my own memories but the sound of Bella dry sobbing brought me back to reality. I walked up behind her and pulled her into my arms as she spun around putting her head on my chest. "Did you see her," she whispered, pained. "She was hurting. She was in pain, and there was NOTHING we could do about it. There was no way to help her. What if something serious did happen to Jacob? Ness would be a rec!"

"I know, I know," I said smoothing down her hair. "Come on lets go," I said pulling her onto my back and then we started to leave.

We arrived back at the house thirty minutes before we had to leave. Renesmee was still fast asleep and because of the medication Carlisle had gave her it was going to take a while to wake her up. "I'll go," Bella said going up the stairs gracefully. I followed her up but went to my room and went to the shower.

Esme had made some special water system, so our house had extra hot water so wee could actually feel some heat. It was close to the temperature of fire at it's highest and we always had it cranked up all the way, except for Ness. I stood there for I don't know how long until I felt Bella's arms snake around me from behind. She pressed her forehead into my back and sighed. "We have nine minutes and twenty-eight seconds to get ready," she murmured.

I pushed off of the shower wall and pulled Bella into the circle of my arms, "Do you think she will be happy today," I asked.

"Today yes, tomorrow no," she sighed.

"Come on," I whispered taking her hand and stepping out of the shower.

I quickly ran my fingers through her hair drying it, and then we went to our huge closet. I shouldn't have been surprised to see that Alice had left out things for Bella and I to wear. Alice trusted Nessie to dress herself most of the time unless it was some special occasion but she knew I would let Bella wear whatever she wanted. I didn't like to tell her no and she was always beautiful. It didn't matter what she was wearing to me, but when she wore that blue, "Bella" color it was great.

I had a white knit, long-sleeve shirt to wear with dark jeans and black tennis shoes. Bella had a a "Bella" color blue tank top made of silk that was tight right under her bust and loose under flowed out. It fell a few inches past her hips. Alice had paired it with super tight black skinny jeans, a leather mid-cut jacket, and black ankle boots. She looked absolutely stunning. Bella always does of course. "Come on," she said walking over to me and taking my hand. We walked down stairs and waited for Renesmee to come down.

She came bounding down the stairs and she walked right past us heading for the Volvo. She was ready to go. We got up from our place on the couch and followed her to my car. We got in wordlessly and Bella reached back to take her hand. Bella looked at me with sadness in her eyes. I drove as quickly as the Volvo would allow me.

We got to the airport in record time and all Renesmee was thinking about was staying calm. She waited for me to come and open the door for her and then walked at a nice human pace. "It is ten minutes till his plane lands," I said when we got to the chairs were we needed to wait. Ness took a deep breath and sat back in her chair and closed her eyes.

Her mind kind of went blank as she waited. When Jake's flight landed I whispered, "His flight just landed," to her. She got up and walked over to where other family members, friends, and co-workers had started to gather. She scooted her way to the front of everybody and waited.

I could hear Jacob, his thought were still so LOUD. I didn't mind as much as I used to. Especially not now. He was absolutely insane with worry. He wanted to see her to know she was okay. He wanted to have her in his arms to protect her. I knew that at one point I had hated Jacob Black but he was the only one I would ever be able to trust with my daughter.

Renesmee was standing there waiting and counting the seconds. She counted to 283 and then Jacob rounded the corner. I was holding Bella around her waist and her head was resting on my chest as we waited and watched the scene unfold in front of us.

Ness saw Jacob before he saw her. She waited for his eyes to find hers and when they did I could feel the joy that came from both of them through there thoughts. "Jacob," she whispered and she started running towards him. She made one of the alarms go off and I was afraid I was going to have to take care of that but one of the guards saw that she was running towards a soldier and thought, "_How sweet. I can't get her in any trouble with her loved one just coming home_," before turning off the alarm.

When Ness got closer to Jacob she jumped into his arms and he caught her easily. Jacob closed his eyes and took her in. The words he thought were flawless and something that I thought myself many years ago. He thought, "_I'm home_." Nessie was breathing hard and starting to cry with relief. "Don't let go," she whispered and Jacob brought her in even closer and his arms got tighter around her. He kissed her hair and he thought, "_She's perfect_," Then he whispered to her, "I love you." The words were filled with raw emotion and it took him a second to open his eyes. When he did he saw Bella and I standing there waiting for them and he started to walk again and he didn't put Renesmee down.

Bella and I walked in front with Jake following and Nessie in his arms. Nothing, not even Emmett pulling with all his power, could lessen the grip they had on each other. When we were in the car Ness laid her head in his lap and just looked up at Jacob. They were both looking at each other with pure love in there eyes and they were both deep in thought.

Renesmee was thinking of how happy she was to have him back and how close she was to loosing him. She knew that the next time they had to part it would be harder and she was glad I could hear her and help her through it. It felt good to know I was loved and needed by my daughter but maybe not in this way. Jacob simply didn't want to let go. He wanted her in his arms forever, safe. He trusted us of course, but it was like when I left Bella, things still could have happened to her, things did, and I wasn't the one there to protect her, which is what I should have been doing.

When we got home everyone was excited to see him. Renesmee wanted to talk, because she was now over the shock of seeing him again, but she was going to be the "grown-up," and those were her thoughts. I was proud of her there is no way I would have been able to do that unless I absolutely had to. I would have wanted my time to myself with Bella first. When Emmett asked what it had been like Ness thought, "_I never want to know,_" and Jacob thought, "_She doesn't _need _to know that_." Jacob looked at her and she nodded in encouragement.

They sat down and Renesmee had Jacob cover her ears. She leaned back and closed her eyes. I watched as she moved her hands to every place she could touch, just taking it in. Being in his arms again was something she never wanted to change so she was taking in every minute of it. I listened as Jacob talked about saving a little boys life and how he was always hungry and we all kind of laughed at that. Because of course Jacob was always hungry. Around three Jacob was _really _just wanting to talk to Nessie, to be alone with her.

So they left to went on a walk together. I started talking with the rest of my family about Ness and Jake and then we all stopped dead in our tracks as we heard a real, joy-filled laugh come from Renesmee. Bella looked like she was about to cry. The last time I had hear her laugh was on the car ride back from leaving Jake and those weren't her real laughs. They were little chuckles and sometimes I was lucky enough to get a giggle and it was only because it was fresh after leaving. My heart swelled at the sound of her laugh and I listened to there thought's. Jake was thinking, "_It has been too long since __I've heard her laugh. She is absolutely perfect,_" and the his eyes looked at her stomach and he smiled like a blind man seeing the sun. "_Perfect_," he thought. Renesmee was excited and happy and she was hoping that we had hear her laugh. She didn't want us to worry anymore and she wanted us to know that she could still be herself.

It was about three A.M. When I went to get Jacob. I was the one who was going to take him to the airport. I went to their little "mini" house and knocked on their bedroom door. There was no answer so I cracked the door open.

Renesmee was laying there bare backed with her head on Jacob's bare chest. One arm went over his stomach and one of Jacob's was wound closely around her, keeping her close. The sheet came up to their hips so I didn't _really _see anything I didn't need to. I watch Renesmee sleep sometimes and I haven't seen her face so peaceful, serene, and calm in a very long time.

I didn't want to take Jacob away from her. I didn't want to see her face in the morning when he was gone and she was waking up alone again. I walked over and touched Jacob's shoulder and his eyes flew open. "It's time," he asked and I nodded my head then I added, "Do me a favor and put some form of clothing on her. I'm going to need to be with her in the morning and I'd rather her not be naked. He nodded and went to slide out of the bed and in her sleep Ness started clinging on to him and she was mumbling in coherently. "Shh," he murmured smoothing her hair. He kissed her forehead and then slowly started to slide out and I left and shut the door.

Renesmee was going to be miserable again. It was painful for me to see my daughter's pain. She hadn't asked for this and yet she was stuck with the life of an army wife. I heard Jacob's thoughts finishing up and then I listen a little more. I watched as he kissed her forehead and then his eyes closed. I could feel his resistance to leave. He wanted to stay with her but he didn't have a choice in the matter.

He came out of his room and shut the door behind him. He went straight outside and sat in the passenger side of the Volvo. I got in and then he sighed and said, "It'll be bad wont it."

"Yeah, it will be," I said knowing exactly what he was talking about.

"That's what I was afraid of," he said resting his head on the headrest. "Should I have stayed there and not come back," he asked.

"No," I said bluntly, "I haven't seen her so happy and peaceful in months. You made her laugh and smile and we can't really do that. I know it was harder for you to leave each other again but that just means the next time you see each other you will be even happier."

"I guess," he said. "It's just to hard to leave her. It hurts to be away from her and I don't want her to wake up in pain."

"She would have been waking up in pain anyway," I told him sadly.

He bent down and picked up an envelop. "This is something I made with some buddies over there. It may help her," he said handing it over.

"Alright," I said taking the envelop.

"Promise me you will keep her safe," he whispered.

"You know I will," I said sternly.

I was at home now. Well actually I was in Nessie and Jake's home near ours. Renesmee really wanted to go home to her old home but not alone and when she was pregnant. So she stayed in her old room in the main house. She didn't like staying in her "mini" home alone. Renesmee stretched her arms out and was thinking, "_Where's Jacob_?" Then she remembered he was gone and she started to cry into her hands.

I got up and wrapped my arms around her. I had Jake's DVD in hand so I handed to her and said, "Jake left this for you." I started to stand up and she grabbed my arm, "Don't leave," she said and I heard her think, "_I need you_." I enveloped her in my arms as she cried. After about fifteen minutes of crying she was ready to put in the DVD.

She put it in and then waited with me to see what was on it. When she saw Jacob's face she began to cry again, but just a few tears. "Hey honey," he said smiling into the camera, "I just thought I'd share a few things with you and I thought I would tell you that I love you and I'm thinking about you every second of everyday. Stay strong and I'll be home soon." Renesmee looked on waiting to see more. Lonestar's "I'm Already There" began to play and there was a little slide show during it.

He called her on the phone

_From a lonely cold hotel room  
Just to hear her say I love you one more time  
But when he heard the sound  
Of the kids laughing in the background  
He had to wipe away a tear from his eye  
A little voice came on the phone  
Said "Daddy when you coming home"  
He said the first thing that came to his mind_

_I'm already there  
Take a look around  
I'm the sunshine in your hair  
I'm the shadow on the ground  
I'm the whisper in the wind  
I'm your imaginary friend  
And I know I'm in your prayers  
Oh I'm already there_

_She got back on the phone  
Said I really miss you darling  
Don't worry about the kids they'll be alright  
Wish I was in your arms  
Lying right there beside you  
But I know that I'll be in your dreams tonight  
And I'll gently kiss your lips  
Touch you with my fingertips  
So turn out the light and close your eyes_

_I'm already there  
Don't make a sound  
I'm the beat in your heart  
I'm the moonlight shining down  
I'm the whisper in the wind  
And I'll be there until the end  
Can you feel the love that we share  
Oh I'm already there_

_We may be a thousand miles apart  
But I'll be with you wherever you are_

_I'm already there  
Take a look around  
I'm the sunshine in your hair  
I'm the shadow on the ground  
I'm the whisper in the wind  
And I'll be there until the end  
Can you feel the love that we share  
Oh I'm already there  
Oh I'm already  
There_

Renesmee was crying her eyes out by the time the video was over. She was amazed at the time and effort Jacob had put into it. She was in awe and the last picture of the two of them took her breath away. Then Jacob came back on to say more. "I hoped you liked that. I wanted you to know I'm doing alright considering. Just stay safe I'm sure I don;t have to worry about that with ole Edward around though," he chuckled. "I love you and I know it's going to be hard, but I'll be back soon. Then we will have a beautiful baby girl or boy we can raise together. I love you Renesmee," he said and then the video cut off. Renesmee let her head rest on my shoulder and thought, "_He's right. This is going to be hard._"

_**A/N: I have no idea why but this chapter was a lot harder to right then the other ones. It was harder for me to get into the mindset of Edward, almost painful at times and I have no idea why... I hope I did well and the only way I can possibly know how you felt is if you review! I'm sorry it took forever but like I said this was a hard one to write! I'm pretty sure you will all love the next chapter though! I know how the story will end and no I wont give any hints. I'll tell you this much there will be 1 or 2 more twists depending on how you look at it and there will be a sequel! R&R and tell your friends:) I Love you guys (gals)! P.S. Just so you know it may be a week or two before I start on my next chapter or by the earliest Thursday but you wont get it for a while. It is fall break next week and I'm going to Fl. and this wont be at the top of my to-do list. **_


	20. Chapter 20 Homecoming Plus Some

**Chapter 20: Homecoming plus some...**

**Nessie's POV**

It took me a while to get back to normal, well the normal I was with Jake away. Okay a while may be an understatement it took me a month to be able to have conversation that lasted longer than five minutes with anyone other than my dad. I got a lot better a few days ago when my friends came up to visit me.

School ended May 27 and they where up here the next day. They can actually get me to laugh a little. I don't think they would even be getting that much if it wasn't for the fact that when they came Jake was going to be coming home in four days. They where going to stay until the second of June, just to keep me distracted because Jacob was coming home around eight P.M. On the first, and then coming over later in the summer to see the baby, except for Malyssa. Seth had bought a home down the road from us and they are going to stay there during the summers and live in there house in Kentucky during the school year.

I still didn't know if it was a boy or girl. I wanted it to be a surprise plus I knew my family could have the nursery, a room they had built above mine and Jacob's at our "mini house," ready in a day or less once I asked them too. I had picked out boy furniture and girl furniture, along with the bedspreads, wall color, and everything else. Everything we would need for both genders had already been bought so we just had to wait until I delivered, which could be any day now.

Today I was going out shopping with Malyssa and my friends from college to try and keep my mind busy because Jacob was coming home tonight! Malyssa and my college friends;.Jayden, Emmalia, Nev, Bailey, and Susan; all got along very well together like I knew they would. I was excited to have my four closest friend here from school but I hadn't really been able to get to know the others.

Now I'm being dragged to the mall. If I didn't know I had better things awaiting me it wouldn't be that bad. I closed my eyes and thought of being in Jacob's arms again. I heard my door open and then all of a sudden Alice was jumping on my bed. "We're going shopping, we're going shopping," she sang continuing to jump.

I found a pillow and threw it at her. "Alice," I complained, "My feet are going to be killing me by the time I go to the airport," I said as she bounced down onto her butt.

"Oh don't me such a pansy," she said after shrugging her shoulders.

"Alice, I know for a fact you have never been pregnant so stop it with the attitude, okay. I'm trying to pationtly await the arrival of my husband and it isn't the easiest thing in the world," I complained.

"Point taken but you are still coming."

"Ugh," I groaned falling back onto the mattress. "Why me?"

"Pah-lease stop whining! It is annoying," she said standing up. "Your friends are almost ready so get moving girl."

My mouth was hanging wide open. Alice, Alice just laced me, me annoying! I couldn't believe it and was in a little bit of shock. This coming from the girl who relentlessly plans parties and pretty much won't stop until she has her way. And if she doesn't get her way you would never hear the end of it! I could hear my dad laughing from downstairs so I mentally thought, "_It's true! It took me a whole freaking month to get her to not through me a baby shower! She could obviously see that I wasn't in the party mood and she thought the party planning would make me happier? She is nuts dad! I swear to God, nuts._"

My dad continued to laugh from downstairs and I figured it was time to get ready. Alice had gone crazy with the Heidi Klum fashion line and I had every article there was. Today I was going to wear a black short-sleeve, deep v-neck knot front maternity shirt with secret fit belly super stretch skinny jeans. I slipped on some TOMS because ever since I entered the third trimester my feet have been killing me. I did my bangs in a poof at the top of my head and pulled the rest up in a ponytail. My wedding ring as always was in place and I put on a silver cuff bracelet and a silver drop necklace that tied in a knot.

"Come on Ness," I could hear Alice yell from downstairs.

"Coming," I sighed. Why did she have to be so pushy? And I was the one who was annoying, please!

I walked down the stairs gracefully and my dad came over to whisper to me, "We'll see you later at the airport, alright?"

"Okay," I said kissing his cheek and turning towards an eager Alice waiting at the door.

"Wait," my dad said grabbing my arm. "They are going to the hotel after right? They do have their own car except for Malyssa right?"

"Yes dad," I whispered rolling my eyes.

"Okay then. Have fun," he said smiling.

"Yeah right," I laughed.

I ran out to the car that Alice and Malyssa were waiting for me in. The rest were all riding in a separate car. "You took for ever," Alice complained.

"Alice," I said putting my head on headrest and shutting my eyes. "Would you please just shut up!"

"Fine," she grumbled. Even though she had surrendered I knew it was going to be a long day!

It was now seven-o-clock and Jacob would be home at seven! We were leaving the mall and then I was going out to eat with Lyss and Alice and then Mom and Dad would meet me and take me to the airport while Alice and Malyssa went home.

We were just going to keep it simple and go to Olive Garden. It was the nicest thing close to the airport so that's where we wound up. I was singing at the top of my lungs, "_Shot to the heart and your to late. You give love a bad name_." We pulled up and I was laughing because singing always made me a little happier. I out one leg out of the car and was in the process of standing up when I sat right back down.

"Ness come on," Alice said winning for the hundredth time today. What part of pregnant did she not get?

"I don't think so," I said sitting back.

"What do you mean, come on."

"Alice," I said calmly putting my head on the headrest. "Get in the car."

"Why should I?" Then she gasped as I'm sure she knew what I was about to say.

"Come on Malyssa we are going home," Alice told Malyssa.

"Why? Whats wrong?"

"Her water just broke," Alice said getting in and shutting her door with Lyss right behind her.

**Jacob's POV**

I was so ready to see Ness that it wasn't even funny. I had been missing her like crazy. I couldn't wait for her to be in my arms again where she would stay forever. I had been sent a couple of pictures of her and I was sure that by this point she would be ready to pop. I hadn't really seen her pregnant.

When I saw her she only had a little bump. The little bump of our baby! I just couldn't get over the fact that soon I was going to be a dad. I hadn't really had much time to ponder it. "Over there" the main focus was on staying safe to get back to Ness and the baby and just Nessie in general.

Even though I thought of the baby I didn't think of myself as a father but it was kind of hitting me. I had about a week to prepare to be a father and I wasn't sure if a week was enough time. Usually you have months and technically I had but I hadn't been there to see Ness's bump getting bigger. A week. I couldn't believe it.

**Nessie's POV**

"What about Jacob," I said as dad carried me up to Carlisle's office turned into a hospital room.

"Someone will go get him," dad said soothingly.

"But I want to see him and he has to be here dad! He can't miss this," I said starting to get hysterical.

"Shh sweetie," both my parents said smoothing my hair and rubbing my arm trying to comfort me.

"How do you know?"

"We don't. Alice can't see," my mom said looking down but then added. "There is no way he would miss it for the world."

"What if he doesn't have a choice?"

"Just sit down and try to relax honey," Mom crooned.

I did as I was told and laid back. I didn't want Jake to miss this. He had to see the birth of his child. He just had to. "Ugh, oww," I said laying my head back and closing my eyes.

"Contraction," Mom asked.

"Yeah," I panted.

"Honey did you decided if you wanted the tub or to just stay here."

"Here," I said not wanting to have to get up and relocate. When I was little I always loved watching the birthing shows. I was always amazed to see that people would give birth in bath tubs and recently I had thought about doing that myself but not right now. While I was already here in the bed.

"Hey mom or anyone," I asked since everyone was now in the room, which I had to say was a little uncomfortable. "Can someone get someone or can someone go themselves to get Jake."

"We will," Uncle Jasper and Emmett said in unison. It was kind of funny they where both just itching to get out of there and I was glad to have them out of there. I really didn't want my uncles seeing my crotch with a little head sticking out.

"Can everyone please leave the room," dad said and everyone left.

"Thanks dad but you didn't have to do that," I said blushing a little.

"It is just because Carlisle has to see how many centimeters you are. I'll make sure they are standing by the sides of the bed though and you can put a cover over your legs if you want."

"'Kay."

"Are you ready," Carlisle asked putting on gloves.

"Not even a little bit but go ahead."

**Jacob's POV**

Everyone started clapping when the tires of the plane hit the ground. I waited as patiently as possible for the doors to open. When I made my way into the crowds of people I used my height to look for Ness. Where the hell was she? I couldn't even hear her heart and then I heard a dog whistle.

"Ugh," I grumbled looking around and that's when I saw Emmett with a serious but smirking face. Jasper was next to him urging me forward.

I started running over to them. "Where's Ness," I asked impatiently.

"Come on we have to go," Jasper said starting to walk.

"Why? Where is Nessie," I asked starting to get a little worried.

"She is in labor," he said and with that I started running.

**Nessie's POV**

"Ness you are seven centimeters you are going to be ready to push soon," Carlisle said. This was the second time he had checked. I had went from four to seven in about ten minutes.

"Jake's not here though," I mumbled.

"He still has time to make it though," mom said soothingly.

"Ahhh," I said tilting my head back as another contraction came.

**Jacob's POV**

"Can you go any faster," I complained to Jasper.

"I'm going as fast as I can. Besides we are all most there."

"I can't miss this. You have to go faster."

"We are almost there."

"Hurry," I said.

**Nessie's POV**

"Renesmee it's time to push, honey," dad said rubbing my shoulder.

"Dad, I can't."

"Yes you can."

Sometimes my dad was so dumb. I knew I could push and I knew I need to push. I could feel the pressure to push. It came natural and really I knew what I needed to do, but I was just going to go through some more pain.

"They are turning onto the driveway as we speak," dad said and that is when I heard the car pull up.

"Alright. Everyone get ready then, I guess."

**Jacob's POV**

Jasper had just slowed the car and I jumped out and started running towards Carlisle's office.

"Ness next contraction you start pushing alright. No choice," Carlisle said.

"But," I heard Nessie's protest and me feet quickened.

"He is coming up the stairs now," Edward said.

I got to the door and opened it taking in everything before me. The bed was against the wall opposite to the door. Edward was on the other side of the bed holding Ness's hand and Bella and Esme were doing that thing where you hold the foot and the leg and pull it back or whatever. Alice had a video camera and Rose had a regular camera strapped to her wrist and they were standing on the same side as Edward.

"Jacob," Nessie whispered and I rushed over to her and cupped her beautiful faces in my hands and kissed her quickly. She put her hands over mine and said, "You're here," with a little smile.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world," I said kissing her forehead.

"One's coming," Alice said and Ness whispered, "Grab my hand," so I did what I was told.

"Yeah," Ness groaned.

"Push Ness," Carlisle told her and she started to push and Carlisle counted, "One, two three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. Good rest for a second... Ready push again one, two three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. Alright I see the head. Just one more really big push okay. Ready. Push, push, push, push, push," he chanted and then Ness let her head fall back and she caught her breath.

That's when a heard a little cry. The cry of my little baby. I leaned down and kissed Renesmee with tears coming into my eyes but I held them off. "I love you Renesmee," I whispered.

"Love you too," she said smiling.

"Jacob do you want to cut the cord," Carlisle asked.

"Um, sure," I said walking over to him and Ness said, "Boy or girl?"

I walked over and saw the most beautiful baby boy I had ever seen. I had the most perfect son ever. "We have a son," I said holding him up and then cutting the umbilical cord.

"Carlisle," Ness panted. "Why does it feel like I'm having another contraction?"

"Could be the placenta or," Carlisle paused and started checking something. I walked back over to Nessie and let her hold our little baby boy. "There's another one," he said turning to Ness and I.

"What," Renesmee yelled her eyes poping out of her head. "How?"

"Just get ready to push again," Carlisle said.

Rosalie walked over and took my son in her arms. Thing was I trusted and got along with blondie now and I would mess with her sometimes because it was fun.

"Next contraction," Carlisle said looking up and she nodded and I kissed her hand. Bella and Esme where a little emotional and they looked like they where crying with no tears like they always did and Edward's eyes where closed and I assumed he was taking it all in.

"Here it comes," Alice said.

"Ness-" Carlisle began but she cut him, "I know."

This time Renesmee only did two hard pushes and another little baby was crying. In about ten minutes time I had become a father of two. "Jacob," Carlisle started. "Coming," I told him.

I walked over expecting another girl but I discovered I had a little baby girl. I looked up and said, "It's a girl."

Edward looked up and smiled at me. "Know you will know what it was like for me." Truth was I was already thinking about my little baby girl growing up and going to be with another. I didn't want that to happen. At all. I looked at Edward and his smile was bigger and he winked at me. _"Look I'm married dude, with two kids,"_ I thought to him and he just smirked and rolled his eyes.

The next thirty minutes where filled with pictures and hugs and congratulations. Renesmee was tired and she fell asleep in my arms. Like she would forever but sometime our son and daughter may be sleeping in between us.

**Nessie's POV**

I woke up to the sound of Jacob snoring next to me and I reached up to kiss his cheek. I hadn't woken up next to him since the day he left and I felt like after months of wondering in the desret I was finally home.

"Your up," Jake smiled down at me.

"Mh'hm," I murmured running my finger tips along him. "Did you bring me down here seeing as how I remembered falling asleep in Carlisle's office."

"Yeah, I thought this would be a nicer place for you to wake up. The babies are with everyone else."

"That's what I figured," I said rolling my eyes. After all the months of being away being together still felt like the most natural thing in the world.

"They're perfect," he said looking up at the ceiling.

"Sure are," I said thinking of my beautiful son and daughter. I still hadn't got my head wrapped around it. Jake and I had two children together and we never even thought we would have one. It didn't even seem like I was just pregnant twelve hours ago. My stomach was flat and well, "Jacob?"

"Yes sweetie," he said pressing his lips to my forehead.

"Do I have to wait the normal six weeks. I feel like my old self."

"Carlisle said it was the babies who were growing like normal babies. That your body just adapted to them growing but after the vampire in you took over. He said it seemed like more kids weren't really a possibility but if we wanted we could give it a shot."

"So I'm fine to greet you properly then," I said looking up with a wicked smile on my faces.

"You can greet me in whatever way will please you," he said with a little smirk on his face.

I quickly sat up and straddled his hips leaning down to kiss him. He but his muscular hands on my now tiny waist and pushed me over onto my back with him rolling along with me. I was only in one of his t-shirts and panies and my shirt was off in record time.

He pressed his body down against mine and kissed me. Then his hands scooped under me and he lifted me up. We were kind of sitting on the bed. He was sitting on his knees and my legs where wrapped around him with my hands in his hair.

His arms pressed against my back which pressed me into him. He trailed one hand up my spine and to my now tangled hair. Then he laid me back on my back and he started running his lips all over me. My head, neck, collarbone, shoulders, chest, in between my breast, down my curves, he got rid of my panies and kissed my hips as his hands ran up and down my legs. He worked his way back up my stomach and was back to my face. "I," kiss on the cheek. "Missed," kiss on the other cheek. "Every," on my forehead. "Inch," neck. "Of," nose. "My," chin. "Wife," he said going and tilting my head up so he could kiss me better.

The next time I woke up the sun was shinning and I was still wrapped in Jacob's arms. He was up, smiling down at me. "Lat night was," he started but I interrupted him with a kiss. All I will say is that we had missed each other a lot and we still had a lot of lost time to make up for.

"I love you, but I want to go see our children. That we made. Doing what we did," I said smiling looking up at her.

"Anything you want."

We both got up and began to get dressed. I just put on a Juicy running outfit and I was ready to be on my way. Jacob put on some sweats and t-shirt and he walked over and took my hand. We walked outside and started towards the house hand in hand.

"We have to pick names," he said.

"What do you like," I asked him.

"No way. You pick. First off you where they one who did all the work in the end. Plus I'll probably pick some crazy name."

"True," I said laughing. "So the only combination of Billy and Edward are like. Billward, Edy, and um well that's all I got," I said laughing.

"My son will never be named that," Jacob said shaking his head and I laughed. "I like Caden. Caden Allen."

"When did you come up with that name?"

"While you were gone. I just really liked it."

"Caden. Allen. Black. I like it. Let me guess you already have a girl name?"

I just nodded.

"And that would be," he said looking down at me.

"Sarah Bella. I think it sounds kind of Italian but it works," I shrugged my shoulders.

Jake stopped me. "You are naming her after my mom."

"Of course I am," I said looking into his eyes.

"Thank you," he whispered and then slung his arm around me kissing my forehead as I wrapped mine around him.

We got to the main house and everyone greeted us warmly. I saw Caden first and walked over to him. "How's my little man doing," I cooed and Jacob went to get Sarah.

"How's my baby girl," he said picking her up and walking over to me.

"Have you two picked names yet," Esme asked sitting down next to me.

"Yes," I said. "This is Caden Allen Black."

"And this," Jake said, "Is Sarah Bella."

"Bella," mom said smiling.

"Yeah it adds a nice ring to it," I said smiling at her.

"For the record," Jacob said laying back placing on arm around me and keeping Sarah in his other. "I was totally against it," he laughed.

"Jacob Black if you weren't holding that baby girl," my mom started but Jacob interrupted her.

"Oh please you wouldn't do anything Bells," he smirked.

"Oh just shut up Jake," my mom said and I laughed.

Alice came bounding down the stairs, "Come on Esme we have to go work on Caden and Sarah's ro-om."

Esme got up to leave and I sat back ready to enjoy a day filled with family. A perfect, complete family.

**_A/n: Sorry it took so long! I had break in Florida but my 5 page research paper and Script for my theatre class are more important but I'd rather be writing this! Hop you enjoyed! R&R plus subscription;)_**


	21. Chapter 21 Lord Please Let thisbea Dream

**Chapter 21. Lord Please Let This Be A Dream- Amen.**

_**A/N: Thank you guys for your amazing reviews and support! I have the best reviewers out there! Before you read this send me a message guessing about the story, or ask me about anything you want it could be my views on politics for all I care. Also this chapter you are about to read changes EVERYTHING! I know that is a huge spoiler but it adds to the suspense! I'm sorry for how long it takes me to update! I'm just a VERY busy and sleep-deprived girl! Oh well, one more thing before I actually let you read, when you think it's the end it wont be! There will be one more chapter! I also have a kind of small squeal made up in my mind! I probably won't write it until this summer when I have more time (A.K.A. When I can stay up later!) I'm going to write other stuff that isn't about mythical beings but is real, I may even put part of my script for theatre on here or turn it into a "book." But I promise the squeal will be better if I step away from Jake and Nessie and focus on something else, (along with trying to sort my love life...) So add a author subscription so you can at least read the squeal please! Here you go:**_

My life could not get any better! After having Caden and Sarah it felt like nothing could ever go wrong. We stayed in Forks for about six months and then Jake and I went back home to Tennessee. Jake was an amazing father! He loved both of our children so much. He could always make them laugh and smile and feel safe.

I loved motherhood and I was living my dream. I could remember everything from both of there lives. Caden's first laugh and smile, his first steps, his first tooth, his first cut and bruise and it was the same for Sarah Bella. Our family came to visit all the time and we would also go to see them along with going to La Push. My life is the way it is supposed to be.

I still have to take everything in every now and then. Caden and Sarah just finished their kindergarten year at West Cheatham Elemntary School. They had the greatest teacher Mrs. Lockert. Caden and Sarah are really bright and we are considering letting them skip first grade and that is everyone's suggestion. Sarah decided she wanted to take gymnastics, learn how to cheer, and take dance lessons; while Caden has taken up soccer. For their age they are doing absolutely wonderful and I don't think life could get any better!

The kids turned six yesterday and they had a big party with all their friends from school. All of the Cullens had come down for the week leading up to the twins birthday. It was great when the whole family was here. When they left after the party I was so worn out. It had been a crazy week with Alice planning the party (You didn't think that wouldn't be her did you? ;) and thinks settled down today. We slept in and went to the evening church service.

"'Kay kids time for bed," I yelled into the living room where the kids were playing Sorry Sliders with Jacob.

"Mom," the both whined.

"If you go right now," Jacob whispered, "Mommy and Daddy will read you a story in our room."

I laughed as the kids took off to their room. Jake came over and wrapped his arms around me then whispered, "and after they've fallen asleep and we put them in their rooms we can..."

"Mommy," Jacob was interrupted by Sarah yelling for me. "I need help."

"Coming sweetie," I said smiling. Then I kissed Jacob and started towards her room.

We had just redone both Sarah and Caden's rooms. Sarah wanted hers pink and to be like a princess

room. Esme and Alice came down to do them. Sarah had a bed bigger than any six year old needed. It had a giant white canopy that fell to the floor. She had a dance bar in her room along with some tumbling mats that where kept in the corner. One wall had a bunch of little mirrors randomly placed on it. She had a large dresser and vanity along with a large closet full of clothes thanks to Alice. I peeked in her closet and saw her with her tulle dress half-way over her head and she was struggling to get it all the way off. When I started laughing her one eye she could see with turned to me and she whined, "Mommy it's not funny."

I shook my head. "It is a little funny."

"Can't you just help me."

"Come 'er," I said as she ran over to me. I helped her out of her dress and then took of her boots. I had no idea where she had gotten her dark blonde hair and blue eyes while Caden had brown hair and green eyes.

"Momma can you help me with my boots too."

"Of course I can. What pajamas do you want to wear," I asked her knowing she would want to pick.

"Um... My pink panda ones!"

"Well go get them," I said ruffling her hair.

"Mo-om, don't mess up my hair."

"Sorry," I said smiling.

Once I helped her into her pj's I told her to go brush her teeth and hair and to go to my room while I went to check on Caden. I walked over to Caden's room and peeked in. He was already out of his Nordstorm dress shirt and shoes and his jeans. He had on his pajamas and a little belt with a fake gun and cowboy hat. Jacob also had a belt and gun with a hat. They where having a show down and I couldn't help but smile. Then Caden pulled out his gun and "shot" Jacob. Jacob put on a show before falling over onto the bed. Caden ran over and jumped on top of him yelling "I won, I won, I won."

I left smiling knowing Jacob would bring Caden up in a minute. I just couldn't imagine a better life than this. I loved my children and their personalities. I loved everything about being a mom and watching my kids grow. Its just been happening so fast though but everyone says it does. I love hearing, "Momma you look so pretty," and all the little things they say. I walked into my bedroom and took my Christian Louboutin marine ankle boots and put them next to my Steve Madden bag. I went to look at the books we had on the bookshelf and there wasn't anything I wanted to read to them tonight.

I could hear Sarah coming but kept stayed where I was. She ran into the room and I turned holding my arms open for her to jump into them. She did and I spun her around and listened to her peals of laughter, hardly aware that for some reason it was hard to lift her. "So what does the princess want to read tonight," I asked.

"Mom," she sighed. "I'm only a princess when I wear my crown."

"Oh. Okay. So what does Sarah want to read?"

"Can we watch a movie instead? I don't want to listen tonight."

"Well what did you have in mind?"

"Steel Magnolias," she said smiling and looking hopeful. Mom had me watch that movie when I was younger and after seeing it it became one of my favorites. One day when everyone was visiting all the girls where watching it in the living room and Sarah wondered in, thus starting her love for the movie.

"You want to watch it again," I asked and she looked up nodding and smiling.

"Okay well we have to hurry and put it in. Because if we don't daddy and Caden well never let us watch," I whispered to her. I pulled down the screen and got out the projector. It was kind of like a portable home theatre. When Jacob and Caden came in they laid down on the bed happy to be watching a movie and then groaned when they saw what movie it was.

"Oh be quiet. You know it is a good movie. Caden, Sarah you know what words not to say right," I asked.

"Yes momma," the said in unison.

I snuggled into Jacob's arms. With my head on his chest and Sarah in my arms and Caden in Jacob's I felt at home. For the very first time though I didn't make it to Shelby's , "I would rather have thirty minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special," line. Jacob woke me up when the kids were both asleep and the movie was almost over. "We have to put the kids in bed," he whispered kissing me on the cheek.

"Can't you carry them both," I asked with a smirk.

"Fine but as soon as I get back you'll owe me," now he was the one smirking.

"Fine," I smiled. When he was gone with Caden and Sarah I took off my skirt and top. I took my hair down letting my curls hang free after being held up in an up-do all night. Jacob walked in and I walked right into his arms. I started unbuttoning his American Eagle shirt and kissing his chest. He unhooked my bra as my hands slid down his chest going for his zipper. We started walking towards the bed, kissing as we went. I got his jeans off and as we fell onto the bed his hand on my breast. Then Jake said stop.

"What did you just say," I said looking at him like he was crazy.

"I said stop," he said sitting up.

"Why," I asked sitting next to him.

"Come here," he whispered taking my hands. He lead me to the bathroom and turned the lights on. He grabbed my shoulders and turned me to the full length mirror. He walked me close to it then pointed to my breast.

"Ness," he whispered. "Do you see what I am seeing."

I brought my hand up and ran my fingers across the lump on my breast. "I... I think we should call Carlisle or dad and go home. Sooner the better."

I felt like I was in shock. This couldn't be what I thought it was, could it? I watched Jacob get his phone and dial a number then I just listened.

"Hey Edward, It's me Jacob."

"What's wrong? It's eleven o'clock on a Sunday down there."

"Well. We found a lump on Nessie's breast."

"Come home. I'll have Carlisle ready to check it out."

I watched Jacob hang up then he looked over at me. I didn't know what expression would be on my face. Jacob walked over and pulled me into his arms. "It's going to be okay," he whispered. "Everything will work out."

I pulled away from Jacob and looked him in the eye. "I usually hang on your every word. So how come this time it's so hard to believe you?"

"Hey it could be nothing. Now we need to get ready and go," he said. He was being everything I needed at this moment. He was being strong and pretty much care free, but I knew him too well. I knew it was all an act. He took my hand and we walked into our closet.

I put on some cotton shorts, a crop top, and sneakers. I grabbed a thin sweater to put on later when we where up in the cool weather. Jacob threw on some basketball shorts, a sweatshirt, and some Jordans. "I'll go get the kids and bring them to the car," I said opening the door.

"I'll do it," Jake said stepping in front of me. "Just pack some snacks and grab some movies. It's a long drive."

"Grab Sarah's black faux fur boots and get Caden's slippers. Don't put them in your truck we are taking my SUV it will give the kids more room when they wake up."

"You know you don't always have to take control," Jake said walking over and kissing my forehead.

I smiled at him. "But if I don't nothing would ever get done."

I turned around and headed for the kitchen. I grabbed a little cooler and started packing it with grapes and crackers and even some sweets along with drinks. Then I went into the living room to grab our giant thing of movies and I grabbed some favorites for me and Jake and some of the kids favorites. Jake was already in the car and I just had to stop and cry. It was the middle of the night and we were leaving to go and see if I had breast cancer.

Jake came in behind me and pulled me up from the ground. He held me in the cradle of his arms as he grabbed the movie case and walked into the kitchen. He through the cooler over his shoulder and we started towards the car. The kids where still fast asleep in the back. Jake got in and pulled out. Ten he took my hand. "Everything will be fine," he said. I looked over to him. His jaw had a hard set to it as he looked out the window. He glanced over to me and I nodded then fell asleep.

I woke up hearing the kids laughing at the movie they where watching and the sun out. I glanced over at Jake who was smiling. He pressed a button making the kid's d.v.d. Player turn off. "Heyyy," they complained in unison. "We are almost there," Jake said and Caden and Sarah sat up to look out the windows. Jake turned to me, "How are you feeling," he asked. "Fine," I said sitting up.

We pulled up to the house and my parents where waiting on the porch. Caden and Sarah got out of the car and ran towards them. Jake came over and opened the door for me helping me out. We walked up to my parents who were still playing with Caden and Sarah. Dad didn't look up neither of my parents did, "Carlisle is waiting for you in his office. Jake and I walked upstairs to Carlisle's office.

Once we where in there Carlisle performed a biopsy. As we waited for the results we talked to Carlisle.

"If I have it, it will be curable wont it," I asked.

"Well we don't know it we caught it in time."

"What do you mean," Jacob said rubbing my shoulder.

"Your vampire side could have made it less obvious for you to notice how long you've had it. There is a possibility it could have spread."

"If my vampire side was hiding it then how did my human side get it in the first place?"

"The same way anyone does. We never considered the possibility of you getting cancer. Another issue you face is if your vampire side speeding it up. That includes the chemo and spreading."

"Wow."

Then their was a knock on the door. Carlisle got up and placed his body so we couldn't see who it was but I could smell Alice's scent. Jacob pulled me closer to him keeping me in his protection. Carlisle walked back in and he didn't let us see his face. When he looked up he looked sad. I knew. "I have cancer," I whispered and he nodded. "I'll give you two your privacy," he said leaving the room.

Tears started streaming down my face but I didn't utter a sound. Jacob just pulled my had to his chest and rocked me back and forth, he didn't speak either. What could you say there was nothing to say. We sat there until I heard Caden and Sarah complaining about wanting to see us. We got up and I was still crying but seeing there faces would be what I needed.

We walked down stairs. "Momma," Sarah yelled running to me. I gave her a little smile and bent down to give her a hug. Caden ran over too saying, "Why where you upstairs all day?"

When they got to me they stopped. Sarah touched my cheek and said, "Mommy why are you crying?"

"It;s nothing sweetie."

"You sure you are okay," she said so sweetly that it broke my heart.

"Mommy just isn't feeling good, that's all," I told her brushing her hair behind her ears.

"Maybe you should lay down and I'll make you some soup," she said looking up at me with a small smile.

"I'd love that," I smiled.

I watched as Sarah asked Caden for his help and she took his hand and they started towards the kitchen where Esme was. Everyone was out of the living room and my parents came over. My dad just hugged me and didn't let me go for a long time. He started to sob and that didn't help my crying either. Jacob was trying to get my mom to calm down. He pulled her in to hug her and then he glanced over to me and dad. I watched as he closed his eyes as a few tears rolled down his cheek. When mom was ready to come over to me she just hugged me and told me how sorry she was and how much she loved me. They where acting as if there was no hope and that scared me. I was supposed to be immortal! This should not be happening.

Carlisle came down the steps with the same sad look. "We should start your treatment. I'm ready when you are." He went back upstairs and the kitchen door opened. I smiled when I saw Sarah and Caden walk out in doctor coats all the accessories. Esme followed with soup. "Is everyone sick now," Caden asked and Sarah started scolding me, "Mommy I thought I told you to go rest."

"Okay, okay I'm going," I said. "Give me a hug before I go to sleep."

Both my children ran towards me to give me a hug. I pulled them close and let out a little sob. "Night mommy I love you," Caden said at the same time Sarah said, "I love you mommy."

"I love both of you so much," I said and then I reluctantly let them go.

"Okay kids. Time for bed. We are going to sleep in your mom's old room," Esme said then she walked over to me and whispered. "I love you sweet Nessie," in my ear.

"I love you too grandma," I said holding her clothes not wanting to let her go.

Jake and I finally went upstairs to start my surgery and chemotherapy...

**Jacob's POV**

I was pacing back and forth outside of Carlisle's office. The person I cared for most in this life just had surgery and was under going chemo for the cancer that had spread. Carlisle said the effects of chemo will probably show quickly on her.

I felt like hitting something. If she... I couldn't... I don't know what I would do without her. I'd have to find some way to keep going for Sarah and Caden but I don't know how I would. "Jacob," Carlisle called and I dashed into the room where Ness was. "She's out for the night. You can carry her home if you want but can you come back later?"

"Sure," I said walking over to Renesmee's sleeping body and pulling her close to my chest. I walked down stairs and through the woods to our little house. I slipped her under the covers and kissed her forehead before I left to leave.

I headed back to the house. When I walked in everyone just looked sad. Esme was crying in Carlisle's arms who still looked sad. Bella and Edward where just holding each other. Alice had her head in Jasper's lap. She looked distressed and sad and poor Jasper was getting stuck feeling all this depression. Emmett was rubbing Rose's arm and they both looked just as tired and sad as the rest of them. They all looked up when I walked in.

"Jake," Bella was the first to speak. "How are you."

"Fine," I grumbled sitting on a step.

"Jake. Really. How are you," Bella said sitting up and looking at me.

"Crappy okay," I said sitting up getting angry. "This sucks! I feel alone and helpless. There is nothing I can do to help her. There is nothing I can do to lesson her pain damn it!"

"Jake," Bella said in a calming tone.

"Your not alone," Esme said trying to comfort me.

"And we don't know what's going to happen," Carlisle continued.

"I know we don't know what's going to happen! Why does Alice look so distraught? Huh? It's because she can't see! She either doesn't know what's going to happen or she dies! Neither of those options are options I want right now! I want to go back to yesterday when everything was fine! When we were a happy family! And you said I wasn't alone but it sure as hell feels like it," I finished my tantrum by leaving and slamming the door leaving everyone yelling my name for me to come back.

I ran back to the house. I wanted to hold Nessie in my arms. I wanted her to be safe and better. When I entered the room I bent over and stroked her hair. My heart broke when some strands fell out. Carlisle was right. This chemo did work fast.

I broke down crying. At the edge of the bed just holding her hand...

_**A/N: PLEASE DON'T HATE ME! I know you probably want to kill me right now but you know when a story forms itself well that is what happened. I really don't want to hear, "She is immortal she can't get cancer," etc. I feel like I've addressed that and technically I'm not Stephanie Meyer the wonderful creator of this story so I don't know the logistics of it all. So if it is not a review like the one I wrote I'd love to hear it! This was a VERY hard chapter for me to write! That's one of the reason's it took so long! Also I found a website that allows me to give you some visually aids for outfits! (Look for them on my profile)  
**_


	22. Chapter 22 If I Die Young

**Chapter 22. If I Die Young**

Thursday night I got a call from church. Everyone was wondering why The Black's weren't at church and the choir director was wondering why I wasn't at choir practice when I was supposed to sing a couple solos Sunday at church. Everyone had asked Malyssa, since her and Seth lived in Tennessee during the summer.

I told them I'd be there Sunday no matter what. I was trying to stay as happy, upbeat, and normal as I could for everyone else. I wasn't going to let myself become weak. It was just really tiring fighting it. Carlisle said I could go. I wasn't allowed to leave until Sunday morning and only early enough so I could stop by the house and then go to the evening church service.

We where about to leave. I had tole Sarah and Caden goodbye after spending the whole day yesterday, well when I wasn't sleeping, with them. Chemo had taken a lot out of me. I had already lost my hair and I had lost weight. I just never felt like eating because I was afraid of it making me even sicker. I smiled as much as I could and tried to laugh as much as I could even though I always felt like I was hurting.

I told everyone goodbye and they started to cry. I guess it was emotional but I was determined to smile and tell them everything would be okay. Jake has been wonderful. He is strong and puts on a good show for the kids. We just told them that mommy was sick and that was enough for them. I didn't know how many times I had told them that mommy loved them more than anything in the world this week. Jake and I got in the car and he turned on the radio. I figured I should sing and warm-up my voice I was keeping the songs I would be singing a secret. I put in a really old c.d. And to lighten the mood I started singing, "Ain't No Other Man," by Christiana Aguilera.

_Do your thang honey!_

I had feelings from the start,  
Couldn't stand to be apart.  
Something about you caught my eye,  
Something moved me deep inside!  
Don't know what you did boy but  
You had it and I've been hooked ever since.  
I told my mother, my brother, my sister and my friend  
I told the others, my lovers, from past and present tense.  
Every time i see you everything starts making sense.

Do your thang honey!

Ain't no other man, can stand up next to you  
Ain't no other man on the planet does what you do  
(what you do).  
You're the kinda guy, a girl finds in a blue moon.  
You got soul, you got class.  
You got style with your bad ass - oh yeah!  
Ain't no other man its true - alright -  
Ain't no other man but you.

Do your thang honey!

Never thought I'd be alright. No, no, no!  
Till you came and changed my life. Yeah, yeah, yeah!  
What was cloudy now is clear! Yeah, yeah!  
For the light that I needed.  
You got what I want boy, and I want it!  
So keep on givin' it up!

Tell your mother, your brother, your sister, and your friend.  
And the others, your lovers, better not be present tense.  
Cause I want everyone to know that you are mine and no one else's!

Ain't no other man, can stand up next to you  
Ain't no other man on the planet does what you do  
(what you do).  
You're the kinda guy, a girl finds in a blue moon.  
You got soul, you got class.  
You got style ya bad ass - oh yeah!  
Ain't no other man it's true - alright -  
Ain't no other man but you.

Break it down now!

Ain't no other, ain't, ain't no other! (other)  
Ain't no other, ain't, ain't no other LOVER!  
_Ain't no other, I, I, I need no other!  
Ain't no other man but you!_

Ohhhh!

Ain't no other man, can stand up next to you  
Ain't no other man on the planet does what you do  
(what you do).  
You're the kinda guy, a girl finds in a blue moon.  
You got soul, you got class.  
You got style ya bad ass - oh yeah!  
Ain't no other man it's true - alright -  
Ain't no other man but you.

Ain't no other man, can stand up next to you  
Ain't no other man on the planet does what you do  
(what you do).  
You're the kinda guy, a girl finds in a blue moon.  
You got soul, you got class.  
You got style ya bad ass - oh yeah!  
Ain't no other man it's true - alright -  
Ain't no other man but you.

I flirted and laughed the whole way through. Hopefully I could keep this up for a while because I hadn't seen Jacob be this happy since last Sunday. He was laughing and having a good time and I loved him so much there was nothing I'd rather do than laugh with him.

We got home and I automatically started picking up things around the house. We had left it in a real mess when we left in the middle of the night, well it was a mess in my eyes. I was cleaning everything in sight. I was in the living room when Jacob's arms grabbed my shoulders. He turned me around to look at him and he said, "Please stop cleaning. Please, the house looks fine I promise let's just go get ready. Okay?"

"Fine," I grumbled putting a pillow on the couch and giving him a quick peck on the lips. I walked up stairs with Jake on my heels. I looked in my huge closet trying to figure out what to wear.

I found I powder pink Nicolangela pleat detail, Laura dress. I felt that wearing pink was fitting. I found a gray pinstriped hat to cover my bald scalp., I had been wearing tight hat like the UnderArmor ones; a pair of gray pump with frilly detail, and a watch. I put some things I may need in my gray Coach bag and tied an old scarf, with the breast cancer awareness ribbon printed on it, around the straps. Jacob just threw on a black Armani Exchange dress shirt and some dark jeans.

"You ready to go," he asked slipping his hand through mine.

"I have to be," I said walking down the stairs and to his truck.

When we arrived at the church I did not go in the main entrance with Jacob. I went to the back where I the choir members where. When I entered the room everyone got quite. "Renesmee," the choir director, Mark, whispered coming up to me. "What's wrong?"

"I'm sick," I said and shrugged. I decided that was a mistake because that little gesture was painful.

"Will you be okay to preform," he asked truly worried.

"Yes, I'll be fine," I told him and then left to go talk to the other choir members. Malyssa still hadn't seen me. She wasn't a member of the choir and I didn't want to see the look on her face when I walked up front.

We went to stand in the rows behind the preacher. I sat knowing people where looking at me. I looked around for Jacob and saw him sitting next to Seth and Malyssa. Seth was holding Malyssa close and Malyssa was looking away. I could spot a tear rolling down her cheek.

We all began to sing, "_Our God is an awesome God. He reigns from heaven above with Wisdom, Power and Love. Our God is an awesome God._" We sang that along with many other songs of worship then it was my turn.

I began with the song, "I Can Only Imagine," by Mercy Me.

_I can only imagine _

_What it will be like  
When I walk  
By your side _

_I can only imagine  
What my eyes will see  
When your face  
Is before me  
I can only imagine _

_Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel  
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still  
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall  
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all  
I can only imagine, I can only imagine _

_I can only imagine  
When that day comes  
And I find myself  
Standing in the Son  
_

_I can only imagine  
When all I will do  
Is forever  
Forever worship You  
I can only imagine  
_

_Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel  
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still  
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall  
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all  
I can only imagine_

_Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel  
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still  
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall  
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all  
I can only imagine, I can only imagine_

_I can only imagine_

_I can only imagine_

_I can only imagine_

_I can only imagine_

_I can only imagine  
When all I will do  
Is forever, forever worship you _

The next song I was going to sing wasn't a christian song, but a country song. It described my life at this moment and I felt like I needed to sing it. The song was "If I Die Young," by The Band Perry. I had tweaked some of the words to make it fit more for me but not to many.

_If I die young bury me in satin  
Lay me down on a bed of roses  
Sink me in the river at dawn  
Send me away with the words of a love song  
Oh oh Oh oh_

Lord make me a rainbow, I'll shine down on my mother  
She'll know I'm safe with you when she stands under my colors, oh and  
Life ain't always what you think it ought to be, no  
Ain't even gray, but she buries her baby

The sharp knife of a short life, well  
I've had just enough time

If I die young bury me in satin  
Lay me down on a bed of roses  
Sink me in the river at dawn  
Send me away with the words of a love song

The sharp knife of a short life, well  
I've had just enough time

And I'll be wearing white when I come into your kingdom  
I'm as green as the ring on my little cold finger  
I've sure known the lovin' of a man  
And it felt real nice when he was holding my hand  
There's a man here in town says he loves me forever  
Who would have thought forever could be severed by

The sharp knife of a short life, well  
I've had just enough time

So put on your best boys and I'll wear my pearls  
What I never did is done

A penny for my thoughts, oh no I'll sell them for a dollar  
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner  
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'  
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'

If I die young bury me in satin  
Lay me down on a bed of roses  
Sink me in the river at dawn  
Send me away with the words of a love song  
Oh oh

The ballad of a dove  
Go with peace and love  
Gather up your tears, keep 'em in your pocket  
Save them for a time when your really gonna need them oh

The sharp knife of a short life, well  
I've had just enough time

So put on your best boys and I'll wear my pearls  


I was had a few tears rolling down my face. That song had been full of emotion for me. People in the church where crying, especially the ones I knew very well. They knew I had kids, they knew I was young and they where probably thinking everything I was thinking. I

Instead of going to sit with the choir I went to go sit with Jacob. When I sat down next to him, with people's gazes following me the whole time, he pulled me closer. He put his head on the top of my head as his arms wrapped around my waist letting out a sigh. Ma lyssa reached out to take my hand as the preacher began. "Like you Renesmee. We will all be praying for you, Jacob, Caden, Sarah, and the rest of your family in this hard time." I just closed my eyes and nodded. "Now I was going to go over The Prodigals Son but I have changed mt mind. Let's take a look at the book of Revelations shall we," the minister said opening his bible.

When everyone was leaving people would stop by to tell us they would be praying for myself and my family. I knew to expect that and I knew I should be comforted by that but I wasn't. Jake went to talk to Seth for a while in one of the kids Sunday school rooms while I went to talk to Malyssa in the "Woman's room," A.K.A. the nursing room. Malyssa shut the door and when she turned to me I fell into my sister's arms.

I started sobbing into her shoulder. "Shh," she said touching my head. "I would say it will all be okay but I know that's not what you want to hear Ness."

"Your right," I said looking up at her. "That's not what I want to hear. I don't want to know that people will be praying for me. I don't care that God does things for reasons. I want to know that Sarah and Caden will be okay. That Jake will still be happy. That he'll be able to take care of them. I want to know that my family wont be in pain. That every time my birthday roles around my parents wont be sad. I want everyone to be happy. I want to watch my children grow up and live there life. I want to watch them fall in love. I want a bunch of things and I want to know a lot of things and none of the wants are doing me any good," I yelled venting getting it off my chest. I had been afraid to say these words to Jake, I didn't want to hurt him anymore than he already was.

"Ness," Malyssa sighed. "I wish I knew the right words to say. I wish I knew that everything was going to be okay, but I don't. I can tell you this though. Jacob is strong and those kids, if you pass away which I am doubtful of, those kids will know how amazingly wonderful there mother is. They will remember you from there short years on this earth. They will know how much there mom loved them. So will Jacob and everyone else. They all have perfect memories and you have videos and pictures to help them remember. I'm not saying it would be easy but everyone eventually would be okay. They would make it through until they saw you again."

I looked up at her. "Is that what you honestly think."

"Nessie," she said shaking her head. "I don't think that's what would happen, I know that's what would happen."

"Thanks Lyss," I said hugging her. "You are the best sister I've ever had."

She laughed. "I'm the only sister you've ever had and we just claim each other as sisters."

"Like I said. You're the best sister I've ever had."

"Thanks Renesmee. You are the best sister I've ever had too. I love you sissy," she whispered.

"Love you too," I whispered back.

**Jacob's POV**

When Seth and I walked into the room he pulled me in one of those guy hugs where you clasp hands and you hug with the other arm. I was with the only person, that right now I could cry in front of. I wouldn't let myself cry in front of the kids or Ness so I hadn't had a chance to say what I felt since that night Ness started chemo.

I sat down in a chair and put my face in my hands to cry. "Jacob," Seth said. "You can talk now. It's just me and you."

I looked up at him with tears in my eyes. "I don't want her to die. I don't know what I would do if she died. It scares me."

"If. If something ever happened to Malyssa I don't know what I would do either but you know what you have to keep you going that I wouldn't?"

"What," I grumbled.

"You have Caden and Sarah. In them, each and everyday, you would see a little part of Renesmee. You wouldn't loose her completely. You would get to watch those two wonderful children grow. Sarah would probably grow up to look just like Ness."

"We where supposed to watch them grow up together," I grumbled.

"You just need to see what happens. You'll be able to handle it Jake. Now why don't you go spend some time with her."

"Thanks bro," I said standing up. He gave me another hug and I went to see Renesmee.

**Nessie's POV**

When we got home I told Jake I wanted to sleep under the stars. We had a little lake with a hill looking over it. There was a cute little weeping willow at the top of the hill that I wanted to sleep under. Jacob got numerous thick blankets because he didn't want me getting cold. I kept trying to explain to him that it was summer plus he was a werewolves. His temperature was always over 100 degrees. But he insisted on taking all those stupid blankets.

When he finished assembling the pillows and blankets on the soft grass I walked over and sat on his lap. I was thinking how everything had changed so much in a weeks time. Last week at this moment I was watching _Steel Magnolias_ then everything changed. I turned around and started to kiss Jacob.

I had been so tired lately but I had a sudden burst of energy. Maybe it was a little determination? I kissed him but he pushed me back. "Renesmee," he sighed. "I'm not going to hurt you like that."

"Jacob this is what I want," I said giving him the puppy dog look that always won him over. "Are you really going to deny what I want? Act like it's my first time or something. Just be gentle. Now is that to much to ask for," I asked poking out my lower lip for affect. Jacob leaned in to start kissing me again and I swear that was the slowest he had ever taken my clothes off! It wasn't nescessarly bad. It was kind of sweet. He never did anything to hurt me even though I was usually sore all over.

Right before I fell asleep I turned on my power. With my head on his chest and one hand, I said, "_I love you more than anything and everything. Never, ever forget that Jacob. I will always be in love with you._" And then I drifted off to sleep...


	23. Chapter 23 I Have Nothing To Say

**Chapter 23. I have Nothing to Say**

**Jacob's POV**

I had done what Ness wanted me to do. I was afaid of hurting her but couldn't deny her this. I was more gentle than I had ever been with her and now she was asleep on my chest. With my sleep following quickly after her's.

"Jacob, Jacob," I could hear Edward and Bella calling my name but ignored it. I figured it was just a really weird dream I was having because why would they be here? I kept trying to tune them out but there voices got louder and louder. I reluctantly opened my eyes and I could see them, along with Carlisle running towards me.

"What th-," I started to stay but then I watched Edward stop shot a few feet away from me. He fell to his knees and put his hands on his head. He shook his head like he was in shock.

I watched Bella stop behind him and close her eyes and Carlisle slowly walked over to me. He kneeled down and in the silence when Carlisle went to check Ness's pulse I noticed there was only one heart beating. Her's was a faint little lump and it only had a few beats left in it. My eyes opened in shock and I whispered, "No." I pulled her in closer to me closing my eyes rocking her back and forth. _Thump. Thump. Thump. _Then silence. I let out a shaky breath and pulled her in even closer. My whole body went numb because I was fighting the reality. I couldn't comprehend it. Nothing was making since. I just kept holding her and rocking her. I would stroke her hair and kiss her forehead not letting myself think.

When dawn came I still had her in my arms. Bella and Edward had come closer and to lay there heads on Renesmee. We all stood up and started walking home. I didn't have a plan I just wanted this to all be a dream. I wanted to see Renesmee's eyes open one more time, but with the realization of knowing she never would cut through me so deep. I started to cry through the numbness as we got closer to our mini house.

Edward opened the door for me and I walked in still carrying Ness. I pulled the covers back and then placed Nessie on the bed. I pulled the covers over her and sat next to the bed just holding her hand. I just couldn't leave her. I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned around to see Bella and Edward. "Come on," Bella whispered.

"I can't," I whispered back my voice still managing to crack.

"You have to," Edward said starting to pull me up. I bent back down and kissed her forehead before they dragged me away. We started walking to the main house and I just felt like nothing. I walked in and everyone was there. My guess was that Caden and Sarah where in bed. I sat down on the steps and just sat. I didn't know what else to do. Alice cleared her throat and everyone looked at her.

"When I didn't get a call and I knew for sure I went into her closet. Don't ask I just felt like that is where we used to have a lot of bonding moments. When I was in there I found a nice box that hadn't been there before. On the top the words, _If I Die Young_, where written on it. There where papers and pictures and a lot of envelopes in there. The top envelope was entitled, Funeral. Here is what the letter says."

_Alice,_

_I figured you would be the first one to see this, so I'm writing to you. I must have found the courage to stop fighting if you are reading this. I kept being afraid to let go but it was painful and I didn't like having to hide it. I didn't want to hurt anyone but I'm sure that I have and I'm so sorry. Imagine me crying because I am right now. No don't, they aren't sad tears for me I'm crying for all of you, my loved ones. _

_I'm writing this in the middle of the night. Everyone is at the main house. I'm writing a letter for each person. I also wrote one for Caden and Sarah. Oh Alice this is a letter for you to read to everyone so, Hi Everyone I love you. I know you are all sad but we have things to get done but you don't have to do it at this very moment._

_I made things easier on everyone because I'm just that awesome! (P.S. Imagine me smirking here.) I picked out a Tibi one shoulder navy dress for myself. Oh yeah all this stuff is bookmarked on my computer. I also have some ASOS TOBAGO lace boots along with pearl earrings and a bracelet. Make sure my makeup is done with the makeup that is left on my counter please, if not no big deal I guess. _

_Hm. Lets see. I picked out all the girls dresses too isn't that nice of me! Making things easy on all of you. Well actually it is me being a control freak even after I'm gone. Oh well, (picture me shrugging.) Aunt Alice I have a __Notte by Marchesa dress. It has a nice little bow and it is totally you! Trust me you will love it! Oh and I can't forget you lovely gray booties that are super hot! Anyway momma I got you a tight little gray, black, and white dress that you will look ah-mazing in! You have simple pumps by the way. Grandma Esme I have you a nice little fifties crepe dress that is perfect for you and some nude pumps to go with it. And for you Auntie Rosalie I gave you something short and tight just the way you like it. Maybe you and Uncle Emmett can have some fun tonight. Alright now I'm gagging. You also have black pumps but yours are the shinny kind. I have something picked out for Malyssa too. It is a one shoulder ruffled dress with a pair of cut out heels._

_Make sure you fly Malyssa out to La Push because I know I haven't said this but that is where I want to be buried, oh and can I have a shinny black coffin with white interior. And if it is possible next to Sarah __would be great! Please and thank you. Now I'm sure the guys are about to die with my fashion talk but I just have to talk about Sarah and what she will wear. I have a little ruffled dress for her to wear. Alice make sure she has her leggings on under it please because Jake will not remember. She has some nice flats to wear. When she is at the actual funeral, like the part when I go in the ground make sure she has her Burberry raincoat and rain boots on._

_Jacob this next part is for you. At the funeral, the part that is outside. Well I have a feeling, I think it is just motherly instinct. I could be wrong but I think Caden will be the one screaming and crying and yelling for Mommy saying things like, "Don't put mommy in the ground." That will be Caden/ Sarah will be standing there like a big girl crying silently. You will think you need to get Caden to calm him down and make him be quiet. You will think he needs to be the one to be held and comforted but trust me pick up Sarah. Hold her close okay. She will be the one putting on the front, trying to make things easier on you and everyone but she will be hurting more because she wont have any outlet to let out her emotions she'll be the one hurting on the inside and she will need you more. So just hold her. Tell her how much mommy loves her and tell her you love her too._

_Now typically I would hold Caden but daddy if you don't mind getting him then that would be great. Once he is calmed down he should be okay. They will bounce back better. When everyone is at, well in my head I picture Billy's, after they will be running around like the cute amazing kids they are. _

_The hardest part of this for me is hurting all of you. That is why I'm crying now. I know everyone can handle it but I know in some moments you will be thinking, "I wish Nessie was here." Well guess what I will be. I just I love everyone in this room. Tell Caden and Sarah how much I love them and that I'm always with them. I love everyone soooo much. KISSES! ~Renesmee Carlie Cullen Black_

How did she know to plan everything. Alice said she found the lists of everything she wanted and had already got started. She knew what she wanted her funeral to be and she was already dead. Ugh! I got mad and stood up throwing a lamp at the wall. I punched it once and then again. It felt good to get my anger out. I was becoming drained of my anger and sank down starting to cry. Everyone's eyes where focused on me. "I'm sorry Esme," I mumbled laying my head back against the wall. "Jacob trust me it's fine," she said reassuring me.

We heard two sets of feet upstairs that where on their way down. I took my head out of my hands and looked up waiting to see their faces. They came down the stairs in their p.j.s and their faces lit up when they saw me. "Daddy," they yelled running to me. I stood up opening my arms for them to run into them. They did and I pulled them close and held them there for a long time.

When I finally let them go Sarah was the first to speak, "Where is mommy? Is she sleeping?"

"I guess you could say that," I said looking them in the eyes.

"Mommy. Well mommy isn't going to wake up," I said continually choking over my words.

"Daddy," Sarah whimpered. Her bottom lip poked out and her eyes got watery. The look broke my heart. "Is, Is she with Jesus now?" When she asked this the tears spilled over her eyes. I could only nod. How could a little girl who was only six have this much comprehension? Sarah started to really cry and I held her.

"Wait, what is going on exactly," Caden asked.

"Mommy isn't coming home," I whispered and he still looked confused then Sarah yelled, "Momma's dead Caden don't you get it!"

I pulled her in closer to her with her outburst and I watched as comprehension dawned on Caden's face. "I don't want mommy to be dead," he yelled and I pulled him into my arms to.

"Shh." I kept saying. "Everything will be okay." When I would say things like this it would be followed with things like, "No it wont," and, "I don't believe you."

I didn't know what to do so I just sat down and continued to hold them. I started to rock them back and forth and then I looked at my family. All around it was looks of pity and despair. I couldn't stand it anymore. Tears continued to fall down my face as I closed my eyes and fell asleep with mine and Nessie's children in my arms.

It wasn't right without her laying next to me and the fact that I knew she would never be in my arms again made a shudder run through me. Nothing would ever be right again. I would never feel complete again but I had to keep going for Caden and Sarah Bella. I didn't know what tomorrow had in store for me I just knew it wouldn't be easy...

_**A/N: Truth time! I cried writing this chapter. It wasn't the part where he was numb it was really when Sarah starts crying. It was the fact that she is so young and she realizes mommy isn't coming home. That is what really got to me. Anyway I'm sorry this one was so short but I want this chapter and the next to be separate chapters so it is kind of short and I'm sorry. I hope you are enjoying this story! Last chapter I only got one hater mail! They didn't agree with my decision to give Ness cancer but here is my thing. You don't have to read the story. If you don't like a decission you don't have to tell me and be rude and plain old bitchy about it. If you are like, "It really sucks that you killed her off but you know..." then that is perfectly fine by me. Just don't be rude. Let's just say this writer is now blocked:) Oh there is still a story after this and I hope you continue to read the story! Not so sure the title goes along with the story because I didn't know the ending of the story this summer but that's okay I guess. So please R&R! Enjoy Thanksgiving and be thankful for what you have because I promise about three million people have way crappier lives. (3 million people are living on two dollars a day! Could you imagine? If you buy lunch at school it is $2.25!) Also have a great Black Friday! That is my holiday! I will also add the links for the funeral outfits to my page thing! Hope you enjoyed!**_


	24. Chapter 24 How Do You Stay Strong?

**Chapter 24. How do you Stay Strong?**

**Jacob's POV**

_**A/N: I'm sorry for the crazy lateness of this final chapter, but this time of the year is crazy! Between 12+ hours of cheerleading, end of course testing, final exams, and all the decorating and shopping you have to do (although the last one isn't to bad) it can be hard to find the time to write! If you still want to read the end I love you for it! Don't forget there will be a squeal! There is a lot of music in this chapter. I only use it because I want you to listen to the music if you can to maybe get more of an impact... Really quick before I forget. If you happen to think that six is to young for a little girl to understand what is going on I promise it isn't. This summer a two and a half year old little girl I have known since she was born died (that's the reason for the pen name Always in my Memory.) Anyway she had a brother that was three almost four and one who was five almost six (she was a surprise.) She also had two half brothers. When the youngest, the three year old was told that she had passed away the first words out of his mouth where, "So Merri is with Jessus now?" When he was told yes he then said, "So she isn't coming home is she." I just though I would let you know that at the age of six she really could understand what was going on. I started this story to get my mind off of her death and now I don't need it for that so much. But her third birthday was on December third and we made a book of memories and pictures for the family. It is definitely a tough holiday season for her family. I think it is crazy how I started because of her death and I'm finishing around her birthday! I love you Merri Lynn Elizabeth and I hope you are having a blast in heaven with you grandmother!**_

Today was the day of her funeral. I felt numb again. The past three days I was always focusing on the kids trying to keep myself distracted. When I wasn't with the kids I made sure I was helping to make her funeral perfect because she deserved perfect and nothing less. Alice got the flowers and everything arranged. We bought tickets for the people who lived out of town and weren't in La Push.

Seth was the one to tell Malyssa. I called him the morning after telling the kids and he was in shock over the phone. I could hear a door open when I was talking to him and Malyssa ask who was on the phone. When Seth just whispered my name she knew. She got on the phone and said, "Please tell me she is still alive that if I hop on a plane I'll be able to come and see my sister smiling and laughing and playing with her children. Please." I couldn't answer because I wanted to see Nessie doing those things too. More tears had begun to fall from my face and she knew the answer. I heard her whisper the word no, and then she started crying. Seth got back on and I told him the details. I told him that Ness had picked out a dress for Malyssa too.

I felt like I was nothing. Like I had nothing to live for and I still couldn't figure out how I was going to find a way to keep going. I made sure that everything was ready for today last night there was going to be a little video and picture dedication played at the church. I got up and made sure I looked presentable, then I went to wake up Caden and Sarah and get them ready.

I woke Caden up first. Making sure he was dressed exactly to Alice's suggestions. He didn't seem like he knew today was all about. When I woke up Sarah she knew what was going to be happening. I guess it was true that girls have more emotional understanding and stuff. Maybe it was because she had seen _Steel Magnolias_ too many times. I don't know. She asked to leave early, just the two of us. She said she wanted alone time with mommy.

I left and went to the church with her, leaving Caden with Edward, Bella, and the others. When we got there Ness's shinny black coffin was at the front of the room. Sarah was holding my hand and she looked up at me and said, "Daddy can you step outside for just a minute please?"

"Sure," I said leaning down to kiss her forehead. I left the room and just listened. I could hear her walk up to the front of the church and get a chair from somewhere. She brought to the middle, front of the room and I guess sat down.

I heard her sigh and then she started talking. "I miss you mommy. A lot. Who is going to play dress up with me now? I may have to play with Alice, Rose, Grandma, or Granny. I will probably play with Aunt Malyssa when they aren't around. Mommy, how come Grandma hasn't flipped out like the lady who was the mom in _Steel Magnolias_? Is it because she knows we know how great you are? I remember that lady saying she wanted Shelby's son to know how great his mother was. Well mommy I know you're great! I do!

"I guess I'm going to be the woman of the house hold now but I'm only a little girl! I can't even use the stove. Oh, mommy don't worry about Caden or Daddy I'll take care of them. I'll make sure the house is clean too. I know I don't have to but I want to be like you mommy. I really do.

"Mommy? Do you think daddy will ever smile or laugh again? Will he be happy again? I'll try to make him happy mommy. I really will. I think Caden will be okay don't you? I'm just worried about daddy, I know life goes on I just don't know that he realizes that. I'll help him though momma.

"Mommy thank you for teaching me things. I don't think I would understand everything if you didn't. I wouldn't know that you are in a better place. You are with Jesus that must be awesome momma! So thank you so much for teaching me. I wouldn't be the little girl I am without you.

"It really wont be the same at home without you. Only me, daddy, and Caden. Oh great now I'm crying. It's a good thing I don't wear makeup. Mom did you know you'll never be able to teach me how to put on make-up? Oh I just really miss you mommy! I really do! Just promise you will always be with me! I love you mommy and I know you love me too. Even if you can't tell me anymore, I know you will always be with me. Bye mommy."

I was trying to compose myself and not cry. Sarah was so grownup for her age. It amazed me. She opened the door with tears rolling down her cheeks. I scooped her up in my arms and she whispered, "I love you daddy." "I love you too Sarah," I whispered back and watched as the first of the cars arrived.

When everyone arrived I sat up front with Sarah and Caden on either side of me. Bella and Edward sat next to Caden while Seth and Malyssa sat next to Sarah Bella. When everyone was in the church we all shared stories of Nessie. Starting from the time she was born until she passed away. Since we only invited people in the "know" we could say whatever we wanted. I couldn't get up to talk about her because I didn't want to break down in front of everyone plus I would go on about her forever. Bella and Edward couldn't find it in themselves either. My dad got up to talk about her along with Charlie and the other Cullen's. Malyssa had a lot to say about her and the other imprints talked too. Seth was the only wolf to speak. It was nice to remember all the good and funny times with her, and there where a lot. The best part was when Caden and Sarah went to speak.

"So," Sarah began. "Renesmee was my mommy. She was Caden's too, but I'm sure everyone knew that."

"Yeah Sarah," Caden said and Sarah just rolled her eyes smiling.

"Well I'm gonna miss mommy a lot. She would always play dress up with me and she never would say no to playing barbies like daddy would. Daddy always says, 'Don't you think momma wants to play with you,' and when I'd ask she would always say yes. Mommy would tuck me in to bed and she would always read me a bedtime story. She helped with my school work and would take me to dance and gymnastics. She would help me and teach me what to do. She would always play with my hair and she could always make me smile and laugh even when I was hurt. I knew she loved me she told me everyday. I'm just really gonna miss mommy being here everyday. Caden it is your turn now," Sarah said turning to him.

"Well mommy was your typical soccer mom. She would drive me to practice when daddy couldn't and she was always at my games even if it was seven in the morning and raining. She would always tell me and Sarah how much she loved us. I don't know what I'll do without her," he finished. Caden didn't have the same way with words as Sarah did. Both of my beautiful children walked down and sat next to me. I pulled them in close as Carlisle started to talk.

"Well I'm going to speak for a lot of people right now. Kind of everyone. They are all in to much pain to speak and that is okay. I'll say what they told me or what I have observed.

"Renesmee lived nothing short of a full life. She had a great up bringing in my opinion. She had a way of getting everyone to love her. There was always a smile on her face. Even during her final days. I think it was that constant smile, that was there even when she was a baby, that caught everyone's attention at first.

"Then they would really get to know Nessie. People would fall for her care free ways and her always present laughter. When you really knew her you knew even though she was care free she was always caring for people and she was always compassionate.

"Even though she had or could have countless material objects she really did enjoy the simpler things in life. She always loved singing and playing piano with her daddy and talking about books and romance with her mom. Her Grandma was always there to teach her anything any "housewife" would want to know or just to talk. She loved playing dress up with her Auntie Alice and Aunt Rosalie and when she was older she loved to shop with them. She was always entertained by her overprotective and always fighting uncles. Her best friend or sister came along and they started doing pretty much everything together.

"But ever since she was little nothing was like her relationship with her Jacob. You could see it in her eyes. Every time he'd walk in a room she was in she would light up. Through out the years the way she lit up changed. She fell in love with Jacob.

"When she would hold his hand or if they were just sitting on the couch talking and watching reruns of old _That 70's Show, _she never looked more at home or more peaceful. That love with Jacob turned into their two amazing children.

"Those two kids, Sarah and Caden, where what she called her two biggest accomplishments. She said she couldn't ever understand how she was so lucky. She had the best family she could ever want; the greatest, most loving husband to ever walk the Earth, by the way these are things she has said to me; and she had the two most amazing children.

"Ness was happy to just sit back and watch her kids do what they loved and wanted to do. Even if that meant early morning soccer games in the freezing cold or dance practices every other night that there wasn't soccer or cheer. She loved sharing these things with her family and she loved sharing these things with Jacob.

"Well I think we are about done here. Alice has more to share with us after her burial when we are back at Billy's. There is a video she put together along with a message from Ness."

Everyone started to get up. I stayed sitting for a while. I couldn't find it in myself to do this. Tears were streaming down my face. I couldn't find it in myself to get up. A little hand touched mine and Sarah said, "It's okay daddy. We will be okay. But you have to get up now. Let's go tell her goodbye now." I opened my eyes and looked at Sarah. She was so much like her mother it amazed me. Always trying to help everyone else and keep things under control. "Alright," I whispered and got up taking Sarah's hand and putting Caden on my shoulders. Bella and Edward were waiting on me at the door.

We walked to the cemetery with no conversation, because well what could be said. There baby girl was gone. I could not imagine ANYTHING happening to Caden or Sarah. If anyone every touched them I would kill them in a heartbeat. The same had went for Ness but the worst part was, there was no way to even the score. There was no one to get even with. We caught it to late and things affected her differently than most people.

When we arrived, her sleek, black casket was on a little stand. Her headstone was next to my mothers. My mom's said, "_Sarah Black. 'Beloved Wife and Mother who will be greatly missed._" That was true to this day. On Renesmee's it said, "_Renesmee Black. 'Amazing. No one will come close to her. She will always be on our minds.'_" It wasn't what you would traditionally say but it fit all the same. The preacher was there and he started his service. I felt numb again. I couldn't take it all in because I was afraid to feel that much pain. I heard everyone start to cry. They went to start lowering her into the ground and Renesmee was right.

Caden started to scream like a mad man. "I want my momma! Stop it! Stop! Don't put her in the ground please! Stop it! Stop!" He started at first just yelling and then he ran over to one of the people lowering her and kicked him. When that didn't work he bit his arm almost making him drop her. I ran over to Caden and picked him up moving him out of the way. "Caden," I said kneeling down to look him in the eye, "It will be okay." I was about to say more when I glanced over an saw Sarah standing there silently rocking with her violent tears.

What Ness wrote came rushing back. In a second Edward was next to me picking Caden up and holding him tight to his chest. I walked over to Sarah with tears falling over my cheeks again. I picked up Sarah as she let out a little whimper. She was shaking with her tears and I just held her tight shaking myself. I stroked her hair and just held her. "You are going to be okay. I love you, so does mommy. She is here with us I promise. Just trust me. We will be fine. We are going to make it." I was saying all these thing but I was having trouble believing myself.

I had no idea how I was going to do this on my own, without her. I glanced at Edward and he had the same facial expression as I did. His eyes where closed holding back tears that would never come. He was shaking his head trying not to believe what was going on. He rocked Caden back and forth like a baby or something but it had calmed him down. Bella sat in a seat just staring at the sky. Everyone had started to leave for Dad's. I couldn't leave yet. I looked where Bella was looking and saw a rainbow. I don't know why but it was like a little omen of hope.

I got up and walked over to Edward and Bella and we started towards my dad's. I glanced back and all there was, was a pile of dirt. All the sudden I was numb again. She was really gone. Forever.

Everyone was talking when we got to my dad's house. Caden and Sarah had both fallen asleep so Edward and I went to tuck them into bed. When we walked into the living room Alice had a large whit screen on one wall and everyone was gathered around. "I put this together," Alice said, "To show some of the wonderful times or simple times in Nessie's life. There is also a message from her at the end."

With that the lights went out and her first baby picture showed on the screen. Then there was a video of her taking her first few steps to Bella as Edward video taped. Everyone was clapping and cheering for her so she was encouraged to do more. She looked over to where I was and you could hear a little growl escape from Edward.

Everyone laughed a little at that and it even got a smile from me. There where numerous milestones on video or camera through out the video. I had been present for all of them. There were picture from the night we got engaged and then some from prom. It was entertaining to see the videos and pictures from her party the night before our wedding. Then I finally saw the videos of her getting ready. "You nervous?" Alice had asked. "I haven't decided yet," she said smiling into the camera.

"I'm not nervous about getting married or being married and nothing about Jacob could ever make me nervous but for some reason I feel nervous. I think I'm afraid the Bella in my will come out walking down the isle and I'll trip and break my face," she laughed.

Alice laugh too, "That would be Bella for you."

"Hey," Bella had said walking into the room. "Don't talk about someone when they can still hear you down the hall. Ness you look stunning."

"Thanks mom," she said blushing then she looked at herself in the full length mirror and that video cut off.

Nest where picture from the ceremony. I could remember every single detail. After that were the videos of our first dance, her dances with my dad and Edward, some random ones of her dancing with guest, and then the one to "I Wanna Make You Close Your Eyes." We hadn't thought anyone had been watching but it felt so good to see her head on my chest with a small content smile on her face. All the videos from our honeymoon were on there and some from the week we stayed at the Cullen's.

Then there was a video of us about a month college. Ness looked so young and vibrant. So alive. She was in one of my sweatshirts and some Soffe shorts. I was just in basketball shorts. I remembered the night. We had nothing better to do so we just pulled out a video camera and goofed off. I was taken back to that day...

"So," I said zooming in on her face. "What is it liked being married to me?"

"Lets see," she said smiling looking up at me. "I think it's pretty great."

"Oh you do?"

"Yup," she said popping her p.

"Well I'm gonna have to change that," I said smiling.

She rolled her eyes. "Jacob black you know just as well as I do you could never be mean to me."

"I never said I was going to try and make your life worse. Pretty great just isn't enough. I'm going to make your life perfect."

"And how are you going to do that?"

I bent over and kissed her lightly on the lips. I had the kiss on camera and I could feel the small smile form on her lips.

"I love you," I whispered and a huge grin took over her face.

"Your right," she said continuing to grin. "My life is perfect!"

"Glad I could help," I laughed.

"My turn," she yelled and took the camera from me with a grin on her face. "So what does such a hot guy as yourself think of being tied down and in college? I mean it's a Friday night I'm sure there is some Frat party going on somewhere. You could go down to one and have any girl you want."

"Why would I want any of those girls," I asked. "I would much rather be here right now with you," I said tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Plus if I did go to a party I would take you with me and then I'd end up in jail because there would be tons of dumb boys trying to hit on you.

Renesmee trilling laugh filled the room. "Okay, okay," she said still laughing. "I get it. No parties for you. So why did you pick me. I mean besides the imprinting thing."

"Ness you don't give yourself enough credit. You are the most amazing person I've ever known and could ever have the pleasure of knowing. Your beautiful but not just on the inside but the outside too."

"Doesn't it usually go outside then inside," she interrupted.

"Hold on I'm not done. I don't know what I did to deserve you though."

"How did I get so lucky," she whispered.

"I was just about to say the same thing."

"This is way off topic and I don't want to talk about it to much. Lets just make a promise though. If anything happens to either one of us and we have kids or something we find a way to keep going."

"Where did this come from," I asked sitting up straighter.

"You remember when the Volturi came when I was younger." I nodded. "Well one time mom said the reason she thought they came at the time was because she was so incredibly happy. That maybe you can only have so much happiness and she had used all hers up. I'm just so happy and I'm afraid something will go wrong," she finished her eyes getting glassy.

"Hey," I said getting up and shifting so I was next to her. I knocked the camera out of her hand and it fell so it was still facing us. My hands stroked her face as I looked her in the eyes and she clung to my wrists. "Don't ever say that again. Okay. You have no reason to be scared. Ever. I'll always protect I'll always be here. I'm not going anywhere and your happiness can only grow. Alright?"

"Just promise,"she whispered a tear rolling down her cheek.

"I promise," I whispered back. I kissed her forehead and let my lips linger for a second. "You wanna dance," I whispered.

A small smile broke across her face. Dancing could always make her feel better. It never failed. "Sure."

I grabbed the camera and put it on a shelf above our bed. Ness walked over to out stereo system and turned it to "Crazy in Love," by Beyonce. I knew what that meant, she wanted to couple dance. She slipped on a pair of heels that she kept near the stereo system and got up I walked over and took her hand to dance with her.

_Yes! so crazy right now  
Most incredibly  
It's your girl b  
It's your boy young  
History in the makin  
[part 2]_

I look and stare so deep in your eyes  
I touch on you more and more every time  
When you leave i'm beggin you not to go  
Call your name two, three times in a row  
Such a funny thing for me to try to explain  
How i'm feeling and my pride is the one to blame  
Yeah, cause i know i don't understand  
Just how your love can do what no on else can

Got me lookin so crazy right now  
Your love's got me lookin so crazy right now  
(your love)  
Got me lookin so crazy right now your touch's  
Got me lookin so crazy right now  
(your touch)  
Got me hoping you page me right now your kiss's  
Got me hoping you save me right now  
Lookin so crazy your love's got me lookin  
Got me lookin so crazy your love

When i talk to my friends so quietly  
â€œwho he think he is?Ã¤ look at what you've done to me  
Tennis shoes don't even need to buy a new dress  
You ain't there, ain't nobody else to impress  
It's the way that you know what i thought i knew  
It's the beat that my heart skips when i'm with you  
Yeah, but i still don't understand  
Just how your love can do what no one else can

Got me lookin so crazy right now  
Your love's got me lookin so crazy right now  
(your love)  
Got me lookin so crazy right now your touch's  
Got me lookin so crazy right now  
(your touch)  
Got me hoping you page me right now your kiss's  
Got me hoping you save me right now  
Lookin so crazy your love's got me lookin  
Got me lookin so crazy your love

I'm warmed up now  
Let's go

Young hova  
Ya'll know when the flow is loco  
Young b and the r-o-c uh oh  
O-g, big homie  
The one and only  
Stick boney but the pockets are fat like tony

Soprano the roc handle  
Like van exel  
I shake phonies man, you can't get next to  
A genuine article, i do not sing tho  
I sling though , if anything i bling yo

Star like ringo  
War like a green berret  
You're crazy bring your whole set  
Jay-z in the range  
Crazy and deranged  
They can't figure him out  
They're like hey is he insane?

Yes sir i'm cut from a different cloth  
My texture is the best fur, im chinchilla

I've been ill of the chain smokers  
How you think i go the name hova  
I've been reala'  
The game's over

Fall back young ever since  
I made you change over to platinum  
The game's been a wrap  
One

Got me looking so crazy, my baby  
I'm not myself lately  
I'm foolish, i don't do this  
I've been played myself  
Baby i don't care  
Cuz your love got the best of me  
And baby you're making a fool of me  
You got me sprung and i don't care who sees  
Cuz baby you got me so crazy

Got me lookin so crazy right now  
Your love's got me lookin so crazy right now  
(your love)  
Got me lookin so crazy right now your touch's  
Got me lookin so crazy right now  
(your touch)  
Got me hoping you page me right now your kiss's  
Got me hoping you save me right now  
Lookin so crazy your love's got me lookin  
Got me lookin so crazy your love 

Ness had went total Beyonce and I was once again at a loss of words thinking of how lucky I was. She had ended by pushing me on the bed and then another song started to play. She was going to dance for me now, and I didn't mind. She started with "Ain't No Other Man," by Christina Aguliara.

_Do your thang honey!_

Ain't no other man, can stand up next to you  
Ain't no other man on the planet does what you do  
(what you do).  
You're the kinda guy, a girl finds in a blue moon.  
You got soul, you got class.  
You got style with your bad ass - oh yeah!  
Ain't no other man its true - alright -  
Ain't no other man but you.

Do your thang honey!

Never thought I'd be alright. No, no, no!  
Till you came and changed my life. Yeah, yeah, yeah!  
What was cloudy now is clear! Yeah, yeah!  
For the light that I needed.  
You got what I want boy, and I want it!  
_So keep on givin' it up!_

Tell your mother, your brother, your sister, and your friend.  
And the others, your lovers, better not be present tense.  
Cause I want everyone to know that you are mine and no one else's!

Ain't no other man, can stand up next to you  
Ain't no other man on the planet does what you do  
(what you do).  
You're the kinda guy, a girl finds in a blue moon.  
You got soul, you got class.  
You got style ya bad ass - oh yeah!  
Ain't no other man it's true - alright -  
Ain't no other man but you. 

It then transitioned into "Angel," by Natasha Bedingfield.

_A.n.g.e.l  
A.n.g.e.l_

Just like a shadow  
I'll be beside you  
I'll be your comfort  
And let it guide you home  
I will provide you a place of shelter  
I want a be your zone  
Tell me what to do  
Tell me what you wanted me to do  
I'll make you great to be a man  
With a woman who can stand  
Who will never promise to leave her man  
Making vows to please her man

If I could be your angel  
Your angel, Your angel  
Protect you from the pain  
I'll keep you safe from danger  
You'll never hurt again  
I'll be your a.n.g.e.l  
I'm gona be your a.n.g.e.l  
I'll be your angel  


_Tell me why there's so many good men  
And the world's misunderstood  
He's a dog, he's no good  
I wish somebody would  
Disrespect my man  
You're gonna have to come see me  
I go hard for my baby  
__He's all that I need_

So if you got a good one  
Put your hands up,  
Come on girl and stand up  
Go ahead lift your man up  
Get up  
If you got a good one, put your hands up  
Go ahead lift your man up  
Get up  
If you got a good one, stand up  
Come on girl, and stand up

If I could be your angel  
Your angel, Your angel  
Protect you from the pain  
I'll keep you safe from danger  
You'll never hurt again  
I'll be your a.n.g.e.l  
I'm gonna be your a.n.g.e.l  
I'll be your angel

After that came "Only Girl in the World."

_Want you to take me like a thief in the night  
Hold me like a pillow, make me feel right  
Baby I'll tell you all my secrets that I'm keepin', you can come inside  
And when you enter, you ain't leavin', be my prisoner for the night_

Want you to make me feel like I'm the only girl in the world  
Like I'm the only one that you'll ever love  
Like I'm the only one who knows your heart  
Only girl in the world...  
Like I'm the only one that's in command  
Cuz I'm the only one who understands, like I'm the only one who knows your heart, only one...

Take me for a ride  
Oh baby, take me high  
Let me make you first  
Oh make it last all night  
Take me for a ride  
Oh baby, take me high  
Let me make you first  
Make it last all night 

When it changed to "Move, Shake, Drop" by Pitbull I felt like a lucky man.

I wanna see you move move shake shake now drop (what your momma say)  
Move move shake shake now drop (what your daddy say)  
_Move move shake shake now drop (what your sista say)  
Move move shake shake now drop drop drop drop_

Move it to the dance floor  
Make that body work girl  
Don't be scared shake that thang  
We got plenty of cash girl  
You call your friends n then I call my friends  
N we can do the thang in the back of the benz

Cause I like booty n n n I like booty n n n I like booty n n n I like booty n n n

I wanna see you move move shake shake now drop (what your momma say)  
Move move shake shake now drop (what your daddy say)  
Move move shake shake now drop (what your sista say)  
Move move shake shake now drop drop drop drop 

After that jaw dropping performance by the sexiest woman alive the song "Your Love is my Drug" by Ke$ha began.

_Hey, so I got a question  
Do you wanna have a slumber party in my basement?  
Do I make your heart beat like an 808 drum  
Is my love your drug? your drug?  
Hi, your drug?  
Hi, your drug?  
Is my love your drug?_

Because your love your love your love is my drug  
Your love your love your love  
I said your love your love your love is my drug  
Your love your love your love

Because your love your love your love is my drug  
Your love your love your love  
I said your love your love your love is my drug  
Your love your love your love

When that song was over the Brittany Spears song "Slave for You" came on.

_All you people look at me like I'm a little girl.  
Well did you ever think it be okay for me to step into this world._

Always saying little girl don't step into the club.  
Well I'm just tryin' to find out why cause dancing's what I love.

Get it get it, get it get it (WHOOOA)  
Get it get it, get it get it (WHOOOOOA) (Do you like it)  
Get it get it, get it get it (OOOHHHH) (This feels good)  
_  
I know I may come off quiet, I may come off shy.  
But I feel like talking, feel like dancing when I see this guy._

What's practical is logical. What the hell, who cares?  
All I know is I'm so happy when you're dancing there.

I'm a slave for you. I cannot hold it; I cannot control it.  
I'm a slave for you. I won't deny it; I'm not trying to hide it.

Baby, don't you wanna, dance upon me,  
(I just wanna dance next to you)  
To another time and place.  
Baby, don't you wanna, dance upon me,  
(Are you ready)  
Leaving behind my name, my age.  
(Lets go)

(Like that)  
(You like it)  
(Now watch me)

Get it get it, get it get it (WHOOOA)  
Get it get it, get it get it (WHOOOOOA)

_Get it get it, get it get it (OOOHHHH)  
(Panting)_

I really wanna dance, tonight with you.  
(I just can't help myself)  
I really wanna do what you want me to.  
(I just feel I let myself go)

I really wanna dance, tonight with you.  
(Wanna see you move)  
I really wanna do what you want me to.  
(Uh Uh Uh)

Baby, don't you wanna, dance upon me,  
(I just wanna dance next to you)  
To another time and place.  
Baby, don't you wanna, dance upon me,  
(Are you ready)  
Leaving behind my name, my age.

I'm a slave for you. (Take that) I cannot hold it; I cannot control it.  
I'm a slave (It just feels right) for you. (It just feels good)  
I won't deny it; I'm not trying to hide it. (Baby)

_Get it get it, get it get it (WHOOOA)  
Get it get it, get it get it (WHOOOOOA)  
Get it get it, get it get it (OOOHHHH)  
(Panting)_

Get it get it, get it get it (WHOOOA)  
Get it get it, get it get it (WHOOOOOA)  
Get it get it, get it get it (OOOHHHH)  
(Panting)

I'm a slave for you. (Here we go now)  
I cannot hold it; I cannot control it.  
I'm a slave for you. (Here we go) I won't deny it, (Yeah)  
I'm not trying to hide it.

(Like that) 

When the video was cut of due to Ness shutting off the camera I was brought back to reality. As I glanced around I was getting looks out of the corner of everyone's eyes. I think that everyone knew what happened next. In fact that could have very well been the night Caden and Sarah where conceived. I couldn't believe Alice played this video. I guess she wanted to show a different side of Ness. Not all of it was her dancing sexy or like in the last part where she was kind of dancing on me. Some of it showed her pure talent for dance.

As I tried to shake off all the looks and smirks I continued to watch the video. The next video was a small one Alice had taken. It was of Me and Renesmee saying goodbye before I deployed. The next video looked like airport security video tape. You got the video at a couple different angles. It was after I had gotten shot. You saw her come running towards me through the airport and then she jumped into my arms. People clapped and it was kind of like the scene from _Dear John_.

In the next video Renesmee was walking around in a hospital gown in the hallway outside Carlisle's office. "Hey hun, how you doing?" Alice sing-songed.

"I just want Jake to be here."

"You know you can't really stop this once it has started right?"

Ness rolled her eyes then smirked. "Watch me."

After that it was after Caden and Sarah Bella had been born. I was thankful Alice didn't put her actually giving birth on this video. There was tons of video of Ness with the kids. My favorite and the last one was before the twins birthday party. She was in a cute little dress and she looked like such a mother. She was in the grass playing with Caden and Sarah.

They were all laughing like crazy as she tickled them and then they attacked her with tickles. I pulled up the driveway and they all looked over. When I got out of my truck Caden and Sarah yelled, "Daddy," and came running towards me. The camera went back to Renesmee and a huge smile was spread across her face as she got up and came walking towards me. The kids were walking to go back to playing when Ness got to me that smile still on her face. She placed her hand on my chest and kissed me.

You saw me shut my door as I put my arm around her shoulders and pulled her in to kiss her forehead. She had her arm around my waist and her head on my chest as we walked to Caden and Sarah Bella. We both got down with them and the last frame was Ness with a huge smile on her face my arms wrapped around her my head on her shoulder and her leaning back into me. We where both looking down at our beautiful, perfect children playing looking perfectly content. It was hard to believe that was only a few weeks ago. So,so much had changed since then. There wasn't any video of her sick. Even though she had been strong I was now a little more content seeing her like that.

We had been watching the videos for about an hour and a half. The lights came on and I could hear Caden and Sarah in the kitchen. "Come here daddy come here now," she was yelling and I rushed towards the kitchen. I walked in and saw Sarah on a chair in front of the sink looking out the window with Caden. When I walked in she pointed out the window. "Look Daddy look," she said with a huge smile. "It's mommy!"

"Sarah sweetie," I started my chest tightening but she continued.

"Just look Dad," she huffed.

I walked over to the window and looked out. There was someone in all white looking out at the ocean. It looked like they had wings on? I got closer putting my hand on the glass and the person turned around. "Renesmee," I whispered and started running towards the door. I ignored the strange looks and walked out the door. She was gone. But then I saw some white at the corner of the house and when I turned I could see the back of her dress it was like she was just out of reach. Finally when I reached the edge of the forest there she was. She turned around and she looked amazing.

She didn't look sick or fragile. She looked healthy and full of life. Her hair was back and she had a smile that took my face away. Tears formed in my eyes. "Is it really you," I whispered and she nodded still smiling. "It's me."

I took a deep breath and whispered, "How?"

"You are one lucky person you know that. Hardly anyone can become an angel. Well you can but I just made it to heaven a couple days ago. God saw how much you needed one. He knew I was perfect for the job. I know your sad Jake but everything will be okay."

I stepped closer to her. "Your an angel."

"Yes Jacob," she said rolling her eyes and smiling. "Didn't I just say I was an angel. Boy are you slow today. Most people just look down and watch out for you, but you know how I sang and danced to that Angel song well now I really am your angel! Oh and tell Alice that the next time I see her she is soo dead for that video of me that night," she said laughing.

"How come you are in such a good mood?"

"Jacob all I can say is one day you will understand. You know the bible doesn't lie. There are streets of gold and everything there is just amazing! I can't wait for you and the kids to get there! It may seem like a while for everyone down here but time really flies up there. You don't really keep track. It seems like I'll be seeing you in a hour or two."

"So wait," I said. "When you leave you wont come back."

"You won't need me. You saw the promise you made. You will keep going for Caden and Sarah. I'll watch from above and help guide you guys but I'm not coming back, no."

I took another step forward and went to touch her but she pulled away. "Why did you pull away?"

"It is kind of a, 'You can look but you can't touch,' thing. Plus it was always fun to tease you," she said winking.

I got closer so that my face was an inch from her's. "I'm not touching you."

"I know," she whispered. "Our girl is amazing isn't she? Did you hear her talking to me this morning?"

"Yeah I did. She takes after you ya know."

"Just tell everyone how much I love them. Especially Caden and Sarah. I'm always here know that okay?"

"Alright. I know."

"I love you," she whispered and then she turned and started towards the woods.

"Ness wait," I said walking towards her and she turned.

"I love you too. Just help me please. I miss you so much," my words were filled with emotion.

"Don't worry. I'll help, I'll also help you know when you should give those letters. I'm waiting okay. Just enjoy watching them grow. I'm right there with you." She turned and I walked her walk away for the last time.

I was still upset but I felt like I had more closer though. I walked to the front of the house in a daze. Edward and Bella were there with Caden and Sarah. "Did you see," I whispered tears once again escaping from my eyes. And he nodded looking "teary eyed" too.

"I can't believe it," he whispered.

"Me either," I whispered back.

I looked in the sky and saw a rainbow. The lyrics of if "If I Die Young" that Nessie had sung came to me. _Lord Make me a rainbow. I'll shine down on my mother. She'll know I'm safe with you when she stands under my colors. _

"Look Bella," I whispered pointing to the rainbow. A small sob broke through her chest but she had a little smile on her lips. She closed her eyes and leaned on Edward's chest.

He stared into the sky and I sat down with Caden and Sarah. "Are you guys okay?"

They both nodded. "We are doing better," Sarah said looking at the rainbow too. Just as I was thinking that no one would ever lean there head on my chest again Sarah yawned and put her head there and a few minutes later so did Caden.

I didn't know how but I knew I was going to make it. It wouldn't be easy but what choice did I have? Caden and Sarah deserved the absolute best. Maybe I would stop shifting and I would always look like their dad not some twenty seven year old. It didn't know how to make it work but I did know that Renesmee _will _be with me the whole time...

**The End**


	25. Author's Note

**Author's Note:**

I'm done! I hope I met your standards! It may not be perfect but I hope you liked it! I'm kind of relieved to be done! I love all my readers and reviewers! You guys are truly the best! Thank you for being supportive and patient! You are always patient especially with waiting for this last chapter! I know it is over but add an author alert! There is a sequel to this and it may come out during the summer? I feel like it wasn't really I cliff hanger so you should be okay... I may work on it before then that way when I start to upload the chapters are pre-wrote and you don't have to wait as long! You can still tell other about the story1 Just because you are done others can discover it! I am sooooooo thankful for you guys! Everyone have a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS! (If you don't happen to celebrate then happy whatever holiday you celebrate, I refrain from saying happy holidays. I'm a christian you don't have to be part of my religion but I'm not going to go out of my way to make sure little Joe Bob's feelings aren't hurt because I didn't recognize his holiday. I think it is just ridiculous! You could say happy Honica to me and I would be like Happy Honica to you too! I mean when teachers have to send notes home to see if you can have a "holiday" party it is crazy! You can through a Halloween party no problem, and I don't like Halloween that much, but oh lord forbid we say the words Christmas, or Pray, or God Bless You. Gosh I hate the ACLU! They scare our poor teachers. I'll stop venting now! Sorry!) So **THANK YOU AND GOD BLESS!**

~Always In My Memory

xoxo

Really quick with my music choices I tried to use it to symbolize how care free they once were... By love you all! Kisses!


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